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Unshaming AuDHD

Jes Diverges

Welcome to UnShaming AuDHD - a podcast for autistic ADHDers who want to remove shame, blame, and guilt from their lives and replace them with curiosity, compassion, and joy. I'm your host, Jes Diverges, and I'm here to help you reconnect to the authentic and unapologetic version of yourself that's been hidden away by systemic, interpersonal, and intergenerational shame. My goal with each episode is that you walk away feeling at least 1% more seen, heard, valued, and loved, because you belong here. You have *always* belonged here. Let's get into it.

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  • 17 episodes
  • Avg 47 min
  • English

Episodes 17

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  • September 11 · 1 hr 14 min

    015: How To Avoid Burning Out While Recovering From AuDHD Burnout

    In this episode of UnShaming AuDHD, hosts Jes Diverges and Javelin Laurence explore how neurodivergent individuals can avoid burning out while attempting to recover from or prevent AuDHD burnout. They unpack how traditional self-care or recovery practices often turn into rigid expectations that compound exhaustion and prolong recovery. The hosts define AuDHD burnout as a deep mismatch between demands and capacity, contrasting it with standard career burnout and highlighting severe impacts like skill regression. To catch approaching burnout early, Jes and Javelin share personal yellow and red flags, including apathy toward favorite hobbies, difficulty cooking, and heightened irritability. They discuss practical, low-demand strategies such as "no expectation days" and "task tiering" to safely lower life's difficulty volume and dismantle all-or-nothing thinking. Finally, the hosts emphasize radical acceptance, releasing artificial urgency, and honoring one's individual capacity without guilt or shame. Autistic Burnout Scale: https://www.instagram.com/p/DDPwf42uNwl/ Jes’s AuDHD Allowed & Out Loud program: https://www.jesdiverges.com/allowedandoutloud Jav’s Coaching For Queer Artists In Alberta, CA: https://www.alchemycoaching.ca/free-coaching-program Other Links & Resources: Javelin’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/javelinlaurence Javelin’s Coaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alchemydivergencecoaching Javelin's Website: https://www.alchemycoaching.ca/ Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join Jes’s Combo Platter Community: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • March 20 · 45 min

    014: How Spirituality, Magic, & AuDHD Collide, Pt. 2: Where We Are Now

    In this two-part episode, Jes and Javelin explore how growing up Catholic and evangelical (respectively) shaped their beliefs, and how they each found their way into witchcraft, tarot, and more expansive, queer-affirming spirituality. They talk about magic as “science we haven’t explained yet,” the power of placebo, talismans, and ritual, and why neurodivergent brains often thrive on phases instead of rigid consistency. Together, they unpack shame, “good vs bad person” thinking, capitalism, and the myth of being fundamentally broken—offering play, silliness, and wholehearted choice as deeply spiritual practices. Links: Javelin’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/javelinlaurence Javelin’s Coaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alchemydivergencecoaching Javelin's Webside: https://www.alchemydivergencecoaching.com Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join Jes’s Combo Platter Community: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • March 20 · 51 min

    014: How Spirituality, Magic, & AuDHD Collide, Pt. 1: Where We Came From

    In this two-part episode, Jes and Javelin explore how growing up Catholic and evangelical (respectively) shaped their beliefs, and how they each found their way into witchcraft, tarot, and more expansive, queer-affirming spirituality. They talk about magic as “science we haven’t explained yet,” the power of placebo, talismans, and ritual, and why neurodivergent brains often thrive on phases instead of rigid consistency. Together, they unpack shame, “good vs bad person” thinking, capitalism, and the myth of being fundamentally broken—offering play, silliness, and wholehearted choice as deeply spiritual practices. Links: Javelin’s Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/javelinlaurence⁠ Javelin’s Coaching Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/alchemydivergencecoaching⁠ Javelin's Webside: ⁠https://www.alchemydivergencecoaching.com ⁠ Jes’s Website: ⁠⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠⁠ Join Jes’s Combo Platter Community: ⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s Instagram: ⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠⁠ Jes’s TikTok: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠⁠ Jes’s Substack: ⁠⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠⁠

  • February 27 · 58 min

    013: What's In A Hobby?

    New co-host Javelin Laurence joins Jes to talk about all things hobbies as an autistic ADHDer. They discuss what makes a hobby a hobby, how auDHDers tend to interact with their hobbies (or not), and Javelin shares their three rules for sustainable, long lasting hobby-having. Links: Javelin’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/javelinlaurence Javelin’s Coaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alchemydivergencecoaching Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join Jes’s Combo Platter Community: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Jes’s Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • January 21 · 21 min

    012: What Is Unshaming?

    In this episode, I dive into what I actually mean when I say “unshaming auDHD.” I discuss how shame is not an emotion, but a lens through which we learn to view ourselves. I also talk about where shame comes from, and how to acknowledge and work with it by developing a counteractive voice called a loving witness. David Bedrick’s website: www.davidbedrick.com Other Links & Resources: Individual Coaching: www.jesdiverges.com/individualcoaching AuDHD Summer Camp: www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp Join The Combo Platter: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join My Email List: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • Jul 9, 2025 · 33 min

    011: I Think I'm AuDHD... What the #&@! Do I Do Now??

    In this episode, Jes goes into all the basics that you need to know if you’re just starting to realize that you’re an autistic ADHDer as an adult. They talk about the pros and cons of getting an official diagnosis (yes, there are cons), as well as some steps you can take with a perfectly valid self-diagnosis in order to learn more about your auDHD brain and how to accommodate yourself. Self-Assessments: https://embrace-autism.com/autism-tests/ Neurodivergent Therapist Directories: https://psychologytoday.com https://liberatorywellnessnetwork.com https://neurodivergentpractitioners.org/ https://ndtherapists.com/ My Services: https://jesdiverges.com/comboplatter https://jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp https://jesdiverges.com/individualcoaching Other Links: Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join My Email List: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • Jun 2, 2025 · 30 min

    010: Deconstructing Your Lens for Disability

    In this solo episode of UnShaming auDHD, host Jes Diverges unpacks the complex world of disability models, offering a nuanced exploration of how society understands neurodivergence. Critically examining the medical, social, and holistic models, Jes challenges deficit-based thinking and shares her preferred holistic approach that recognizes disability as an intersectional experience shaped by biological, psychological, and societal factors. Drawing from personal insights and scholarly research, she advocates for a balanced perspective that celebrates neurodiversity, challenges systemic barriers, and provides meaningful accommodations. This episode, which serves as an introduction to her upcoming book, offers listeners a compassionate and empowering view of disability that goes beyond traditional diagnostic frameworks. (episode description & transcript generated by otter.ai) Links & Other Resources: Book mentioned: Decolonizing Therapy by Dr. Jennifer Mullan Creator mentioned: Rebecca, 15 Tenets of White Supremacy series & LOTS of other great content: https://patreon.com/whitewomanwhisperer Models of Disability Article: https://autistictic.com/2020/02/14/the-holistic-model-of-disability/#:~:text=The Holistic Model of Disability recognizes that every disabled person's,and could improve their life. Autistic vs. Allistic Morals Study (TW for strong deficit language against autists): https://autistictic.com/2020/02/14/the-holistic-model-of-disability/#:~:text=The Holistic Model of Disability recognizes that every disabled person's,and could improve their life. Join The Combo Platter: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join My Email List: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • Apr 30, 2025 · 48 min

    009: Masking, Misdiagnosis, and More w/ Javelin Laurence

    In this episode, Jes sits down with Javelin Laurence to explore the complexities of psychology through a neurodivergent lens. They discuss Javelin's journey of self-discovery, from early fascinations with personality tests to understanding their ADHD and autistic identity. The conversation delves into the limitations of Western psychology, the challenges of misdiagnosis, and the importance of recognizing individual experiences in mental health. Javelin shares insights from their coaching work and personal experiences, offering a critical and compassionate perspective on neurodiversity. (Episode description & transcript generated by otter.ai) Links & Resources: Book Mentioned: Neurotribes by Steve Silberman Javelin’s Website & Blog: https://www.alchemycoaching.ca Javelin’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alchemydivergencecoaching Javelin’s TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@JavelinLaurence Other Links & Resources: Join The Combo Platter: ⁠https://www.patreon.com/jesdiverges Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join My Email List: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • Mar 6, 2025 · 1 hr 57 min

    008: Juggling Life's Balls and Befriending Inner Demons w/ Emme Kay Kennedy

    Hello hello everyone, I have another amazing guest for you all this week. I sat down with my good friend Emme who is a performer, podcaster, writer, artist, comedienne, clown, transwoman, and lesbian - although not necessarily in that order - for a conversation all about clowning, and what it means to make fun of yourself. We also talked about holding the paradox of existing as a queer human in an increasingly scary world, and took a deep dive into IFS therapy and parts work. Basically, it was the most low key and casual conversation ever. We didn’t plan any part of this conversation but it took us to so many interesting places and I can’t wait for y’all to listen to it! Emme's Links: Emme’s GoFundMe: bit.ly/emmekay Emme’s Podcast: Embracing Elephants on Spotify & Apple Instagram: @EmbracingElephants Other Links: AuDHD Summer Camp: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp⁠ Jes’s Website: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com⁠ Jes’s Email: ⁠⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠⁠ Join My Email List: ⁠https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter⁠ Instagram: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges⁠ TikTok: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Substack: ⁠https://substack.com/@jesdiverges⁠ Transcript Document: ⁠https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts⁠

  • Feb 11, 2025 · 1 hr 3 min

    007: Interview With My Partner: A Personal Account On Navigating Our Queer Neurodivergent Relationship

    In this deeply personal and insightful episode, Jes sits down with their partner of five years to have an open and honest conversation about what it's like to build a strong, healthy relationship as two neurodivergent and traumatized individuals. As an autistic ADHDer herself, and with her partner also being autistic and dyspraxic, they've navigated their fair share of unique challenges and triumphs in their relationship. From the unconventional beginnings of their love story, to learning to navigate each other's emotional landscapes, to dividing household responsibilities in a way that plays to their respective strengths - Jes and her partner pull back the curtain on the inner workings of their neurodivergent partnership. Listeners will gain valuable insights on topics like radical acceptance, emotional co-regulation, and the importance of open communication and trust. Jes and her partner also discuss how their past traumas and abusive relationships shaped their current dynamic, and the beauty that can emerge when two people are willing to be vulnerable and meet each other where they're at. Whether the listener is in a neurodivergent relationship themselves, or simply wants to better understand what that experience can look like, this episode offers a rare, unfiltered glimpse into the realities and rewards of loving someone who thinks a little differently. Jes and her partner share their story and the lessons they've learned along the way. (description generated by otter.ai) Links & Resources: AuDHD Summer Camp:https://www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp Jes’s Website:https://www.jesdiverges.com Jes’s Email:⁠jes@jesdiverges.com⁠ Join My Email List:https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram:https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok:https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Substack:https://substack.com/@jesdiverges Transcript Document:https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • Oct 18, 2024 · 49 min

    006: Neuroqueering Your Home With Art: Beyond Dopamine Decorating with Elinor Trier

    In this insightful conversation, host Jes Diverges sits down with artist Elinor Trier to explore the transformative power of art, especially for neurodivergent and queer individuals. Eli shares her personal journey as a visual artist, writer, and podcaster, describing how her work aims to help people who feel different to feel connected, seen, and celebrated. Delving into the science behind colorful artwork, Eli explains how engaging with vibrant art can alter brain chemistry, releasing feel-good neurotransmitters and regulating emotional states. (description generated by otter.ai) Eli’s 5-part guide for choosing art that speaks to your soul: Emotional resonance: something that gives you a little “jolt” of emotion The Joy Test: something that makes you happy or joyful Personal symbolism: motifs, colors, or symbols that remind you of something/ someone important to you, or that you see yourself in Conversation sparkers: can you imagine explaining the piece to someone in a way that feels expansive or use it in a way that helps them understand you better? The Power Up effect: something that reminds you of the power or strength within you, that helps you feel powerful Eli’s Links: Eli’s Website: https://www.elinortrierstudio.com/ Eli’s Newsletter: https://www.elinortrierstudio.com/keepintouch Eli’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/elinortrierstudio Eli’s YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@ZuzusHausofCats Other Links & Resources: Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • Jul 2, 2024 · 28 min

    Bonus Episode: AuDHD Summer Camp Orientation Sampler

    In this special bonus episode of UnShaming AuDHD, I'm sharing the full welcome and orientation module for my upcoming AuDHD Summer Camp Program. Think of this as a little sampler of what you can expect if you join AuDHD Summer Camp. And, even if you don't wind up joining, I fully believe that you'll still benefit from listening to some of the philosophies that I encourage campers to try out. Summer Camp starts on July 5th, and doors are open until August 30th. I hope to see you there! Links: AuDHD Summer Camp: https://www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • Jun 14, 2024 · 19 min

    005: The Tribulation of Transitions

    This episode of UnShaming AuDHD discusses the challenges of transitions for those with ADHD and autism. Jes explains how attention tunnels, autistic inertia, and hyperconnectivity in the brain can make any type of change difficult. They also share a personal experience of struggling after a major life transition of moving into a new house. Advice is provided on how to make transitions easier, such as keeping routines consistent, preparing ahead of time, and showing self-compassion during difficult adjustments. (Episode description partially generated & transcript generated by otter.ai) Links & Resources: AuDHD Summer Camp: https://www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • May 16, 2024 · 47 min

    004: AuDHD Explained

    Have you ever felt like you don't quite fit the mold of a "typical" ADHD or autistic person? In this episode, Jes takes an in-depth look at what it means to be an auDHDer - aka, someone with the ADHD/autistic “combo meal”. Jes breaks down the key differences between ADHD and autism, and how having both can create a truly unique neurotype. Learn about common auDHD experiences like misdiagnosis, emotional regulation challenges, and feeling "not autistic/ADHD enough." Packed with real-life examples and analogies, this episode provides valuable insights into your auDHD brain. And if you found this episode helpful, be sure to check out Jes’s new program: AuDHD Summer Camp! This 6-week virtual program will help you better understand your auDHD brain and set your life up to work with your brain, rather than against it, all while in community with other auDHDers who truly get it. Starts June 24. Link below! (Episode description partially generated & transcript generated by otter.ai) Links & Resources: AuDHD Summer Camp: https://www.jesdiverges.com/audhdsummercamp Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • May 7, 2024 · 51 min

    003: Tarot & Astrology w/ Christian Palmer

    In this episode of UnShaming AuDHD, Jes talks with Christian Palmer about embracing their magical sides. Christian shares how tarot cards helped her process big emotions during difficult times, and Jes reflects on overcoming past shame around spirituality. They discuss using Tarot spreads to clarify thoughts and feelings when internal reflection proves challenging. Christian also details her Harry Styles birth chart deep-dive and D&D campaigns featuring astrological clues. Listeners learn about assigning personal meanings to cards and integrating astrology into daily decisions. Overall, the upbeat conversation explores finding clarity and accommodating neurodivergence through alternative spiritual practices. Episode description and transcript generated by otter.ai. Links & Resources: Christian’s Linktree: https://linktr.ee/pogsandjellotarot Order A Reading From Jes: https://buy.stripe.com/eVag2ufna5B25OgeUX (Four card spread, delivered via PDF, $25) Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • Apr 17, 2024 · 22 min

    002: Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria - What It Is, and Three Rules To Manage It

    In this episode, host Jes Diverges discusses rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD) and how it impacts autistic and ADHD individuals. Jes shares their personal experience with RSD in college and strategies they've developed to manage intense feelings of rejection. Listeners learn about the distinction between rejection sensitivity and RSD, and how frequency, intensity and duration are key factors. Jes also offers reminders on shifting perspectives to cope with anxiety around perceived criticism from others. (Episode description & transcript generated by otter.ai) Articles mentioned: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/24099-rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-rsd https://embrace-autism.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-in-adhd-and-autism/ Links & Resources: Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

  • Apr 4, 2024 · 40 min

    001: Allow Me To Introduce Myself

    In this first episode, host Jes Diverges shares their story from high school through grad school as they navigated life as an undiagnosed autistic ADHDer. Listeners learn about Jes' struggles in college and relationships, including facing bullying from chefs and an emotionally abusive partner. Jes also discusses experiencing burnout in various jobs and their social work program before realizing their calling as a life coach. This personal account provides insight into Jes' journey of self-discovery and overcoming adversity to help empower other neurodivergent individuals. (episode description and transcript generated by otter.ai) Links & Resources: Combo Platter Community: https://www.jesdiverges.com/comboplatter Jes’s Website: https://www.jesdiverges.com Join My Email List: https://www.jesdiverges.com/newsletter Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jesdiverges TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jesdiverges Jes’s Email: jes@jesdiverges.com Transcript Document: https://tinyurl.com/UnshamingAuDHDTranscripts

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