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Going Terribly

Alice and Doug

Imagine the most adult children you know – discussing the environmental impact of menstruation cups one minute and making poop jokes the next. That’s Doug and that’s Alice. Two friends who decided to Always Be Recording. He’s a filmmaker, and she’s a college English professor. Their chemistry is accidental. And so is this auditory compendium of their verbal musings.

You are invited to join their lighthearted conversational romps through all of life's absurdities.

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26 episodes
weekly
Avg 53 min
English

Episodes 26

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#319
Tuesday · 1 hr 9 min
Ep. 319: Two 120-Pound Boomerangs in a Mobile Baptism Service
Today is Alice’s birthday! Enjoy some tailor-made games meant just for the birthday girl! You’ll get the music history test of “Original Song Lyrics." That's followed up with the trivia phenomenon “Which Alice Was It?” Finally, the classic “Semi-Recent Semi-Decent News” returns with some of the most semi-recent stories you’ve ever heard. And at least a few bodily functions in there for good measure. Obviously. Join all of Alice’s birthday fun now! Other discussion topics may include: - Detached malevolence - Can you live in an eagle’s nest over the Pacific Ocean? - If cicadas were the size of elephants we’d all drown - Fermented fragaria - How would you like to be mayor of Hell? You can!
#318
November 3 · 44 min
Ep. 318: Two Space Poop Vacuums in a Wall of Buttered Crackers
Do you know what really grinds Alice’s gears? Do you know what really lubes her up? You can find out both in this episode. And neither is dirty at all! Though you might not want to ask her why she’s been spending so much time in her car lately. Other discussion topics may include: - Do you think you could be in the room when someone else is pooping? - The terminal of the C - Laboratory meat - Proper trash bag puffing etiquette - What if your butt isn’t compatible with space?
#317
October 27 · 2 hr
Ep. 317: Three Civil War Moon Sharks in a Thrice-Failed Utopia
Halloween means Kevin Roach is in the house! It also means Poop Fairies, learning about the DNA in different biological fluids, and…murder via sexual exhaustion? Also, at two hours, it's the longest episode of Going Terrorly (er, Terribly) ever! And it’s definitely one for the (very spoopy) books. Other discussion topics may include: - Bidet evangelism - Boobies in Titanic, and other film twists - Mrs. Einstein Doubtfire- Plasticized body parts - Tears for Smears
#316
October 20 · 48 min
Ep. 316: Two Gigantic Fluffin' Mushrooms in an Old Spice Factory
Alice and Doug took a trip to the city now formerly known as Indianapolis a few weeks ago. They took in some comedy shows, a big-name play, and a trip to the zoo! And, of course, some great food spots. Including a barrage of food! Or Borage. Whatever. But the hold-your-breath moment in the episode comes when Alice reveals she may, somehow, some way, be getting tired of…7 Brew? Of course this sounds ridiculous. You’ll have to listen to see how that shakes out. Other Discussion Topics May Include - Why are there still open fields? - Dr. Pepper allergies - Sometimes a man just needs to be pet. - Free thinking vs. Conspiracy theories - Buckets of bread
#315
October 13 · 46 min
Ep. 315: Two Reverse Burgers in a World War II Banana Shortage
So, where were we? Alice and Doug pick up where they left off last week with some more much needed educating on topics such as “What are the grossest words in the English language?” and “Why does Hostess make all their cakes sound filthy?” There’s also a reveal that, believe it or not, Going Terribly is in the top 0.05% of a particular statistic in ALL of podcasts. It’s actually pretty cool to be honest! Other Discussion Tops May Include: - Space poops - Unanswered questions about Curious George - Disproving Chinese stereotype jokes - Explaining snowballs to the uninitiated - Do you get an extra party if you’re extra born?
#314
October 6 · 46 min
Ep. 314: Two Pork Pie Hats in a Vulcanization Process
It's National Mad Hatter Day! A celebration of...when people would wear hats filled with mercury and start going a little bit crazy? Maybe? Alice and Doug clearly have their hats on in this episode because it gets weird in a hurry. But they also seek to educate this week with the monthly "It Went Terribly" segment. Whether they are successful or not is anyone's guess, but the attempt is there. Other discussion topics may include: - Phasing out licks and sticks - The economic benefits of digging one's own grave - Mixing up Michael Jordan and Howdy Doody - You can't always get a bass clarinet - Hit songs about Olympic figure skater Elvis Stojko
#313
September 29 · 42 min
Ep. 313: Two Fast Food Ringleaders in a Mid-Adam Festival
Alice and Doug recently celebrated Mid-Autumn Festival by shopping for and carefully preparing authentic Chinese dishes. But first, they celebrated National Cheeseburger Day by sitting at a burger joint for over an hour waiting for a Handful of Gentlemen (ahem) to present them with their meals. It’s all about experiencing a variety of cultures. Like, pirates are in here, too. You’ll see. Other discussion topics - Full cornea contacts - How often do you secretly record people in public? - Pig flavored gum - Measuring time in boats of peanuts - Couch writing: Inventive or destructive?
#312
September 22 · 1 hr 31 min
Ep. 312: Four Firm, Tasty Males in an Epic 16-Minute Narrative Song
SIX YEARS. This podcast has had a new episode every single Tuesday for SIX YEARS. Can you believe it? This time around, Doug and Alice welcome returning guest William (will.he.is) and first-time guest Stephanie Osborne (FINALLY) to the podcast for games, chit chats, and jolly good times. And neither of them brings anything iron on this, the Iron Anniversary. Again, CAN YOU BELIEVE IT? Still a great time though! You know, all things considered, what with the lack of iron and all. Other discussion topics may include: - Did you know deer kept diaries? - Grandmas love Charlie Sheen - Weird Als and Weird AIs - The hit podcast “Alice Loves Anagrams” - Maybe it’s the Toblerone Anniversary?
#311
September 15 · 46 min
Ep. 311: Two Time Traveling Rednecks in an Animal Husbandry Simulator
To celebrate yesterday's National Video Games Day, Doug and Alice play "Is This a Game To You?" To celebrate yesterday's National Day of Encouragement, they're a little extra nice to each other. Even if Alice doesn't like linguine, pizza, or a certain Bedrockian children's vitamin. And even if Doug has too many hot takes about vegan food lines. To celebrate today, they've been listening to "Amber" during their downtime.* Other discussion topics may include: - Eggs that have not been chickified yet - Orangutanese poetry - The misleading nature of double cheeseburgers - Are there professional tambourine players? - Random Goo *You get it.
#310
September 8 · 53 min
Ep. 310: Two Caffeinated Lollipops in a Breakfast at Tympany's
Alice has a band gig coming up this weekend and also has another musical announcement to make on this week's episode! Here's a hint: it rhymes with Dorkestra. Doug takes us on a flavor parade through the streets of New Yum City, featuring blueberries, chicken, and...cottage cheese(?) in weird places. Other discussion topics may include: - Banana bread lovers : are they ew? - Concert pianist Buck Naked - Wanting cookies to taste less like sweet and more like chicken - Zombified Toucan Sam - What important lessons did the movie Psycho teach children?
#309
September 1 · 54 min
Ep. 309: Two Alien-Killing Potatoes in a Mild, Manageable Illness
After three weeks of Taiwan talk, Alice and Doug are back to their regularly scheduled programming. Which, this week includes “It Went Terribly!” Which, this month, includes…plenty of Taiwan talk. Whoops. Alice comes in hot this week, mocking Doug’s video game choices. But by the end she’s humbled via an unexpectedly stolen segment that concludes with an animal that’s potentially become her greatest rival. Doug’s probably just headed back to play Brotato. Other discussion topics may include: - The infamous case of Dicky v Dyke - When will they finally release a record player for cars? - Looking straight up like a dead, raw chicken - Why fewer and fewer people are being ear poisoned now - Is syphilis the greatest pox?
#308
August 25 · 46 min
Ep. 308: Two Little Aunts in a Seven-Story Taipei Mall
This week Alice finishes her tale of visiting Taipei with stories of chasing down English birth certificates, visiting IKEA, and, of course, using eastern toilets. Doug contributes a new game involving celebrity birthdays, explains why putting “Little” before a name upsets him, and has a hot take about…yes, toilets. Other discussion topics may include: - Childish Cardiac Arrests - How to stuff an ottoman in an overheard compartment - College nickname: Stares Forever - You don’t judge a man by the size of his pox - Should we get rid of urinals?
#307
August 18 · 56 min
Ep. 307: Two Buddhist Shrinky Dinks in a Freak Piano-Playing Accident
It’s time for Part Two of Alice’s Taipei Trip Trilogy. During this episode Alice tells Doug and listeners all about the weeklong funeral of her beloved aunt. Doug has a hard time wrapping his head around some customs with which he is not familiar. This is actually a very nice episode about mortality, customs, and family that can educate a lot of us. But hopefully just light and juvenile enough for a typical Going Terribly audience. In loving memory of Gloria.
#306
August 11 · 39 min
Ep. 306: Two Union Stations in a Birthday Cake Flavored Typhoon
Alice took a big trip to Taiwan this past week, and she's back just in time to tell everyone about it. Except that she and Doug don't get around to doing that because the trip back home took a day and a half and was filled with schedule disturbance after schedule disturbance. And, really, that's bonkers on its own. So that'll be this episode. Wanna hear about the Taipei trip? Maybe come back next week. Wanna hear some crazy tales while just trying to make it home? Well, boy, are you in luck! Other discussion topics may include: - Families who fly united or not at all - Can you poison someone in the ear? - When your luggage has business in a different city than your destination - A push for street view night time photos - Baby delivering bus drivers
#305
August 4 · 57 min
Ep. 305: Two Crate Diggers in a Ronald Reagan Monkey Movie
This week on Going Terribly, Doug and Alice discuss some ice cream dishes that even they wouldn’t eat. Or, well, you’d think so. But Alice seemed strangely into a couple. Cold gravy on ice cream? She’s into it somehow. Elsewhere, can you distinguish Harlequin romance novels from old classic records? We’ll see if Alice can. Most important, it’s “It Went Terribly” week, which means it’s the one episode per month where you can actually (sort of) learn some stuff! Other discussion topics may include: - Hal O’Ween: Who’s that dude?- Did you know Dylan and Cole Sprouse are twins? - Oscar the Grouch's consistently delicious sardine ideas - How many fonts can you name? - Songs about crushes on friends' grandmothers
#304
July 28 · 42 min
Ep. 304: Two Poutine Appropriators in an Indonesian Adventure
Alice and Doug are back from an Indonesian fueled trip to Indianapolis (Indonesapolis?), followed by a Canadian themed get together. It’s been some international weekend. Plus, Alice had two brushes with American Girl Doll fate. It doesn’t end exactly how one might think, but it does end mighty happily! And Doug is still really into Huey Lewis and the News. And jokes about meat.* Other discussion topics may include: - Circumcised candy corn - Pointy fragrances - Sucking chocolate off a Milky Way to improve one’s onions - The abject horror of the durian - Sharing more of your meat than you planned (*see?)
#303
July 21 · 44 min
Ep. 303: Two Ice Cream Princesses in a Spaghetti Three-Way
Another annual Nation Alice Cream Day ice cream crawl has come and gone, and Doug and Alice are still around to tell the tale. What hijinks did the group get up to? What flavors and creations did they get their grubby little mouths around? Did all of the 30+ participants make it out alive? Find out the answers to all these questions and more in this week’s dairy-fueled episode. Other discussion topics may include: - Good old family fun vs. porn - If you see a clown get hit by a car, do you laugh? - Digsey, the Disney knockoff - Main Street: Vertical vs. Horizontal - Dairy Potter and the Deathly Marshmallows
#302
July 14 · 36 min
Ep. 302: Two Greek Freaklings in a Chickpea Pasta Marathon
Alice and Doug just finished a heavy weekend of yard saling and record shopping. And now they’re ready for their heavy weekend of creaming. Er. It's the seventh annual National Ice Cream Day ice cream crawl! Yes, it’s just about time for the greatest time of the year. A day to enjoy all the tastiness that Ronald Reagan would have wanted us to. It’s true. Other discussion topics may include: - Why doesn’t anybody talk about how great Marie Osmond is? - Farting “regular amounts” - The sad part in a romance novel when the dog dies - What if one of the Hansons left Hanson? - The various health benefits of contrast therapy that can benefit your health and wellness in a beneficial manner
#301
July 7 · 1 hr 4 min
Ep. 301: Two Master Butter Sculptors in a Puzzle Palace
Alice and Doug spent America’s 250th birthday watching a murder movie, saving a queen, and eating Japanese food. They also visited the animals they'd just eaten because the circle of life is really weird sometimes. They also got a boat over the weekend! But it's not as exciting as it sounds* Plus, what if you’re driving a train and you’re about to hit a person? What do you do? Find out now! Other discussion topics may include: - Pancake race lore - Geena Davis: Beetlejuice Creature - Dead skin snacks - Fake aquarium trains - Is it hard to gently use two fingers? *...or is it?
#300
June 30 · 1 hr 22 min
Ep. 300: Three Chocolate Covered "Carrots" in a Twice-Failed Utopia
They said it couldn't be done. They said "But how could you?" They said "But why would you?" They said "NO, SERIOUSLY, WHO'D EVEN WANT YOU TO?!" But it finally happened. Going Terribly has reached 300 episodes! Even this week's special guest Kevin Roach immediately questions the achievement. But he also claims to have a boner ghost in his apartment, so who asked him anyway? Kevin joins Alice and Doug to rock some of Going Terribly's greatest hits and more juvenile humor than you could shake a "stick" at. Here's to 300 more episodes of barely growing up. Other discussion topics may include: - Mummy gut bread - Shark Dad - Holy fallopian tubes - Stoned dolphins - Definitely not a bag full of drugs You know, the usual.

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