Expecting Expats

Hosts Amanda and CJ

Welcome to Expecting Expats- a space where we’re expecting more than just babies—join Amanda, a childbirth educator and doula, and CJ, a therapist-in-training, as they explore parenting, partnerships, emotional growth, and the journey of building a life in a new country.

Play

Open in

22 episodes
fortnightly
Avg 40 min
English

Episodes 22

Newest Oldest Longest

All20 Unplayed20 In progress0 Played0

Counted on this page — what you have heard stays on this device, so it is not something the list can be paged by.

S3 · E31
Wednesday · 46 min
About Letting Go: Watching Our Kids Grow Up Abroad
Watching your kids grow up is one of those beautiful contradictions of parenthood: you can be incredibly proud of who they’re becoming while also quietly wishing you could freeze time. In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ have an honest, emotional conversation about the bittersweet experience of letting go as our children become more independent — and how that experience can feel even more complicated when you’re raising kids abroad. Amanda shares what it was like to say goodbye as her nine-year-old son flew to Madrid on a school trip — his first time travelling abroad without his parents. What should have been a moment of excitement and pride also brought a surprising amount of grief and anxiety as Amanda realized that her little boy is becoming a big kid. CJ reflects on her own smaller, everyday moments of letting go, from watching her four-year-old confidently navigate a doctor's appointment to realizing that her almost-three-year-old can do far more independently than she sometimes gives him credit for. Together, they talk about: 💕 The emotional rollercoaster of watching our children become more independent ✈️ Why a school trip abroad can feel like such a huge milestone 😭 How two things can be true at the same time — we can be proud and heartbroken, excited and scared 🍼 Why milestones like weaning can unexpectedly bring up feelings about our children growing up 🇩🇪 How parenting in Germany can encourage independence from a young age 🌍 The unique expat experience of raising children who may one day feel at home in multiple countries 🏡 What it means to be a “safe harbor” that our children can always return to 👣 Learning to support our children's independence without hovering 💭 The identity shifts that happen for us as our children need us in different ways 👀 The unique experience of being the people who hold the memories of our children's childhood when extended family lives far away ❤️ Learning to grieve the little versions of our children while making space for who they're becoming One of the biggest reminders from this conversation is that letting go isn't one single moment — it's a lifelong rhythm. Our children will continue to need us, but the way they need us will change. And perhaps that's the heart of parenting: helping them feel secure enough to go out into the world while knowing they always have somewhere safe to come home to. 🎧 What We're Listening To Amanda recommends: How to Let Go of What You Can't Control and Redirect Your Energy — Mel Robbins Podcast CJ recommends: Women Who Run with the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estés 💕 Connect With Amanda Amanda Graybill is a childbirth educator and birth doula supporting international families through pregnancy, birth and early parenthood in Frankfurt and beyond. Through Mindful Mama, Amanda offers English-language childbirth education, GentleBirth and other support for international families. 🌐 mindfulmamafrankfurt.com Amanda's work includes online and in-person support for international families, including childbirth education and pregnancy/parenting support. 💕 Connect With CJ CJ / Camilla Jensen is a couples counselor specializing in expat and international couples. Through Worlds Apart Counseling, CJ offers support to couples navigating relationships, connection and the unique challenges that can come with building a life abroad. 🌐 Worlds Apart Counseling You can learn more about CJ's work and book a session through her website.
S3 · E30
September 9 · 31 min
Summer Catch-Up: Travel, Family Chaos & Finding Your Way Back To Routine
Summer is (almost) over, and we're back in Frankfurt! ☀️🍂 In this lighthearted summer catch-up episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ sit down to share what their summers actually looked like—from family trips and international travel to summer camps, weddings, World Cup fever, and the very real exhaustion that comes with travelling with kids. CJ spent much of the summer at her family's holiday house in Sweden before heading to Denmark, while Amanda packed in trips to Valencia, Amsterdam and Utrecht, plus a children's sailing course back in Germany. Needless to say, neither summer was exactly restful! We chat about the joys (and challenges!) of travelling with children, including putting kids into a Spanish summer camp for the first time, navigating cultural differences around mealtimes and bedtime, and discovering that sometimes… home really is where the pretzels are. 🥨 We also talk about the reality of having young children at home during the long summer break—with no school or daycare—and why getting back to a regular routine can feel like such a relief for parents. But summer wasn't all chaos. We reflect on our summer bucket lists, the spontaneous moments that ended up being some of our favourites, and the things we want to carry with us into autumn. For CJ, that's the cosy feeling of Swedish summers and spending time in nature. For Amanda, it's making more room for fun and spontaneity while letting go of some of that summer FOMO. And because autumn feels a little bit like a new year when you're a parent, we also look ahead to what's coming next—including CJ's exciting new chapter as a certified couples counsellor. In this episode, we talk about: What a summer of expat family life really looks like Travelling around Europe with young children Spending the summer in Sweden, Denmark, Spain and the Netherlands Putting children into a Spanish summer camp for the first time The challenges (and unexpected joys) of navigating different cultures Why Spanish family events happening at 10pm can be a shock to the system! The never-ending work of feeding and entertaining children during school holidays The relief of getting back to school, daycare and regular routines Our summer bucket lists—and whether we actually completed them Summer nights, World Cup fever and spontaneous adventures The funny ways our children develop a sense of belonging Why sometimes home is where the pretzels are 🥨 What we want to leave behind and carry into the autumn Embracing cosy autumn vibes and making plans to get through the winter CJ's new chapter as a certified couples therapist Podcast Recommendations This episode's recommendations include: Two Cents Podcast – A witty and honest podcast about the experience of living life in Germany as African women. Camp Shame – A documentary-style, true-crime-ish podcast about a children's weight-loss camp. Definitely one for a particular mood! A little reminder for fellow expat parents Sometimes a holiday isn't actually a holiday. Travelling with children can mean cooking, cleaning, managing bedtime, navigating unfamiliar places and keeping everyone entertained—just in a different location. But that doesn't mean the memories aren't worth it. Whether your summer was full of adventures or mostly involved trying to keep everyone fed and alive, we hope this episode reminds you that you're not the only one figuring it out as you go. Thanks for joining us for this little summer update. We're so happy you're here❤️ More from Amanda & CJ 🌍 CJ — Worlds Apart Counseling CJ is a couples therapist who works with expat and international couples, helping partners navigate the unique challenges that can come with building a relationship and family across cultures. 👉 Worlds Apart Counseling 🌿 Amanda — Mindful Mama Frankfurt Amanda is a childbirth educator and doula offering childbirth education and support for international families in Frankfurt, with classes available in English. 👉 Mindful Mama Frankfurt
S3 · E29
August 26 · 44 min
Mom Rage: when the overwhelm, mental load and expectations becomes too much.
Have you ever felt so overwhelmed as a mother that you suddenly snap—and then immediately feel guilty or ashamed about it? In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ are having an honest, vulnerable conversation about something many mothers experience but few feel comfortable talking about: mom rage. Mom rage can feel frightening and completely out of character. It might look like yelling, snapping, feeling like you’re about to explode, or simply needing to get away because your nervous system has reached its limit. And while the aftermath can bring a huge amount of guilt and shame, this episode explores a different way of understanding these moments: what if rage is a signal rather than a personal failure? Amanda and CJ talk openly about their own experiences with mom rage, including the everyday situations that can push them over the edge—from bedtime battles and getting out the door in the morning to overstimulation, expectations, and the enormous mental load of motherhood. They also explore why anger can be particularly complicated for women. CJ shares insights from Rage Becomes Her by Soraya Chemaly about the ways women are often socialized to suppress anger, while Amanda reflects on the difference between ordinary anger and the feeling of rage that seems to take over before you have a chance to respond differently. And then there’s the expat parenting piece. When you're raising children abroad, the overwhelm of motherhood can come with another layer of complexity: parenting in a language that isn't your first, navigating unfamiliar systems, worrying about being judged, and trying to reconcile different cultural expectations about what "good parenting" looks like. We also talk about the difference between guilt and shame, why shame can keep mothers isolated, and how connection and community can help us move from “I am a bad mom” toward “I did something I wish I had handled differently.” Most importantly, we talk about what can actually help. From noticing the early physical signs of overwhelm, taking a break, stepping out of the room, asking your partner to take over, grounding yourself, and using tools to reduce sensory overload, Amanda and CJ share some practical strategies that can help you catch yourself before you get on the “crazy train.” And if you do snap? Repair—with your children, with yourself, and with the people you trust. Because mom rage is a nervous-system response to overwhelm, not proof that you're a bad mother. In this episode, we talk about: What mom rage actually feels like Why mom rage can feel so different from ordinary anger Overstimulation, stress, sleep deprivation and the mental load of motherhood The connection between anger, boundaries and unmet needs Why women are often taught to suppress anger Guilt vs. shame—and why the distinction matters The role of the nervous system and our fight-or-flight response Recognizing the warning signs before you reach your breaking point Practical strategies for managing overwhelm Repairing with your children after you've snapped Parenting across cultures and navigating conflicting expectations The additional pressures of expat motherhood Why community and connection are so important Learning to listen to your anger without taking it out on your children If you've ever wondered, “Why am I reacting like this? I love my children so much—so why do I feel like I'm about to explode?”—this conversation is for you. You are not alone. You are not a bad mother. And you don't have to carry the shame by yourself. Resources mentioned in this episode 📖 Mom Rage: Understanding Anger Before It Erupts 📖 Rage Becomes Her by Soraya Chemaly 🎧 The Motherhood Sessions 🎧 Motherhood Until Yesterday — including the episode On Mom Rage with Mina Dupin Keywords expat parenting, expat motherhood, expat family life, expat parenting tips, expat family support, mom rage, motherhood, maternal anger, parenting overwhelm, nervous system, motherhood abroad, international families
S3 · E28
August 12 · 46 min
Navigating Elterngeld & German Bureaucracy as an Expat Parent with Marijke
Having a baby is a huge life transition. Having a baby in a foreign country — while trying to navigate a complicated bureaucracy in a language that isn't your own — can add a whole other layer of overwhelm. In this episode of Expecting Expats, we talk with Marijke, co-founder of Elterngeld Help, about one of the less glamorous realities of expat family life in Germany: paperwork. From figuring out whether you're eligible for Elterngeld to understanding the difference between Basiselterngeld and ElterngeldPlus, there is a lot to understand — and many international parents don't realise just how much planning can affect the benefits they receive. Marijke shares her own experience of becoming a parent in Germany as a Dutch-British expat, including navigating the system as a self-employed, privately insured parent. Her experience of trying to understand a 23-page Elterngeld application eventually inspired her and her husband to create Elterngeld Help, a tool designed to make the process more accessible for international families. In this episode, we talk about: Why German bureaucracy can feel particularly overwhelming for international parents The emotional and mental load of navigating paperwork during the postpartum period What Elterngeld is and who may be eligible The differences between Basiselterngeld and ElterngeldPlus How working part-time can affect your Elterngeld Why self-employed parents need to understand how their income is calculated How having another child can affect your Elterngeld calculation Why it's important to understand your eligibility rather than assuming you don't qualify How visa status can affect Elterngeld eligibility Why some families wait months before receiving their first payment The importance of planning ahead if you're self-employed or considering having another baby Additional considerations for families with premature babies, twins, triplets or children with disabilities And why asking for support isn't a sign that you're failing — especially when you're navigating parenthood abroad About Elterngeld Help: Marijke runs Elterngeld Help, an English-language service for parents applying for Elterngeld in Germany. Free eligibility check, calculator and month planner. If you'd rather not fight the 23-page German form yourself, they'll go through your situation on a call and send back your complete, filled-in application within 48 hours. You sign it and send it off. Expecting Expats listeners get €30 off that service, €149 instead of €179, with code EXPECTING30. 👉 Find out more: elterngeldhelp.com More from Amanda & CJ 🌍 CJ — Worlds Apart Counseling CJ is a couples therapist who works with expat and international couples, helping partners navigate the unique challenges that can come with building a relationship and family across cultures. 👉 Worlds Apart Counseling 🌿 Amanda — Mindful Mama Frankfurt Amanda is a childbirth educator and doula offering childbirth education and support for international families in Frankfurt, with classes available in English. 👉 Mindful Mama Frankfurt Podcasts we recommend 🎧 As always, we ended the episode by sharing what we've been listening to lately. Marijke recommends: 🎧 Child — a BBC/Channel 4 podcast she listened to during pregnancy. She found it informative and reassuring, particularly because it helped her understand what was happening in her body throughout pregnancy. Amanda recommends:🎧 The Mel Robbins Podcast — Amanda has been listening to Mel Robbins again and particularly enjoyed a recent episode featuring an orthopaedic surgeon and longevity specialist, discussing ways women can support their long-term health and strength as they age. CJ recommends:🎧 Real Survival Stories — CJ has been listening to this podcast before falling asleep and particularly recommends the episode “Saved by a Humpback Whale,” a fascinating and touching story about a researcher who has an extraordinary encounter with a humpback whale.
S3 · E27
July 29 · 43 min
Re-Release: What Is GentleBirth? Preparing for an Empowered Birth with Amanda
Some conversations are simply too valuable to leave in the archives. In this special re-release of Expecting Expats, we're taking you back to one of our favourite early episodes, when CJ and former co-host Kari sat down with birth doula and GentleBirth instructor Amanda while both eagerly awaiting the arrival of their baby boys. At the time of this recording, Kari and CJ were preparing for birth themselves, and Amanda guided them through what it really means to prepare—not just physically, but mentally and emotionally—for one of life's biggest transitions. As a birth doula and GentleBirth instructor, Amanda's approach has always centred on helping women feel informed, confident, and empowered. Rather than focusing on achieving one specific type of birth, she encourages parents to build the knowledge, mindset, and tools they need to make decisions that feel right for them, no matter how their birth unfolds. For families navigating pregnancy abroad, this message can feel even more important. Different healthcare systems, unfamiliar birth practices, language barriers, and being far from your usual support network can leave many expectant parents feeling uncertain. Amanda reminds us that while we can't control every aspect of birth, we can prepare ourselves, understand our options, and advocate for our needs. What is GentleBirth? GentleBirth is a childbirth education and mindset programme that combines evidence-based birth education with mindfulness, breathing techniques, sports psychology, and cognitive training. Its goal isn't to promise a perfect or pain-free birth—instead, it helps parents develop confidence, resilience, and practical coping strategies so they can approach labour feeling calm, informed, and empowered. One of the core principles Amanda shares throughout this episode is that every woman deserves autonomy during birth. Understanding your options, asking questions, making informed decisions, and having a supportive birth partner can make a significant difference to your overall birth experience. In this episode, we talk about: * What GentleBirth is and how it differs from traditional birth preparation * Preparing mentally and emotionally for labour * Building confidence before birth * Why autonomy and informed decision-making matter * How birth partners can become your greatest source of support * Letting go of the idea of the "perfect" birth * Preparing for birth while living abroad * Feeling empowered, regardless of how your birth unfolds Our Favourite Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode: ✨ Learn about your birth options before labour begins. ✨ Choose a birth partner who understands how to advocate for your wishes. ✨ Preparation isn't about controlling birth—it's about building confidence and flexibility. ✨ Ask questions and don't be afraid to speak up for yourself. ✨ Remember that every birth is unique, and there is no single "right" way to give birth. A Reminder for Every Expectant Parent Birth rarely goes exactly as planned, but preparation can help you meet the unexpected with confidence. Whether you're planning a home birth, hospital birth, medicated birth, or caesarean birth, Amanda's message remains the same: you deserve to understand your choices, feel supported, and have a voice throughout your birth experience. For anyone navigating pregnancy while living abroad, this episode offers reassurance that knowledge, preparation, and the right support can help you feel more confident wherever in the world you're giving birth. Because empowering parents doesn't begin when the baby arrives—it begins during pregnancy. We hope you enjoy revisiting this special conversation with Amanda, and if you're hearing it for the first time, we hope it leaves you feeling informed, inspired, and ready to approach birth with confidence. Find out more about Amanda’s work here: https://www.mindfulmamafrankfurt.com Find CJ here: www.worldsapartcounseling.com
S3 · E26
July 15 · 49 min
Divorce, Co-Parenting, and Finding Strength as an Expat Family with Louisette Winkel
What happens when your family life changes dramatically while living far from home? In this heartfelt and deeply honest episode of Expecting Expats, we sit down with author, speaker, and founder of Ignite Spark, Louisette Winkel, to discuss one of the most challenging topics many families face: navigating separation and divorce while raising children abroad. As an expat mother of three, Louisette shares her personal journey of moving from the Netherlands to Germany, building a new life abroad, and later facing an unexpected separation. Through her story, she offers powerful insights into resilience, personal growth, and creating a healthy co-parenting relationship that keeps children's wellbeing at the centre. Together, we explore how expat parenting can become even more complex during major life transitions, especially when you're far from your usual support systems and navigating different legal systems, languages, and cultural expectations. This episode is filled with practical advice, hope, and reminders that even in life's most difficult moments, it's possible to create stability, connection, and a new vision for your family. In this episode, we talk about: * Navigating separation and divorce while living abroad * How expat life can add additional challenges to co-parenting * Supporting children through major family transitions * Creating a new family structure after divorce * Why personal growth is essential during difficult seasons of life * Helping children feel safe and heard during change * The importance of communication and collaboration in co-parenting * Finding community and rebuilding your support system as an expat parent * Creating new family traditions and redefining what family looks like Key Takeaways for Expat Parents ✨ Children need honesty, reassurance, and stability during periods of change. ✨ It's okay to acknowledge your own grief while still supporting your children. ✨ Co-parenting works best when parents focus on what they can control and keep their children's needs at the centre. ✨ Building a new version of family life takes time, patience, and flexibility. ✨ Seeking professional support, such as family or play therapy, can make a huge difference during transitions. Our Favourite Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode: * Keep communication open and age-appropriate with your children. * Involve children in conversations about new family routines when possible. * Inform schools and caregivers about major changes happening at home. * Lean on your community and ask for support when you need it. * Focus on creating a sense of safety and consistency for your children. * Remember that healing and rebuilding take time. A Reminder for Every Expat Parent Separation and divorce are never easy, and navigating them while living abroad can feel especially overwhelming. But this episode is a powerful reminder that there is no perfect way to move through difficult transitions. With patience, support, and intentional communication, families can find a new rhythm and create a version of expat family life that still feels loving, connected, and secure. Whether you're currently navigating separation, supporting a friend through it, or simply looking for expat parenting tips and insights into building resilient families abroad, this conversation offers compassion, practical advice, and hope. Because sometimes the greatest gift we can give our children is showing them that even in difficult seasons, families can adapt, heal, and grow together. Connect with Louisette Winkel Book: Flip Your Script Instagram: @ignitespark4u Website: https://www.ignitespark4u.com
S3 · E25
July 1 · 20 min
Summer Check-In: Navigating the Joys and Chaos of Expat Family Life
Summer has officially arrived, and for many international families, that means a season filled with sunshine, travel plans, school holidays, and a healthy dose of chaos. In this special catch-up episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ sit down for an honest conversation about what life looks like right now as moms raising children abroad. From summer bucket lists and family traditions to the realities of traveling with kids and attending weddings with little ones in tow, this episode is a reminder that expat parenting is often a balancing act between creating magical memories and simply surviving the logistics. CJ shares exciting personal news as she completes her couples therapy training and prepares to open her own practice supporting international families and couples in Frankfurt. Amanda opens up about the anticipation—and anxiety—of a summer packed with family adventures, including a formal wedding with two energetic boys. Together, they reflect on the changing seasons of expat motherhood, the freedom that comes as children get older, and the importance of embracing both the beautiful and messy moments of expat family life. In this episode, we talk about: * Creating summer bucket lists and family traditions * Managing the end-of-school-year chaos as an expat family * Travel hacks for long journeys with kids * The realities of bringing children to weddings and special events abroad * Finding time for yourself during motherhood * Embracing the changing stages of parenting as children grow * Building community and support while raising a family overseas Our Favourite Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode: * Create a simple family summer bucket list with experiences everyone can enjoy. * Lower the pressure and focus on connection over perfection. * Travel days are easier with snacks, screens, and realistic expectations. * Remember that children are allowed to be children—even at fancy events. * Give yourself permission to enjoy this season of life and say yes to a little fun. A Reminder for Every Expat Parent If you're feeling both excited and overwhelmed by summer, you're not alone. The pressure to make magical memories while managing work, travel, and everyday parenting is real. This episode is your reminder that there is no perfect way to do summer or parent abroad. Whether you're planning adventures, visiting family, or simply trying to survive the school holidays, we hope this conversation makes you feel seen and supported. Because expat family support starts with knowing that other parents are navigating the same joys and challenges right alongside you. We'd Love to Hear From You What are your family's summer plans? Are you already in holiday mode? Send us a voice message on Instagram—we'd love to hear your stories and may even feature them in a future episode of Expecting Expats. Happy summer from our family to yours! Podcast recommendations: Molly’s morning meditations Link to Amanda’s website: www.mindfulmamafrankfurt.com Link to CJ’s webside: www.worldsapartcounseling.com
S3 · E24
June 17 · 40 min
Hallway Claustrophobia: Why Getting Out the Door Feels So Hard as an Expat Parent
Have you ever found yourself standing in a crowded hallway, desperately searching for a missing shoe while one child refuses to get dressed, another is asking a thousand questions, and you're already late? If so, you're not alone. In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ dive into what they're calling "hallway claustrophobia"—that overwhelming feeling that seems to strike during family transitions, especially during hectic mornings, school drop-offs, travel days, and bedtime routines. Together, they explore why these moments feel so intense, how overstimulation affects both parents and children, and why these everyday challenges can feel even bigger when you're navigating expat family life. From managing the emotional load of parenting abroad to handling transitions in a new language and culture, this episode is a reassuring reminder that you're not failing—you're simply human. Amanda and CJ share honest stories from their own experiences with expat parenting, discuss how stress and sensory overload impact the nervous system, and offer practical strategies for staying regulated when family life feels chaotic. Whether you're newly abroad or have been living overseas for years, this conversation will leave you feeling seen, validated, and equipped with a few new tools to navigate the everyday challenges of expat motherhood, expat parenting, and raising children far from home. In This Episode, We Discuss: * Why mornings and family transitions can feel overwhelming * The science behind parental overstimulation and transition fatigue * How moving abroad impacts stress levels for parents and children * Why kids often struggle with transitions and routines * The connection between time pressure, sensory overload, and emotional regulation * Practical ways to manage overwhelm during busy family moments * The importance of repair after losing your patience * How to create more calm and connection during daily routines * Why self-compassion matters in expat family life Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode: * Slow down when possible—everything is not an emergency * Notice signs of overstimulation before reaching your limit * Take a breath or step away briefly when emotions start rising * Prepare for transitions by giving children advance notice * Remember the HALT check-in: Are you Hungry, Angry, Lonely, or Tired? * Focus on repair rather than perfection after difficult parenting moments * Give yourself grace—raising a family abroad comes with unique challenges Resources Mentioned * Good Inside Podcast with Dr. Becky * Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women's Anger by Soraya Chemaly Connect With Us Have you experienced "hallway claustrophobia" or another version of transition overwhelm? We'd love to hear from you. Share your experiences, questions, and favorite expat parenting tips with us. Your stories help strengthen the expat family support community we're building together. If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with another parent who might need the reminder that they're not alone. Because parenting abroad is hard—but you don't have to do it alone.
S3 · E23
June 3 · 53 min
Trading Germany for Spain: Rebuilding a Business + Expat Family Life with Seli Jacome
In today’s episode of our Expat Experts Series, Amanda and CJ sit down with Seli Jacome —a birth and postpartum doula, lactation consultant, and former Frankfurt resident who flipped the script on expat family life four years ago by relocating her trilingual family to Valencia, Spain. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to move out of Germany, or how to navigate the vulnerable phases of expat motherhood while building a business from scratch in a brand-new country, this episode is a must-listen! 🎧 Key Takeaways from the episode: * The Search for Slow Living: How the desire for green space, safety, and a slower pace of life drove Seli's family to move from Germany to Spain. * Embracing Multi-Cultural Identity: Seli discusses navigating her family's unique German, Korean, Mexican, and British roots within expat parenting. * The "DIY" Approach to Expat Parenting: How Seli spotted a massive gap in the Spanish postpartum healthcare system and created her own international community groups (including a massive secondhand kids' market in her garden!). * The Mental Load of a Third Language: The exhausting reality of managing pediatric appointments, school systems, and daily life when navigating your third language. * Germany vs. Spain: A fascinating comparison of school flexibility, healthcare structures, and why Seli’s family swapped German structure for Spanish sunshine and a slower pace of life. * Navigating Big Moves with Teens & Newborns: Seli’s firsthand expat parenting tips on moving across Europe with older children and a 7-week-old baby in tow. 📝 Other Episode Highlights 🌍 A Truly Global Family Background Seli is half-German and half-Korean, married to a man who is half-Mexican and half-British. Together with their three kids, they speak English, Spanish, and German at home. Despite deep roots in Germany, Seli opens up about never feeling like she 100% fit in—and how that ultimate search for belonging led them to the colorful, diverse expat bubble of Valencia. 🛑 The Shock of Spanish Bureaucracy & Healthcare Think German paperwork is tough? Seli shares hilarious and stressful stories of navigating old-school Spanish paper trails. She also breaks down the cultural shocks of expat motherhood in Spain, where the cozy German Hebamme (midwife) home-visit culture doesn't exist, forcing new moms to navigate postpartum care entirely differently. 💼 Finding Your Niche in a New Market When Seli arrived in Spain, she realized local mothers return to work much earlier (around 4 months) compared to Germany, leaving a massive lack of expat family support for postpartum care and community playgroups. By embracing a "Do-It-Yourself" attitude, she successfully rebuilt her doula and education practice to serve the international community. ⭐ Connect with Our Guest * Find Seli here: * www.21doulaservice.es * 21doulaservice_selijacome ❤️ Enjoyed this episode? If you found Seli’s expat parenting journey inspiring, please leave us a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify! Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode filled with real, raw stories and practical expat family support. Podcast recommendations: Neuroshambles
S3 · E22
May 20 · 39 min
Raising Third Culture Kids: Superpowers, Identity Crises, and Where the Pretzels are
What happens when you’re raising children in a country completely different from your passport culture? In this episode, Amanda and CJ explore the beautifully complicated reality of expat parenting and raising Third Culture Kids (TCKs). From blending holiday traditions (think Danish elves, St. Nicholas, and Santa Claus all competing for airtime) to navigating identity, belonging, and the ever-changing meaning of “home,” this conversation dives deep into modern expat family life. Amanda and CJ share honest stories about expat motherhood, cultural confusion, and the emotional challenges that come with raising globally mobile kids. Whether your children are fluent culture-switchers, “look-alike” TCKs, or simply obsessed with German bakery pretzels, this episode offers reassurance, laughter, and practical insight for parents building lives abroad. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re doing this whole international parenting thing “right,” this episode is packed with relatable moments, encouragement, and thoughtful expat parenting tips. Most importantly, it’s a reminder that while raising TCKs can create complicated identity questions, it also gives children extraordinary adaptability, empathy, and resilience. Key Takeaways * What is a TCK? A Third Culture Kid (TCK) is someone raised outside their parents’ passport culture, blending their home culture with the culture of their host country to create a unique “third culture” identity shared by many internationally mobile families. * The “Look-Alike” vs. “Non-Look-Alike” TCK Experience Amanda and CJ discuss how children who physically resemble the dominant culture of their host country are often expected to fully understand the language and social norms—creating a unique layer of identity pressure many expat families experience. * Redefining the Meaning of Home In both expat motherhood and broader expat family life, “home” often becomes less about geography and more about relationships, routines, and emotional connection. * The Hidden Superpowers of TCKs While global mobility can bring challenges like transient friendships and identity struggles, TCKs frequently develop remarkable emotional intelligence, cultural adaptability, communication skills, and resilience in uncertainty. * The Importance of Expat Family Support Raising children abroad can feel isolating at times, which is why strong community, honest conversations, and reliable expat family support systems are so important for both parents and kids. Book recommendations: Third Culture Kids: Growing Up Among Worlds Rage becomes her: The Power of Women’s Anger, by Soraya Chemaly Podcast Recommendations: Disengaged, by Leah Harding
S3 · E21
May 6 · 34 min
Raising Multilingual Kids: Strategies, Challenges, and Celebrations
In this episode of Expecting Expat, we dive into the wonderful world of expat parenting and explore the joys and challenges of raising multilingual children across cultures. Whether you're navigating expat family life or seeking expat parenting tips, this episode offers practical insights and heartfelt stories about fostering language skills and cultural identity abroad. We discuss various language strategies, including one parent, one language, minority language at home, context switching, and more. Hear real stories from parents balancing multiple languages at home, managing language loss, and creating meaningful expat family support networks. Learn how your children’s multilingual development can become a gift of access to culture and media, and discover tips on maintaining language skills across generations, connecting with grandparents, and embracing the beautiful complexity of expat motherhood. If you're raising multilingual kids in a foreign country or simply curious about how language shapes cultural identity, this episode is packed with relatable experiences and advice. Join us for an inspiring conversation about the unique expat family journey of language, culture, and connection. Podcast recommendations: Real survival stories (by Noiser) The Daily (by The New York Times)
April 22 · 30 min
Expat Experts: Building community through language learning - Interview with Amy Fletcher.
✨ Episode Summary Moving abroad is exciting—but it can also feel isolating. In this episode of Expecting Expats, we sit down with Amy Fletcher, founder of Speak Easy Sprachschule in Frankfurt, to explore how language learning can become a powerful tool for building community, confidence, and connection. Amy shares her journey from the U.S. to Germany, how she built a community-centered language school, and why integration is about so much more than grammar and vocabulary. From the challenges of feeling “like a beginner again” to the magic of forming friendships through shared learning, this conversation dives deep into what it really takes to feel at home abroad. 💡 What We Cover * Why 87% of expats experience isolation—and how to overcome it * The idea of “invisible anchors” and what we lose when we move abroad * How language learning can feel humbling, frustrating, and empowering * Why community is just as important as conjugation * The role of confidence and mindset in learning a new language * How social events (like art meetups and casual conversations) accelerate integration * The impact of AI and language apps—and why they can’t replace real connection * What it’s really like to run a business as an expat in Germany 🧠 Key Takeaways * Language learning isn’t just about words—it’s about belonging * Feeling like a beginner again is part of the process (and it’s okay) * Connection builds confidence, and confidence builds language skills * You don’t need perfect language skills to start building community * Sometimes the best step forward is simply showing up 🗣️ Memorable Quotes “Learning a language is an infantilizing process—you feel like a child again.” “The language is almost the conduit—it’s how friendships are formed.” “Community starts with connection… sometimes with a single hello—or hallo.” 🌍 About Our Guest Amy Fletcher is the founder of SpeakEasy Sprachschule in Frankfurt, a language school focused not just on teaching languages, but on creating meaningful social connections for expats. Through community events, conversation-based learning, and a welcoming environment, Amy helps newcomers feel at home in Germany. Find out more about SpeakEasy here: speakeasy-sprachschule.de 🎧 Podcast Recommendations from This Episode * Coffee Break German – great for beginners (A1–A2) * Warum Nicht? (Deutsche Welle) – structured learning for beginners * Easy German – ideal for intermediate learners (B1–B2) * Fest & Flauschig – for advanced learners (C1+) who want real, fast-paced German * Sweet Bobby – a gripping storytelling podcast * Molly’s Mornings – mindful reflections and daily rituals 💬 Final Thought Building a life abroad takes courage—but it doesn’t have to be lonely. Whether it’s through language, shared experiences, or simply showing up, connection is always the first step.
April 18 · 49 min
C-section Awareness Month: Amanda shares her story of an unexpected c-section
📝 Episode Description In this special 6-month anniversary episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda shares the birth story of her first child—an unexpected and unplanned C-section that changed everything. Recorded during C-section Awareness Month, this honest conversation explores the realities of expat motherhood, navigating pregnancy and birth in a foreign healthcare system, and what happens when birth plans don’t go as expected. Amanda opens up about her experience with prodromal labor, a stressful hospital induction, and ultimately a traumatic birth that led to postpartum PTSD. Through it all, she reflects on the emotional impact, the challenges of expat family life, and how this experience shaped her journey into becoming a childbirth educator and doula. This episode is raw, real, and an important reminder that every birth story matters—and that support, preparation, and advocacy are key in expat parenting. ⚠️ Content note: This episode includes discussion of birth trauma and may be triggering for some listeners. 💬 What We Talk About * Celebrating 6 months of Expecting Expats 🎉 * Amanda’s pregnancy as an expat in Germany * The challenges of preparing for birth abroad * Navigating language barriers in birth classes * Prodromal labor and the emotional toll of “waiting” * A chaotic lead-up to labor (including illness and unexpected events) * Hospital experiences and feeling unheard during labor * The reality of an emergency C-section * Birth trauma and postpartum PTSD * Struggles with early bonding and recovery * The importance of expat family support during postpartum * How Amanda’s experience shaped her work supporting other families 🌍 Key Takeaways for Expat Families Amanda’s story highlights important lessons for anyone navigating expat parenting and expat family life: * Birth rarely goes exactly as planned—flexibility is essential * Understanding the local healthcare system can make a huge difference * Advocacy matters: knowing your options and asking questions is key * Postpartum planning is just as important as birth planning * Emotional recovery deserves just as much attention as physical healing * Building a strong network of expat family support can be invaluable 💡 Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode * Don’t over-schedule the postpartum period—leave space to recover * Prepare mentally for multiple birth scenarios, including C-sections * Consider hiring a doula, especially when navigating birth abroad * Take birth classes in a language you fully understand * Trust your instincts—but also prepare how to advocate within the system * Seek professional support if you experience birth trauma 🤍 A Note from Amanda This story is shared with honesty and vulnerability to help other women feel less alone. Whether your journey into expat motherhood is smooth or complicated, your experience is valid—and support is always available. 🎧 What We’re Listening To This week, we’re both hooked on:Real Survival Stories – gripping, real-life survival experiences with a surprisingly soothing narrator. 📌 Connect With Us If this episode resonated with you, share it with another expat parent or leave us a review—it helps more families find support and community.
S3 · E18
April 8 · 45 min
Choosing a School Abroad: Head, Heart & Identity
Choosing a school is one of the biggest—and often most emotional—decisions in expat parenting. In this episode, Amanda and CJ dive into the realities of navigating school choices while raising kids abroad, especially within the context of expat motherhood and expat family life. With millions of families living outside their home countries, the question of local vs. international school is more relevant than ever. But beyond academics, this decision touches on identity, belonging, language, and your child’s long-term development. What We Cover In this episode, we explore: * The pros and cons of local vs. international schools * How school choice impacts your child’s identity and cultural connection * The role of language in expat family life and long-term integration * Practical considerations like cost, commute, curriculum, and teacher turnover * The emotional side of decision-making in expat motherhood We also share personal stories from raising children in Germany and the very real pressures that come with making “the right” choice for your family. Expat Parenting Tips from This Episode If you’re currently choosing a school abroad, here are some key expat parenting tips we discuss: * Think beyond academics: Schools shape values, identity, and social skills * Consider your child’s temperament: Will they thrive in a new language environment? * Ask the right questions: * What language(s) are used in teaching? * How does the school support non-native speakers? * What’s the teacher turnover rate? * Look at logistics: Where do classmates live? How easy are playdates? * Plan for the future: Will this school support potential moves to another country? Supporting Your Expat Family This episode highlights the importance of expat family support—from teachers, schools, and fellow parents. Whether you choose a local or international path, having a supportive community can make all the difference in your child’s experience (and yours). Join the Conversation We’d love to hear from you: * How did you choose a school for your child abroad? * What factors mattered most to your family? * Do you have any advice for other expat parents navigating this decision? Send us a message or connect with us on social—we’re building this space together 💛 🎧 Mentioned in This Episode * “Unpacked” podcast – on navigating expat life during crisis * “The Psychology of Your 20s” – insights on identity, attachment, and more
S3 · E17
March 25 · 42 min
Starting Kita in Germany - What Expat Parents Need to Know
Starting daycare abroad can feel overwhelming — especially when you’re navigating a new system, a new language, and a new culture at the same time. In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ talk about one of the biggest milestones in expat family life: starting Kita (daycare) in Germany. From confusing application portals to the emotional rollercoaster of the settling-in period, this conversation covers the practical realities and the emotional side of expat parenting when your child enters childcare in a new country. Whether you’re pregnant, waiting for a daycare spot, or already in the middle of the process, this episode is packed with honest stories, helpful insights, and real-life expat parenting tips. 🇩🇪 What we talk about in this episode * How the German Kita system works * Why you may need to apply for daycare while still pregnant * Different childcare options (Kita, Tagesmutter, kindergarten) * What the Eingewöhnung settling-in period is really like * How long the adjustment phase can take (and why it’s hard to plan around) * The emotional side of daycare for parents — guilt, relief, and everything in between * Why childcare is especially important for expat family support * How sibling spots and networking sometimes help you get a place * What to look for when choosing a Kita * How daycare culture in Germany differs from other countries 🌍 Expat parenting reality: Doing it without family nearby For many families abroad, daycare isn’t just helpful — it’s essential. Without grandparents or relatives nearby, childcare providers often become a key part of your expat motherhood and expat parenting journey. Amanda and CJ share their own experiences raising kids in Germany, including: * Finding childcare without local family support * Balancing work, identity, and motherhood abroad * Feeling guilty even when daycare is the right choice * Why high-quality childcare matters so much for expat families ❤️ The emotional side of starting daycare Starting Kita isn’t just a logistical step — it’s a huge emotional transition. In this episode we talk about: * The first time leaving your baby with someone else * Feeling ready to work again but also sad * How the slow German settling-in process can help both parents and kids * Why the transition can be harder for expats If you’re in the middle of this stage, you’re not alone — and this episode is here to give you reassurance, perspective, and practical expat parenting tips. 📚 Recommendations from this episode * Book: Your Competent Child by Jesper Juul * Podcast: The Worldschooling Podcast 🎧 About Expecting Expats Expecting Expats is a podcast about expat motherhood, expat parenting, and expat family life — the real, honest, sometimes messy experience of raising children abroad. We talk about pregnancy, parenting, relationships, identity, and building a support system far from home. If you enjoyed this episode, don’t forget to subscribe and share it with another expat parent who might need some expat family support today.
S3 · E16
March 11 · 39 min
The role of Attachment - in early childhood and adult relationships
In this episode, Amanda and CJ explore the significance of attachment styles in early childhood and adult relationships, particularly for expat families. They discuss how early attachment shapes emotional stability and learning, the implications of the still face study, and common misconceptions about attachment. The conversation delves into the four adult attachment styles, the impact of moving abroad on attachment, and practical tips for new parents to foster secure attachments. They emphasize the importance of communication, repair in relationships, and creating stability through routines and rituals. Podcast recommendations: The Mel Robbin’s Podcast: Why do I love the way that I love? The 4 attachment styles explained: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3MC7N7rJW2KHoHdSQgmnCx?si=i7ioP_ddTSGBW68NSq3fTw Dybdepsykologi: https://open.spotify.com/show/10J3TORvJKFMANnCHrimKd?si=qu9aTy2FQNypOC2HuYaI1w
S3 · E15
February 25 · 45 min
Expat Experts: Navigating Perimenopause: Interview with Dr. Colette White
In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ delve into the often misunderstood topic of perimenopause, a phase that affects millions of women globally. They are joined by Dr. Colette White, a clinician specializing in women's health, who shares her insights on the challenges women face during this transition. Dr. White emphasizes the importance of awareness and education regarding perimenopause, highlighting that symptoms can begin as early as the mid-30s and can include mood changes, sleep disturbances, and physical discomfort. Despite the prevalence of these symptoms, many women feel unprepared and unsupported due to a lack of information and stigma surrounding the topic. Dr. White discusses her personal journey through motherhood and perimenopause, illustrating the unique challenges faced by expat women navigating healthcare systems in foreign countries. She stresses the importance of seeking evidence-based support and encourages women to document their symptoms to better communicate with healthcare providers. The conversation also touches on the misconceptions surrounding hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and the benefits it can offer, dispelling fears and promoting a proactive approach to managing health during this life stage. Overall, the episode serves as a valuable resource for women seeking clarity and support during their perimenopausal journey. Link to Dr. White’s website: https://www.menocare.de/ Find her on instagram: @menocare_de Podcast Recommendations: Unpacked with Anna & Emma: Episode 14, The Magic Formula for Thriving abroad: https://open.spotify.com/episode/6PLm1K0soaAuB8FYNH3Z5r?si=tqmxEN_HTTS7U5s9inq2Sw Wiser than me with Julia Louis-Dreyfus: https://open.spotify.com/show/3zaHNdVeLiqOSXwxdoWcij?si=iKdJTD83RYWt8n_mGrPOZw How to Fail by Elizabeth Day: https://open.spotify.com/show/4m7U7kNne0iu35HK571Ui8?si=Kzg847O9TOCtciKzFuPuMg
S3 · E14
February 11 · 28 min
Keeping the romance alive after kids: a Valentines Special
In this episode, Amanda and CJ explores the significant decline in sex among couples after having children, highlighting the various factors contributing to this change, including fatigue, caregiving demands, and shifts in couple dynamics. Takeaways * A lot of studies show that couples' sex life tends to decline after having kids. * Fatigue, sleep disruption, and caregiving demands contribute to this decline. * Change in roles and less couple time affects intimacy. * As much as 60% of married couples report a decrease in sexual frequency after having kids. * 30% say that sex has become less satisfying in the last five years after having kids. * The decline in sexual frequency is a significant issue for many couples. * Understanding these changes is crucial for maintaining intimacy. * Couples need to find ways to reconnect after having children. * Communication is key to addressing sexual satisfaction. * Support systems can help couples navigate these challenges. Podcast Recommendation: Motherhood Sessions: 2 Years Without Sex : https://open.spotify.com/episode/4oQ1SbW6yVw6ILUhixUeOs?si=m0Nn1kC5RraRBG6mYl2bRA Book Recommendation: Mating in Captivity: Unlocking Erotic Intelligence by Ester Perel
S3 · E13
January 29 · 34 min
Who am I now? Identity changes in motherhood
In this episode of Expecting Expats, Amanda and CJ explore the profound identity shifts that accompany motherhood, particularly for those parenting abroad. They discuss personal experiences, the evolution of relationships, the importance of community support, and strategies for reclaiming one's identity amidst the challenges of motherhood. The conversation emphasizes that while the journey can be difficult, it ultimately leads to personal growth and a new understanding of self. Takeaways * Becoming a parent reshapes your identity in profound ways. * Motherhood abroad adds layers of complexity to identity shifts. * It's common to feel a sense of loss regarding your old self. * The transition into motherhood often involves grief for your previous life. * Community support is crucial for navigating motherhood. * Reclaiming your identity is a step-by-step process. * Relationships with partners and friends evolve after having children. * Self-care practices, like meditation, can help in the transition. * Understanding that motherhood is an evolution can provide relief. * You're not alone in feeling lost; it's a shared experience among mothers. Podcast recommendation: This is Actually Happening (by Wondery) Book recommendation: Boy mom (by Ruth Whippman) Link to the podcast episode referred to: https://open.spotify.com/episode/26KSGRz0cYTubqqnp366d5?si=UynpSCuUS3ycpPzBhmursA
S3 · E12
January 21 · 25 min
Post holiday check in
Amanda and CJ discusses how their New Years ritual unfolded and how they feel about the wish they are responsible for (listen to the holiday special episode for context). CJ also shares her considerations regarding having another child. Podcast recommendations: Dr. Death (from Wondery) A Little Bit Culty The Daily (from New York Times)

Showing 1–20 of 22 episodes