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Works Every Time

Works Every Time

The WET Podcast: Monday's with Justin Essenmacher, Markus Olind, & Phillip Garcia (prod. JJ)

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  • 25 episodes
  • weekly
  • Avg 1 hr 6 min
  • English

Episodes 25

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  • S3 · E143
    Monday · 1 hr 23 min

    Are Michigan the Biggest Cheaters in Football?

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://modernstoa.co/podcast-studio-austin-bookings/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:01:06 Markus' frat days 00:04:41 Skull and Bones & secret societies 00:13:45 Why is Justin upset this week? 00:15:32 Michigan's miracle 00:24:56 What's the point of refs? 00:28:07 If the Lions or Cowboys win the Superbowl, we're getting tattoos 00:32:02 Justin's application for Yell 00:36:21 Justin's Jamboree: '90s week 00:41:46 Were the Hanson brothers really brothers? 00:44:58 Markus comes from Big Sticker 00:47:47 98 Degrees: band or bathwater? 00:52:49 Markus phones a friend 00:56:47 Steve Harvey's catch phrase 01:07:12 Bit Pitch: live from London 01:21:28 Comment your questions for Justin's Jamboree ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E142
    September 14 · 1 hr 12 min

    Welcome to Sexist Roadhouse (feat. Michael Ridley)

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://modernstoa.co/podcast-studio-austin-bookings/ FOLLOW MICHAEL https://www.instagram.com/ridleysweaty/ https://www.youtube.com/@MichaelRidleyComedy THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:25 C*m on your mustache 00:02:19 Ridley's Mexican stepdad 00:06:12 Justin becomes Houston 00:09:33 Sexist Roadhouse 00:17:52 There's whispers of Epstein all over Florida 00:24:27 Cars be snitching these days 00:27:09 AI pranks 00:29:08 The shower caveman experiment 00:31:32 Booger Burger 00:35:42 Yamaha rules 00:37:42 ADHD, hecklers, and staying in the bit 00:42:40 The venue forgot the comedy show 00:47:26 Bit Pitch 01:08:42 Siri responds faster to Indian accent 01:10:31 Indian Hootie and the Blowfish on the paywall ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @MichaelRidleyComedy #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E141
    September 7 · 1 hr 4 min

    Everyone Should Be Allowed to Drink at Work

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://modernstoa.co/podcast-studio-austin-bookings/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:03:00 Everybody drinks at work apparently 00:11:47 Accidental reverse prank call 00:14:44 Bring back regulated work beer 00:17:30 Markus' succc power ruins our vapes 00:20:01 Also bring back cigs at work 00:22:42 Roofers should be drunk 00:25:36 Justin's jamboree 00:38:51 Post-game press conferences 00:45:36 What's going on with Markus 00:52:23 Markus stirs beef 00:57:46 Everything Phil does in a week ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E140
    August 31 · 1 hr 2 min

    Our Gameshow Gets Political

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://modernstoa.co/podcast-studio-austin-bookings/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:50 Jargon 00:03:35 Don't f**k with foam rollers 00:09:37 Why are Germans like this? 00:15:02 Phil's Phinancial Advice 00:22:13 Markus' Dino of the Week 00:30:37 Should Markus start drinking again? 00:36:03 intermission 00:37:52 Justin's Jamboree ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E139
    August 24 · 1 hr 2 min

    Dinosaurs, Star Wars, and Anne Hathaway (The Perfect Movie)

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://modernstoa.co/podcast-studio-austin-bookings/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:01:34 New dino movie is great (unless you're Justin) 00:13:11 Justin's new segment 00:41:22 Football is back 00:47:23 Bit Pitch gets Miami WET ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E138
    August 17 · 1 hr 7 min

    The DMT Dimension is CLOSED

    SEE MARKUS & JUSTIN The Green Room Friday 8/21, 8 - 11pm 13201 Pond Springs Rd #105A, Austin, TX 78729, USA https://www.eventbrite.com/e/tokes-n-jokes-with-markus-olind-tickets-1997772232526?aff=oddtdtcreator&fbclid=IwY2xjawTqGnVwZG9mAWV4dG4DYWVtAjEwAGJyaWQRMVlNWm1EeG9yZUdVNUF3WVlzcnRjBmFwcF9pZBAyMjIwMzkxNzg4MjAwODkyAAEem4wybFDLd5zh8l0At_3gxsE6oFOGN2dcBVgBcYWh-bsH7x1cVVy7r4RtEZk_aem_0zcBN857mLQRmMGUSc1xCw MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:40 Last CD you listened to in your car 00:04:40 Arena rock at the dentist's office 00:08:14 Everything is a parody of a parody 00:11:23 Wasting water on stupid questions 00:17:19 The Sun isn't real and China doesn't have a billion people 00:30:34 Phil's India phase 00:36:40 The DMT dimension is closed 00:43:00 Markus hates Christmas in July 00:50:07 Why dogs love baby poop 00:53:44 There's no jokes left 00:56:48 Bit Pitch 01:03:42 Reverse cowgirling the toilet ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E137
    August 10 · 1 hr 5 min

    The War on Drugs is BACK ON!

    SEE MARKUS & JUSTIN The Green Room Friday 8/21, 8 - 11pm 13201 Pond Springs Rd #105A, Austin, TX 78729, USA https://www.thegreenroom-austin.com/event-details/tokes-n-jokes-with-markus-olind-2026-08-21-20-00 SAUNA COMEDY SHOW Bathe Austin Saturday 8/15, 8-10pm 2922 East Cesar Chavez Street, Austin, TX https://sweatpals.com/event/wet-comedy-show-pyra-social-sauna-fdf620?utm_source=host_widget&utm_medium=embed&utm_campaign=host_769a79ca-3528-4b2c-8937-534221821150 JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:33 Clowning 00:05:47 Thank god w*ed is dangerous again 00:17:50 Justin's spectacular bowling injury 00:26:22 Breast health (feat. a woman) 00:31:01 Bit Pitch 00:48:46 Last year this week 00:50:53 Denzel is the perfect actor 00:55:22 Cliff hangers suck ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S4 · E136
    August 3 · 57 min

    Pleading the 5th, and why Chicago sucks

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:02:07 Phills trip to Chicago 00:07:00 Small World friendships 00:08 Unexpected Drinking 00:10:20 Why Chicago Sucks 00:20:10 Monster Trucks events over other events game 00:23:00 NASCAR explained 00:25:00 where do NASCAR drivers pee? 00:30:16 Calling NASCAR for ticket pricing 00:41:00 Phill witnesses a Terrorist announcement in the airport 00:43:00 learning how to say White guy in other languages 00:43:40 explaining Harry Potter and JK Rawling 00:49:27 Dr. Fauci and Covid pleading the 5th 00:55:00 Phill knows something we don't ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E135
    July 27 · 1 hr 9 min

    Our Pitch for a WNBA Team in Austin (feat. Fuzzy Khilji)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets!https://www.jokewrldfest.com/(we will not be there but you should go)MERCHhttps://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-timeTEJAS TONICSupport us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order!https://www.tejastonic.com/RECORD WHERE WE DOUse code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording!https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6FOLLOW FUZZY:https://www.instagram.com/fuzzycomic/THE WET COMMANDMENTS1) No Austin comedy2) We don't hate women2c) Don't say c*nt3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive4) Be funny5) Have fun (respectfully)______________________________________00:00:00 This week on WET…00:01:19 Beating your older siblings at games00:06:45 Justin's first 300 bowling00:09:58 White Islam is coming00:21:04 What makes a good man in 202600:27:40 Austin needs a WNBA team00:39:08 Best women's sports00:45:50 Bit Pitch LIVE from US Bank Stadium00:58:00 Leaving parties early01:01:21 Sports should be free______________________________________Follow the show:https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcasthttps://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcasthttps://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401chttps://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcastJustin:https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustinhttps://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacherMarkus:https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/Phillip:https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedyProduction:Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @fuzzykhilji #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E134
    July 20 · 1 hr 7 min

    Romaine Calm and Don't Eat Lettuce (feat. yonderwizzerd)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW YONDER: https://www.youtube.com/@yonderwizzerd https://www.instagram.com/yonderwizzerd/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:36 South Caroline is bad at naming boys 00:05:43 How Yonder started opening Secret Show 00:11:17 Romaine calm and don't eat lettuce 00:14:12 In Memoriam: Sam Neill 00:26:44 Looking at pictures of Phil's ass 00:30:33 The great cheese debate 00:35:28 Yonder's hair secret 00:41:03 Yonder's rich heritage 00:46:34 Europeans discovering ranch 00:48:32 Bit Pitch ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @yonderwizzerd #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E133
    July 13 · 1 hr 4 min

    The Algorithm Made Us Cry

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:03:28 It's hot 00:08:10 The aftermath of 4th of July case race 00:14:22 Would you purge? 00:18:16 We found the real Love Island 00:24:13 4 midg*ts race a camel 00:25:05 FIFA red card scandal 00:29:10 The failed 250 state fair 00:36:31 Bit Pitch @ the 249th P Terry's 00:46:07 Jew or Goy? 00:48:14 An interview with Phillip Garcia 00:51:38 Justin saw a zombie 00:53:59 Phil's Larry David moment 00:57:02 Technology bad ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E133
    July 6 · 56 min

    The Brotherhood of the Travelling Joke

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW COLT: https://www.instagram.com/probablycolt/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:02:21 The brotherhood of the travelling joke 00:05:48 Helping Markus deal with the loss 00:17:55 Shoes on or off? 00:22:06 Justin's big break: Famous Footwear 00:27:50 Phil's bad jobs 00:31:21 R*tarded Rambo 00:35:18 Drinking on the 4th of july 00:43:13 Markus best Edward 40 Hands ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E131
    June 29 · 59 min

    Squirrels Are Evil | WET x SKMP

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW SKY: https://skmp.supercast.com/ https://www.instagram.com/iamaskyking/ https://www.youtube.com/@skykingsmentalplayground THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:02:09 Has Clavicular maxxed out? 00:06:29 Examining our genes 00:13:07 Our predictions came true 00:25:42 Markus has upgraded his life 00:32:44 Squirrel (and bird) corner 00:40:19 Mexicanmaxxing 00:43:40 Is this bullying? 00:46:09 Getting dark and deep ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @skykingsmentalplayground #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E130
    June 23 · 1 hr 5 min

    UFC at the White House was Weird (feat. Ramin)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW RAMIN: https://www.instagram.com/ramincomic/ https://www.youtube.com/@ramincomic THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:02:23 Markus went to the Germany game 00:19:45 UFC at the White House was weird 00:29:11 Weenier dogs are vicious 00:33:06 Living in your car 00:38:51 Ramin's experiment 00:54:08 Live, laugh, love ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @ramincomic #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E129
    June 15 · 51 min

    Moonshine and Pasture Parties (feat. Mason Smith)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW MASON: https://www.instagram.com/masonsmithcomedian/ https://www.youtube.com/@masonsmithcomedy https://www.patreon.com/cw/masonsmithcomedy THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:42 Shout out the mom's of comedy 00:05:59 Addressing the haters 00:09:22 Moonshine and pasture parties 00:14:11 Is jungle juice racist? 00:16:34 Phil has been to joe exotics ranch 00:21:20 Birthday roasts 00:25:57 Markus' car is an experiment at this point 00:30:06 Mason wants to be a vampire 00:32:57 Scientology is a pyramid scheme 00:37:27 Lego scandal is Kony 2012 of today 00:44:07 We got Mason Chris Hansen for his birthday ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @masonsmithcomedy #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E128
    June 8 · 1 hr 11 min

    We've Been Maxxing Our Whole Lives

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ (we will not be there but you should go) MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:28 Clock in, lock in 00:04:22 Justin's been maxxing his whole life 00:08:24 Weinermaxxing 00:18:54 Futuremaxxing 00:22:19 Vegasmaxxing 00:29:34 Deltamaxxing 00:35:34 Dubaimaxxing 00:37:38 Bitmaxxing 00:50:35 TimeTravelmaxxing 00:54:54 Cigmaxxing 00:57:04 Nostalgiamaxxing 01:03:29 Siblingmaxxing ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E127
    June 1 · 1 hr 27 min

    Fears and Ghost Stories (feat. Brent Reed)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW BRENT: https://www.instagram.com/brentreedcomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@SpookyFunTime THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:37 Why is there 2 Justin's right now? 00:09:59 Scaring Markus 00:14:25 DMT is supernatural 00:25:07 People who are too into horror 00:29:26 What scares you in horror movies 00:32:09 The Collector and The Strangers 00:35:39 Every movie is a horror movie 00:37:10 Goosebumps is a gateway drug 00:39:38 Getting jaded by horror tropes 00:44:51 **Spoilers for Good Boy (Norwegian)** 00:53:22 Phil's ghost encounter 01:02:30 Justin's ghost encounter 01:03:40 Comedians on shrooms getting scared 01:06:45 Near death experiences 01:18:13 What scares you about yourself 01:21:25 Our favorite Halloween costumes ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @SpookyFunTime #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E126
    May 25 · 1 hr 7 min

    We're Already China (feat. Kurt Metzger)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026 Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets! https://www.jokewrldfest.com/ MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW KURT: https://www.instagram.com/kurtmetzgercomedy/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:00:50 Kurt knows pyramids 00:05:58 Mormons made hanta 00:08:17 Mormons are feds and UFO's 00:14:39 In 1492 Turkey saved a bunch of Jews 00:24:25 Are nukes really that bad? 00:29:06 America won the roast of Kevin Hart 00:32:50 Women Talking 00:36:03 Interdimensional sex tourists 00:45:03 We're already China 00:51:19 Chinese robo-cops 00:54:55 Climate change is done 00:58:44 Mystics are always sus 01:03:53 Weed makes you unprogrammable ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @kurtmetzgercomedy #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E125
    May 18 · 1 hr 3 min

    The TRUTH About the Roast of Kevin Hart (feat. Joke WRLD)

    JOKE WRLD COMEDY FESTEVAL 2026Use code 'WETPOD' for 5% off tickets!https://www.jokewrldfest.com/MERCHhttps://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-timeTEJAS TONICSupport us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order!https://www.tejastonic.com/RECORD WHERE WE DOUse code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording!https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6FOLLOW JAKE:https://www.instagram.com/joke.wrld/https://www.youtube.com/@JokeWRLDTHE WET COMMANDMENTS1) No Austin comedy2) We don't hate women2c) Don't say c*nt3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive4) Be funny5) Have fun (respectfully)______________________________________00:00:00 This week on WET…00:00:40 Jake comes in hot00:07:02 Beef squashed00:10:22 Dave Chappelle's Summer Camp00:14:13 Louis CK leaks00:16:47 Comedy is mainstream00:18:33 Busboys: A New Hope00:22:28 Politics at the Kevin Hart Roast00:27:41 Lizzo crushed it00:30:56 How to make a Joke WRLD video00:34:07 Sports Center of comedy00:37:24 Jake's throwing a comedy festival00:43:26 Joke WRLD is just facts00:50:20 Getting bumped at the Hans Kim van mic00:57:22 Jake fumbled his Ron White interview______________________________________Follow the show:https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcasthttps://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcasthttps://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401chttps://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcastJustin:https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustinhttps://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacherMarkus:https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/Phillip:https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedyProduction:Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass @JokeWRLD #podcast #comedy

  • S3 · E124
    May 12 · 1 hr 3 min

    Golfologist Explains Best Substance to Golf On (feat. Brent Gill)

    MERCH https://www.backoftheroomtees.com/collections/w-e-t-podcast-works-every-time TEJAS TONIC Support us by using code 'WETPOD' for 15% off your order! https://www.tejastonic.com/ RECORD WHERE WE DO Use code 'ATX' for 10% off your first recording! https://podcaststudioaustin.as.me/schedule/33cd53b6 FOLLOW BRENT: https://www.instagram.com/iambrentgill/ https://www.instagram.com/holehecklers/ https://www.instagram.com/goodsession.comedy/ THE WET COMMANDMENTS 1) No Austin comedy 2) We don't hate women 2c) Don't say c*nt 3) If you get too negative you have to say something positive 4) Be funny 5) Have fun (respectfully) ______________________________________ 00:00:00 This week on WET… 00:01:26 Feet pics on Patreon 00:04:53 The Study of Omelets 00:06:29 Brent is a golfologist 00:12:26 Why can't we have drugs in sports 00:15:44 Lizzo ruined the flute 00:19:15 Drinking at work 00:24:33 Volkswagen's numbers were exaggerated 00:32:58 Markus wants to live at a Champs 00:37:01 Brent mixed up black guys twice 00:43:13 Justin got Markus a gift 00:47:55 Bit Pitch LIVE @ the Sydney Opera House ______________________________________ Follow the show: https://www.patreon.com/cw/WETPodcast https://www.youtube.com/@wet.podcast https://open.spotify.com/show/7MqegWxm0vo9xV2y2OIatY?si=3cb91ff1b5ab401c https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/works-every-time/id1737857027 https://www.instagram.com/wet.podcast/ https://www.tiktok.com/@wet.podcast Justin: https://www.instagram.com/justinessenmacher/ https://www.tiktok.com/@openmicjustin https://www.youtube.com/@JustinEssenmacher Markus: https://www.instagram.com/beardvonmarkus/ Phillip: https://www.instagram.com/phillipgarciacomedy/ https://www.youtube.com/@phillipgarciacomedy Production: Contact - https://www.instagram.com/rageqzb/ Portfolio - https://www.youtube.com/@rageqzbass ​⁠​⁠ @phillipgarciacomedy ​ @JustinEssenmacher ​⁠​⁠ @markusolind9761 ​⁠​ @rageqzbass #podcast #comedy

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