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SOLVED with Mark Manson
Mark Manson
New episodes every month. Life advice that doesn’t suck by a 3x #1 NYT bestselling author. I’ve spent two decades calling out everything wrong with the self-help world: the bad science, the guru nonsense, and the advice that preys on people's insecurities. This podcast is my no-BS, research-backed answer to all of it.
- 102 episodes
- fortnightly
- Avg 1 hr 29 min
- English
Counted on this page — what you have heard stays on this device, so it is not something the list can be paged by.
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#6Oct 1, 2025 · 3 hr 26 minHow to Become Resilient, Solved
Mark Manson unpacks the science and psychology of resilience with real-life examples: Ernest Shackleton’s stranded crew and a personal endurance-race experiment.
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#5Sep 1, 2025 · 3 hr 41 minHow to Let Go of Your Shame, Solved
Mark Manson goes deep on shame—what it is, where it comes from, why it becomes so powerful, and how it damages relationships, work, and self-worth.
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#4Aug 1, 2025 · 3 hr 17 minHow To Finally Let Yourself Be Happy, Solved
Mark Manson and Drew explain why chasing happiness backfires and share evidence-based ways to feel better.
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#3Jul 1, 2025 · 4 hr 18 minHow to Manage Your Emotions, Solved
Mark Manson and Drew unpack the science of emotion: what emotions are, why we feel them, and whether we can get better at feeling. This evidence-based episode breaks down the biology, neuroscience, evolution, culture, and language that shape emotional experience, and explains how that knowledge helps with emotional awareness and regulation.
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#2Jun 1, 2025 · 4 hr 38 minHow to Stop Procrastinating, Solved
Mark Manson and Drew go deep into the psychology, history, and science of procrastination. From Plato and Aristotle to Freud and modern research, we break down why we delay the things that matter most—and how to actually stop.
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#1May 1, 2025 · 4 hr 1 minHow to Find and Live by Your Values, Solved
In this kickoff episode of SOLVED, Mark Manson and Drew are going deep into why your values are the foundation of everything—your happiness, your mental health, your relationships, your sense of meaning—and why so many of us today feel so lost.
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Apr 9, 2025 · 23 minThe Last Podcast
New podcast launches May 1st! We'll be releasing on this same feed, so all you have to do is stay subscribed to this channel and you'll get all the new episodes as they come out. *** After more than 70 episodes and 30 million downloads, I’ve decided to shut down The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck Podcast. Yeah, I know—sounds a little crazy. But the truth is, I wasn’t having fun anymore. The guest treadmill, the pressure to play nice, the temptation to chase clicks instead of meaning—it all started to feel fake. So, I’m pulling the plug. BUT—I’m not going away. I’m launching something new. It’s called Solved—a no-ads, no-guests, deep-dive podcast where each episode tackles one major life topic and breaks it down thoroughly. Think: values, emotions, procrastination—done right, from every angle, with real research and clear implementation. It’s the podcast I wish already existed. So I’m making it. First episode drops May 1 st! Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough Follow me: https://instagram.com/markmanson/ https://twitter.com/IAmMarkManson https://facebook.com/Markmansonnet/ https://linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ https://www.tiktok.com/@iammarkmanson Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
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Apr 2, 2025 · 1 hr 27 minHow to Find the Mindsets that Work For You (ft. Derek Sivers)
I’ve got a special episode for you today. I sat down in person with my longtime friend and first-ever podcast guest, Derek Sivers. We haven’t recorded live before, and honestly, it shows—in the best way. It’s raw, weird, and filled with the kind of conversations we usually when we’re just hanging out together. We dig into Derek’s new book, Useful, Not True, and the big idea behind it: that our beliefs don’t need to be true to be helpful. That spins off into everything from remixing creative influences (metal + Dixieland jazz, anyone?) to why most podcasts—including mine—have gotten painfully predictable. We talk artistic reinvention, Bob Dylan, Bowie, Miles Davis, why most “thought leaders” are just regurgitating each other’s ideas, and why I'm ending the podcast as you know it—and what’s next! We also dive into the deeper stuff: the emotional power of belief, authenticity vs. performative vulnerability, therapy culture, and why sometimes the most liberating thing you can do is reject what everyone else thinks is necessary—relationships, kids, all of it. This was one of the most honest, meandering, and creatively energizing conversations I’ve had in a while. If you’re into big questions, unconventional ideas, and the occasional musical metaphor, this one’s for you. Derek’s new book- Useful, Not True: https://www.amazon.com/Useful-Not-True-Derek-Sivers-ebook/dp/B0D86K4XF5 CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: A Special Live Recording with Derek Sivers 00:01:03 Finding Ideas: Chinese Dictionaries and Creative Remixing 00:03:52 The Miles Davis Principle: Why Success Means It's Time to Stop 00:05:59 The London Scene vs. The Welsh Countryside 00:07:49 Mark's Podcast Pivot: Breaking Out of the Interview Format 00:06:50 The Bookshelf Problem: Conformity in Podcasting 00:16:20 Introducing Useful, Not True: The Core Concept 00:20:09 Why All That Really Matters Are Your Actions 00:32:31 Religion as Actions, Not Beliefs 00:27:53 The Other Side of the River: Perspective Is Everything 00:30:15 Social Norms as Useful, Not True Beliefs 00:36:28 The Emotional Resistance to Questioning Your Beliefs 00:37:49 Against Authenticity: Why Your First Thought Is an Obstacle 00:38:42 Therapy Culture: When Private Concepts Go Public 00:42:37 The Pilot Analogy: Why We Want Some People to Lie 00:45:59 Optimistic Nihilism: The Joy of Nothing Meaning Anything 00:49:16 Everything Is Feelings: Why Emotions Are the Ultimate Metric 00:50:22 Optimizing for Happiness, Not Money 00:56:03 The Jordan Peterson Paradox: Brilliant Openings, Absolute Endings 01:03:37 Derek's Relationship Revelation: I Don't Want a Life Partner 01:07:25 The Biology Question: Should You Want What You're Supposed to Want? 01:08:07 Middle Age and Dating: Why Single Parents Check Out 01:20:26 The Companionship Paradox: Friends vs. Partners 01:21:23 Drew's Influence and the Coldplay Problem 01:23:15 The Closing: Changing Formats and Creative Courage ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Mar 26, 2025 · 47 minHow to Change Your Mind Without Losing Yourself
In this episode, Drew and I dive into some of the biggest beliefs we’ve shifted over the years—and what it actually looks like to change your mind. We talk about Drew’s evolving views on religion, why I’m way less convinced that people are as changeable as we like to believe, and why I think trauma might be getting a little too much airtime in the self-help world. We also get into the loneliness epidemic, the quiet power of community, and why so much of “personal growth” isn’t about becoming someone new—it’s about learning to work with who you already are. Leave a comment below about what you’ve changed your mind about—and enjoy. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: 72 Episodes and the Work Behind It 00:02:00 Why We Need to Change Our Minds More Often 00:03:14 Drew's Shifting View on Religion 00:04:33 The New Atheism Movement and Its Limitations 00:05:44 Religion's Benefits: Community, Service, and Local Focus 00:06:43 The Dogma Dilemma: Can You Have the Good Without the Bad? 00:13:06 The Feature Is the Bug: Why Religion Works So Well 00:17:54 Mark's Big Mind Change: People Are Less Malleable Than We Think 00:18:53 The Twin Studies and What They Revealed 00:21:06 What Actually Changes: Attitude, Not Identity 00:26:45 The Self-Acceptance Paradox 00:24:47 It's a Skill Issue, Not a Personality Issue 00:26:15 The Dangerous Desire to Become a New Person 00:30:41 Mark's Contrarian Take: Trauma Is Overrated 00:33:24 The Trauma Narrative as Cop-Out 00:35:18 Resilience: The Underrated Human Trait 00:37:55 Drew's Contrarian Take: Optimism About the Future 00:39:35 The Data on Human Progress 00:43:17 Climate Change and the Solutions-Create-Problems Cycle 00:46:35 Closing Wisdom: Keep an Open Mind ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Mar 19, 2025 · 1 hr 14 minLessons on Money, Success, and Fulfillment You Need to Hear (ft. Lewis Howes)
Lewis Howes is one of the most successful podcasters of all time—12 years, nearly 1,800 episodes, and countless interviews with world-class performers. But what’s even more interesting is how his definition of success has evolved over the years. In this conversation, Lewis opens up about shifting from a hyper-competitive, “be number one” mentality to a more collaborative, impact-driven approach. We also dive into emotional regulation, the surprising ways our relationship with money affects our lives, and why most people either idolize or demonize wealth. Oh, and Lewis casually mentions he’s training to compete in the Olympics in his 40s. No big deal. This episode is packed with insights on what it really means to live a fulfilling, abundant life—without losing your mind in the process. Lewis's new book, Make Money Easy: https://www.amazon.com/Make-Money-Easy-Financial-Freedom/dp/1401993931 Lewis's podcast, The School of Greatness: https://lewishowes.com/sogpodcast/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction and 12 Years of Podcasting 00:01:03 Redefining Greatness: From Competition to Collaboration 00:03:35 The Jealousy Trap and Learning to Celebrate Others 00:04:49 When Being Number One Isn't Enough 00:10:24 The School of Greatness: Creating Your Own Therapy 00:12:07 From Hypercompetitive Athlete to Emotionally Aware Human 00:13:51 Vision and Spatial Awareness: The Athletic Edge That Translates 00:16:07 Treating Life Like Sports: Coaches, Seasons, and Feedback 00:17:40 Greatness 101: The Essential Curriculum 00:18:53 Emotional Regulation: Healing Childhood Wounds 00:22:13 Gratitude and Generosity: The Gateway to Flourishing 00:25:15 The Money Book Nobody Else Wrote 00:26:48 Money Wounds and Money Stories 00:29:22 If Money Walked Through the Door: The Revealing Exercise 00:31:09 Growing Up With Money: Downplaying Success to Fit In 00:36:15 Why We Attach So Much Emotion to Money 00:37:28 Money and Self-Worth: The Dangerous Connection 00:38:52 Mark's Healthy Relationship With Money 00:40:49 Broke and Happy vs Rich and Miserable: The Four Quadrants 00:41:30 Living on a Couch: From Defeated to Empowered 00:44:44 Success Without Peace: Fighting Everyone at 30 00:46:07 Mark's Journey: From Friend's Couch to Subtle Art Success 00:47:11 Broke But Optimistic: Learning Skills and Building Momentum 00:48:57 When Massive Success Breaks Your Brain 00:50:56 The Psychological Adjustment to Sudden Wealth 00:52:25 When Friends and Family Get Weird About Your Money 00:54:08 The Generosity Paradox: When Giving Backfires 00:56:01 Quality of Life Equals Quality of Relationships 00:57:58 Getting Married: Doing Everything Opposite 00:59:06 Courageous Conversations and Early Therapy 01:01:05 The No Upset Agreement: Communicating Without Fighting 01:02:17 Have Serious Conversations Sooner in Relationships 01:03:59 The Olympic Dream: A 40-Year Journey 01:06:53 Showing Up Uninvited: The First Handball Practice 01:08:37 The Dream That Died and Came Back to Life 01:09:54 Paris 2024: Reactivating the Fire 01:10:39 Three and a Half Years to Go: The Marathon Begins 01:12:53 Ambitious Goals That Seem Slightly Unhinged ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Mar 12, 2025 · 1 hr 2 minMastering Resilience, AI’s Unstoppable Rise, and Can We Truly Change?
Resilience isn’t just about gritting your teeth and enduring pain—it’s about managing the stories you tell yourself. In this episode, I break down why most people get resilience wrong and how mastering the “second arrow” is the real key to bouncing back. We dive into post-traumatic growth, why caring about something bigger than yourself makes you stronger, and how focusing on what you can control changes everything. We also talk about AI—how it’s not here to save or destroy humanity, but it is going to change everything. We look at how AI is already transforming creative and knowledge-based jobs, why you should be using it right now, and what you can do to stay ahead. Plus, we tackle the ultimate question: Can people change? That three-word question is lot more complex than it seems. Check it out. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Have You Felt the AGI? 00:03:31 The Fuck of the Week: What Resilience Really Is 00:07:09 The Problem With Mental Health Apps 00:10:40 Five Ways to Build Real Resilience 00:19:56 The Novelty Addiction and Showing Up for Small Things 00:24:06 Brilliant or Bullshit: Will AI Doom or Save Humanity? 00:29:42 AI as a New Medium: Interactive Novels and Beyond 00:32:38 How to Actually Use AI: The Quality Input Problem 00:38:06 The New Scarcity: Where Humans Still Matter 00:43:50 Reader Question: Can People Change? 00:46:36 The Prerequisites for Change and the Codependency Trap 00:51:18 What Actually Counts as Change? 00:55:50 Personal Changes and the Slow Grind ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Mar 5, 2025 · 1 hrHow to Stop Letting Fear Control Your Life (ft. Dr. Julie Smith)
You know that voice in your head that loves to tell you that you suck? Yeah, that one. The one that compares you to everyone on Instagram, tells you you’re a failure for eating cereal at 11 p.m., and insists you’ll never get your life together. Well, today, we’re calling in a professional to deal with that assh*le. Dr. Julie Smith is a clinical psychologist and viral mental health educator who’s built a massive following by actually making psychology make sense. In this episode, she breaks down how to quiet that inner critic, stop getting crushed by comparison, and reframe your self-loathing into something a little more useful—like self-respect. We also dig into what it’s like to become internet famous when you’re an introvert, why emotions are not facts (even though they feel like they are), and how to stop letting social media, your parents, and your own bullsh*t beliefs define your worth. Whether you’re stuck in a shame spiral, wondering why life feels pointless, or just trying to figure out how to not hate yourself so much, this episode is for you. Dr. Julie’s new book, Open When: A Companion for Life's Twists & Turns: https://www.amazon.com/Open-When-Companion-Lifes-Twists-ebook/dp/B0D3CB1XX6 Dr. Julie’s first book, Why Has Nobody Told Me This Before?: https://www.amazon.com/Why-Nobody-Told-This-Before-ebook/dp/B0983L6T32 Follow Dr. Julie: https://www.youtube.com/@DrJulie https://www.instagram.com/drjulie https://www.tiktok.com/@drjulie https://x.com/drjuliesmith https://www.facebook.com/DrJulieSmith/ CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: That Voice in Your Head 00:01:13 The Social Media Paradox: Spreading Mental Health Advice Online 00:03:21 From Therapy Room to TikTok: An Accidental Journey 00:04:55 Internet Fame and the Introvert's Dilemma 00:07:01 Having Your Own Back: The Inner Coach Technique 00:09:50 The Investment Portfolio Approach to Identity 00:12:40 Social Comparison: A Strength Turned Upside Down 00:17:47 The Values Exercise: Finding What Actually Matters 00:20:48 The Whole Package: Envying Success Without the Sacrifice 00:22:58 Working With Military Trauma: What Humans Are Capable Of 00:25:32 You Have More Capacity to Cope Than You Think 00:27:33 Predator vs Prey: Facing a Cancer Diagnosis 00:30:23 Thriving Under Pressure: The Great Debate 00:31:42 The Loneliness Epidemic and Modern Barriers to Connection 00:35:02 Good Therapy, Bad Therapy: What to Look For 00:39:52 Modeling a Positive Ending: The Therapeutic Breakup 00:41:00 When Everything Feels Pointless: Nihilism and Meaning 00:44:01 Emotions Are Not Facts: The DBT Approach 00:46:05 Emotions as Weather: Clouds Will Pass 00:47:59 What Actually Matters: The People Right Next to You 00:50:02 When Your Parents Got It Wrong: The Adult-to-Adult Shift 00:53:34 The Healed Human Myth: Relationships Are Two Imperfect People 00:54:27 When You Hate Who You've Become: The Impossible Task of Pleasing Everyone 00:57:13 Emotions as Echoes of the Past 00:59:00 Liberation From Parental Approval: A Sign of Maturity 00:59:37 Closing: We're All Healed Now ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Feb 26, 2025 · 52 minHow to Fear Less, Spark More Creativity, and Choose Better Problems in Life
Fear of failure isn’t really about failure—it’s about what failure means to us. We’re not scared of messing up; we’re scared of being judged, embarrassed, or proving our worst insecurities right. But the people who actually succeed at anything are the ones willing to suck at it long enough to get good. Today, we break down why failure feels so terrifying, how social comparison messes with our heads, and why the loudest critics are usually the ones who’ve never done a damn thing themselves. Tune in for some practical tips on overcoming all of this. We also dig into the science of why boredom can spark better ideas, why our addiction to content might be making us less creative, and whether we should all do a digital detox before our brains turn into overstimulated mush. Finally, we wrap things up with a simple but profound question: If life is just an endless series of trade-offs, what are the best problems to have? Because problems never go away—you just get to level up to better ones. The Creative Benefits of Boredom: https://hbr.org/2014/09/the-creative-benefits-of-boredom CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: The Morning Workout Experiment That Failed 00:02:39 The Fuck of the Week: Fear of Failure 00:03:47 What You're Really Afraid Of: It's Not the Failure Itself 00:05:25 The Spotlight Effect: Nobody's Watching You Like You Think 00:09:35 Reframing Failure: You Have to Suck at Something First 00:11:43 Why Fear Is Really About Relationships 00:13:49 The Paradox of Cringe: Growth Requires Embarrassment 00:16:02 Five Tactics to Conquer Fear: Exposure Therapy and Beyond 00:22:43 Building an Identity Around Doing Hard Things 00:25:18 The Key Takeaway: Focus on Process Over Outcome 00:27:27 Brilliant Bullshit: Does Boredom Make You More Creative? 00:35:07 The Creativity Crisis: Why Art Feels Less Innovative 00:39:39 Practical Tips: How to Use Boredom to Boost Creativity 00:42:18 Reader Question: What Are the Best and Worst Problems to Have? 00:48:22 The Red Paperclip Story: Life as a Series of Trade-Offs 00:51:43 Wisdom of the Week: Mark's New Favorite Joke ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Feb 19, 2025 · 1 hr 16 minThe Unexpected Truth About Sex, Drugs, and Rock & Roll (ft. Randy Blythe)
Life in a rock band isn’t all sold-out shows and backstage parties—it’s a high-pressure, all-consuming commitment that tests friendships, sanity, and survival. In this episode, I sit down with Randy Blythe, legendary frontman of Lamb of God, to pull back the curtain on what it really takes to last in the music industry. From the brutal realities of band relationships to the myths of the rockstar lifestyle, Randy shares unfiltered insights on creativity, addiction, and personal transformation. We also dig into his journey to sobriety, the impact of punk rock’s DIY ethos, and the surprising ways today’s generation is redefining rebellion. Whether you’re a musician, a fan, or just someone navigating your own challenges, this conversation is a raw and inspiring look at resilience, reinvention, and the power of staying true to yourself. Randy’s books: Just Beyond the Light: https://www.amazon.com/Just-Beyond-Light-Making-Inside-ebook/dp/B0DJHMN7C1 Dark Days: https://www.amazon.com/Dark-Days-D-Randall-Blythe/dp/0306825090 CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: From Punk Rock to Prison 00:02:15 The Reality of Band Relationships 00:10:50 Discovering Punk Rock: The Sex Pistols Moment 00:15:19 The Cultural Evolution of Rebellion 00:19:00 Why Artists and Musicians Struggle with Addiction 00:22:30 Kurt Cobain and the Romanticism of Pain 00:30:17 October 17th, 2010: Randy's Last Day Drinking 00:37:04 The Brutal Reality of Getting Sober 00:25:44 Creativity After Sobriety 00:42:16 Balancing Two Extremes: Optimism and Nihilism 00:47:45 Why Metal Heads Are Actually the Nicest People 00:51:44 Arrested in Prague: The Nightmare Begins 00:55:42 37 Days in Pankrac Prison 01:00:26 The Artist's Mind in Crisis 00:58:34 Why Randy Went Back to Face Trial 01:06:27 Lessons from Prison: Perspective and Gratitude 01:10:13 Advice for Young Creatives: Practice and Don't Give a Fuck 01:12:51 The Reality Check: Beer Bottles and Middle Fingers ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Feb 12, 2025 · 52 minSnake Oil or Self-Help?, Minimalism’s Real Value, and Atheists Who Go to Church
Self-help is supposed to, you know, help. But what if, sometimes, it actually makes things worse? In this episode, we take a hard look at the self-improvement industry that promises transformation but often sells little more than feel-good illusions. From outdated advice that preys on your insecurities to the dopamine hit of "life-changing" content that changes nothing, we break down why self-help often fails the people who need it most. Along with unpacking the biggest traps of self-improvement, Drew and I also tackle whether or not minimalism was just an aesthetic rebellion against our parents’ McMansion dreams. We were both once staunch minimalists and we look back on what we learned and what principles still apply to our lives today. We wrap up with a listener question about the ethics of going to church if you’re an atheist. It’s another grab bag episode full of rabbit holes. Check it out. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: The Chair Situation and What's Coming 00:00:31 Five Problems with the Self-Help Industry 00:03:07 Bad to Okay vs. Okay to Great: Two Different Audiences 00:05:33 The Shame Trap: When Self-Help Makes You Feel Worse 00:07:41 The Codependency Problem and Who We're Really Helping 00:10:08 Self-Help as Avoidance: Learning vs. Doing 00:13:51 The Magic Bullet Myth: Unrealistic Marketing Expectations 00:17:06 The Science Problem: Replication Crisis and What Actually Works 00:18:29 Treating Yourself as an Experiment 00:22:29 The Self-Acceptance Paradox: Revisiting the Fifth Problem 00:25:15 Minimalism: Our Personal Journey 00:26:29 The Cultural Context: Why Minimalism Became a Trend 00:30:37 The Benefits and Downsides of Owning Less 00:34:07 Minimalism as Identity: The Status Symbol Problem 00:34:49 Sentimentality and Objects: When Things Matter 00:33:22 The Real Lesson: Anti-Consumerism, Not Minimalism 00:40:52 Listener Question: Can Atheists Go to Church? 00:44:21 The Church-Sized Hole in Society 00:49:22 Why Strict Beliefs Create Stronger Communities 00:51:30 Wisdom of the Week: Carl Rogers on Self-Acceptance ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Feb 5, 2025 · 1 hr 7 minAsk Mark Anything: Live from Australia
Australia, you absolute legends. Back in November, I did a speaking tour across seven cities, talking to thousands of you about life, purpose, relationships, and why giving fewer fucks is the key to actually living a life you don’t hate. We recorded some of the best Q&A moments to share with you here on the podcast. We diving into the big existential stuff—how to stop procrastinating, how to know if a relationship is right for you, and whether Australia’s ban on social media for kids is actually a good thing or not. We’ll also talk about the brutal truth behind imposter syndrome, how to stop caring so much about what other people think, and one thing that actually helps you figure out what the hell you should be doing with your life. Plus, I’ll share some hard-earned wisdom on drinking, quitting, and why people stay in bad relationships way too long. So if you’ve ever felt stuck, lost, or just overwhelmed by the sheer absurdity of life, this one’s for you. Hit play and let’s get into it. CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Live from Australia 00:02:00 Finding What Truly Matters in Life 00:03:46 The Real Reason We Procrastinate 00:07:27 Healing From Trauma: Rebuilding Trust in the World 00:09:46 The Experiment Framework: How Long to Try 00:13:19 Stop Caring What Others Think 00:14:43 Killing Old Versions of Yourself 00:16:35 The Secret to a Long-Term Successful Marriage 00:19:44 Relationship Uncertainty: Will They Come Back? 00:22:17 Bad Behavior and the 2024 Election 00:26:12 Trade-Offs With Outsized Returns 00:28:58 Parenting Advice: Raising Kids With Healthy Values 00:32:00 Turning Imposter Syndrome Into Motivation 00:34:03 Relationship Expectations: What You Deserve 00:35:39 The Problem With Too Much Empathy 00:39:00 Australia's Social Media Ban for Kids Under 16 00:40:53 Life Advice for a 16-Year-Old 00:42:47 Escaping Analysis Paralysis 00:44:41 Caring Too Much at 15: Social Pressure at School 00:47:19 Staying Relevant in the Age of AI 00:49:23 The Paradox of Good People Who Don't Feel Good 00:51:35 Stop Searching for Purpose: Make It Instead 00:54:41 When Support Becomes a Prison 00:57:47 Overcoming Failure After Failure 01:00:37 Finding Hope When the World Feels Depressing 01:04:40 Death, Grief, and Memento Mori ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Jan 29, 2025 · 1 hr 11 minHow to Build a Life Full of Meaning and Purpose (ft. Arthur Brooks)
Today, I sit down with Arthur Brooks, a renowned social scientist and happiness expert, for a deep dive into the realms of meaning, faith, and love. Our conversation takes unexpected turns as we explore the intersection of spirituality, psychology, and personal growth. From discussing the evolutionary roots of our search for meaning to examining the role of faith in modern life, this episode challenges conventional wisdom and offers fresh perspectives on age-old questions. We cover a wide range of topics, including the importance of boredom in fostering creativity, the dangers of political activism as a substitute for religion, and the keys to a successful marriage. Arthur shares insights from his work with the Dalai Lama, explains why young men are increasingly turning to religion, and offers advice on finding meaning in a world dominated by technology. Whether you're grappling with questions of faith, seeking to understand the nature of love, or simply looking for ways to live a more fulfilling life, this conversation will leave you with plenty to ponder and explore further. Arthur’s latest book with Oprah Winfrey: Build the Life You Want: https://www.amazon.com/Build-Life-You-Want-Science-ebook/dp/B0C38FCTJC All of Arthur’s books: https://www.amazon.com/stores/Arthur-C.-Brooks/author/B001HOU7RE Arthur’s online workshop: https://www.scienceofhappier.com/ Arthur’s newsletter: https://arthurbrooks.com/newsletter Arthur’s column in The Atlantic: https://www.theatlantic.com/projects/how-build-life/ Follow Arthur: https://www.instagram.com/arthurcbrooks/ https://www.facebook.com/ArthurBrooks/ https://x.com/arthurbrooks https://www.tiktok.com/@arthurcbrooks CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Two Former Musicians Walk Into a Studio 00:00:45 The Super Striver Kid: When Ambition Replaces Meaning 00:03:38 The Identity Trap: When You Become What You Do 00:06:36 The Evolutionary Tension: Acclaim vs. Meaning 00:08:43 The Limbic System vs. The Prefrontal Cortex 00:11:55 The Meaning Crisis: When Your Life Feels Pointless 00:13:08 The Boredom Solution: Why You Need to Be Bored More 00:15:34 Coherence vs. Chaos: The Information Abundance Problem 00:17:19 The Default Mode Network: Where Your Best Ideas Come From 00:18:29 Leisure as Meaning: Joseph Pieper and Structured Downtime 00:21:50 The Rise of Religiosity: Bible Sales and the Hunger for Depth 00:24:45 Young Men and the Meaning Crisis: Why Gender Divergence Is Happening 00:26:28 The Domestication Problem: Men at 30 and Substance Abuse 00:27:38 Church as the New Dating App: Why It's Getting Cool Again 00:28:45 The Genetic Component: Why People Return to Childhood Religion 00:30:26 Mark's Religious Journey: From Resentful Atheist to Intellectually Curious 00:33:57 The Emotional Relationship Fallacy: Why You Don't Need Certainty 00:35:29 Meaning Comes From Understanding, Not Answers 00:37:10 The Tangible vs. The Abstract: Is God Like Your Wife? 00:42:29 Neti Neti and the Via Negativa: Defining God by What It's Not 00:43:23 Transcendence: The Secret to Happiness 00:45:00 The Dalai Lama and the Earthrise Photo: Getting Small 00:47:25 The I Self vs. The Me Self: Where We Spend Our Attention 00:48:45 Childish Spirituality vs. Mature Faith: What Healthy Religion Looks Like 00:49:46 Politics as Substitute Religion: The Dark Side of Activism 00:50:34 Love and Contemplation: The Two Pillars of Healthy Religion 00:52:18 Fitness Cults and Marketing Religiosity: Missing the Point 00:53:35 Toxic Family vs. Political Schism: When to Cut People Off 00:56:33 Dark Triad Political Activists: How to Spot a Cult Leader 00:59:45 Virtual Cults: Why Internet Extremism Is Weaker Than You Think 01:01:39 Startups vs. Mergers: Why Most Successful Marriages Begin Young 01:02:20 The Hive Mind Marriage: Why Separate Bank Accounts Are Problematic 01:04:30 Men Fall Apart Alone: The Gender Divide in Singleness 01:05:44 Companionate Love: Your Spouse as Your Best Friend 01:07:25 The Spiritual Journey Together: Lewis and Clark Looking for the Pacific 01:08:59 Marriage Blindsided Me: The Permanence I Feared Became the Benefit 01:10:34 The Divorce Rate Myth: Your Odds Are Better Than You Think ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Jan 22, 2025 · 50 minBuilding Real Confidence, The Motivation Puzzle, and Understanding All Your “Parts”
Drew comes in hot today as we dig into the nitty gritty of confidence and motivation. We explore the counterintuitive idea that true confidence doesn't come from expecting success, but from being comfortable with failure. If you've ever struggled with self-doubt or felt demotivated despite external achievements, this episode might just change your perspective. We start by dissecting what I call the "Confidence Conundrum" and how it applies to various aspects of life, from business to relationships. Then, we challenge some long-held beliefs about intrinsic and extrinsic motivation, discussing research that questions the idea that external rewards always undermine our natural interests. We wrap up with a thought-provoking exploration of Internal Family Systems theory and how understanding the different "parts" of our psyche can lead to greater self-integration. This is a grab bag episode that we had a lot of fun with, so I hope you enjoy it CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Drew Comes In Hot 00:01:29 The Confidence Conundrum Explained 00:04:02 Why External Success Doesn't Create Confidence 00:06:04 The Delusion Question: Startup Founders vs. High Earners 00:08:01 Why Affirmations and External Self-Improvement Fail 00:10:35 Being Comfortable With What You Lack 00:15:47 The Rejection Story: How Mark Met His Wife 00:18:51 The Route to Positivity Runs Through Negativity 00:20:07 Brilliant or Bullshit: The Motivation Puzzle 00:22:21 Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Motivation Defined 00:24:25 Philip Pokes Holes in Motivation Theory 00:28:47 The Laboratory Problem: Are We Measuring What We Think? 00:34:37 Rewards as Distractions, Not Demotivators 00:36:35 Two Different Activities: The Woodworking Example 00:38:32 The Takeaway: When External Rewards Change the Game 00:39:56 Question of the Week: Understanding Your Parts 00:41:01 How Parts Work: The Conservative Family vs. Sex Worker Example 00:43:26 Drew's Personal Experience: Anxious vs. Avoidant Parts 00:45:55 The Professional vs. Personal Self 00:47:05 Why Parts Work Finally Caught On 00:49:40 Wisdom of the Week: Ralph Waldo Emerson ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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Jan 15, 2025 · 53 minHow to Take Back Your Own Mind (ft. Tim Urban)
Today, I'm joined by my old friend Tim Urban, the mastermind behind the wildly popular blog Wait But Why. Known for his ability to break down complex topics with humor and stick-figure drawings, Tim has captured the attention of millions worldwide. From his early days as a blogger to the release of his first book, "What's Our Problem?: A Self-Help Book for Societies," Tim has consistently delivered thought-provoking content that challenges our understanding of the world around us. In this episode, we dive into pressing issues like unfettered tribalism, the concept of "idea prisons," and the potential impact of AI on society. Tim also shares personal insights as a new parent and teases his upcoming book. It'll challenge your perspectives and leave you craving more of Tim's signature blend of depth, wit, and accessibility. Don't miss this captivating conversation that tackles the complexities of our modern world head-on. Tim’s blog: Wait, But Why?: https://waitbutwhy.com/ Tim’s book: What’s Our Problem: https://www.amazon.com/Whats-Our-Problem-Self-Help-Societies-ebook/dp/B0BTJCTR58 Follow Tim: https://www.instagram.com/timurban https://x.com/waitbutwhy https://www.facebook.com/waitbutwhy CHAPTERS Chapters 00:00:00 Introduction: Tim Urban and Why Everyone Lost Their Minds 00:02:04 The Idea Prison Test: What Have You Changed Your Mind About? 00:03:00 Democrats, Republicans, and the Noun Prison 00:04:01 Sports Tribalism vs. Political Tribalism 00:05:33 How Tim Escaped His Own Idea Prison 00:07:15 Religion, Atheism, and the Wisdom Tim Missed 00:09:49 The Vertical vs. Horizontal Distinction in Politics 00:11:57 Are We Past Peak Tribalism? 00:12:31 Historical Patterns: The Red Scare and Salem Witch Trials 00:13:24 When the Primitive Mind Takes Over 00:14:59 The Wokeness Wave: A Crazy Thing That Happened 00:16:44 Social Media: The Root Cause That Remains 00:18:50 The Environmental Shift: New Media, New Power Dynamics 00:20:10 Developing Antibodies: Why It Takes a Generation 00:21:49 Mad Men and the Low-Hanging Fruit of New Media 00:23:02 Evolution, Power Vacuums, and the Iron Age Analogy 00:25:15 The Follower Economy and Algorithm Incentives 00:26:47 AI: The Next Cycle Before We've Finished This One 00:28:30 Will AI Solve or Worsen Our Information Problem? 00:30:30 The Alien Attack Solution and Productive Tribalism 00:31:56 When Information Becomes Universal and Free 00:32:57 Democracy, Facts, and the Will of the People 00:34:44 MSNBC, Fox News, and the Misinformation Business Model 00:36:10 The Three Tiers of Tribalism 00:37:20 When National Threats Disappear 00:38:30 Latin America, the Middle East, and Tribalism Geography 00:41:32 Parenthood: The Massive Pile of Pros and Cons 00:42:29 Pure Love and Low IQ Company 00:46:27 The Temporary Loss of Freedom 00:47:59 The History of Everything: Tim's Next Book 00:48:56 The Hell of Book Writing and the Freedom of Not ⇨ Sign up for my newsletter, Your Next Breakthrough. It will help make you a less awful person: https://markmanson.net/breakthrough ⇨ Get clarity on what actually matters. Try Purpose, Mark's AI mentor app that learns your patterns, challenges your blind spots, and helps you take action. Get started at https://bit.ly/4w46FMH FOLLOW MARK Mark's IG: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson Solved IG: https://www.instagram.com/solvedpodcast/ Twitter: https://x.com/markmanson LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/markmanson/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@IAmMarkManson Theme Song: Icarus Lives by @Periphery , used with permission from Periphery.
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