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The Terri Cole Show

Terri Cole

The Terri Cole Show is where psychology meets real life.
Hosted by licensed psychotherapist and bestselling author (Boundary Boss, Too Much and Father Wound coming 10/27/26) Terri Cole, this podcast is for anyone who is ready to understand themselves more deeply, create healthier relationships, and stop repeating patterns that no longer serve them.

With nearly three decades of clinical experience, Terri breaks down complex psychological concepts into practical tools you can actually use. From boundaries, high-functioning codependency, and people-pleasing to attachment, family-of-origin wounds, self-worth, anxiety, and relationship dynamics, each episode is designed to help you connect the dots between what you learned in the past and how you're living today.

You'll hear solo episodes, listener Q&As, and conversations with leading experts in psychology, relationships, wellness, and personal growth.

Because when you understand why you think, feel, and behave the way you do, you have the power to make a different choice.

Tune in to The Terri Cole Show and start creating more freedom, healthier relationships, and a life that thrills and fulfills you.

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36 episodes
a few times a week
Avg 27 min
English

Episodes 36

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#870
Thursday · 34 min· Video
870 Creating a Life of Meaning with John Miles
I sit down with John R. Miles, host of the Passion Struck podcast and author of The Mattering Effect: Creating a Life of Meaning and Worth, to explore what it truly means to feel valued and know that we matter. We discuss how the science of mattering can help us find greater meaning, create more balance, build reciprocal relationships, and develop a deeper sense of belonging and connection in both our personal and professional lives. Get the full show notes at terricole.com/870
#869
Tuesday · 23 min· Video
869 Understanding the Good Girl Syndrome
In this episode, we explore the hidden costs of "good girl syndrome"—the people-pleasing, conflict-avoiding patterns that leave so many women overextended and underappreciated. Learn how these childhood survival strategies become adult liabilities, and practical affirmations and boundary-setting tools to help you reclaim your authentic self without apology. Get the full show notes at terricole.com/869
#868
September 29 · 22 min· Video
868 The Father Wound: Authority & Money
The relationship you had with your father may be influencing your career, earning potential, and financial confidence in ways you have never considered. In this episode, I explore the connection between father wounds, authority figures, and money, helping you recognize how early family dynamics can continue to shape your relationship with success and financial security. Uncover the patterns operating beneath the surface so you can begin untangling what may be holding you back. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/868
#867
September 24 · 32 min· Video
867 Stop Self-Sabotage with Jessica Anne Pressler
In this episode, psychotherapist and debut novelist Jessica Ann Pressler joins me to explore the concept of the "Traitor Within," the part of us formed in childhood that self-sabotages our adult relationships and emotional wellbeing. Drawing on nearly four decades of clinical experience, Jessica unpacks narcissistic abuse, trauma bonding, and why intelligent, self-aware people still stay in toxic relationships. The conversation weaves together insights from her psychological suspense novel, her own personal healing journey, and practical tools for rebuilding self-trust and shedding shame. You can get the show notes at terricole.com/867
#851
September 22 · 22 min· Video
866 Childhood Adaptations + The Father Wound
The coping strategies you developed as a child were brilliant and necessary at the time, but they may now be quietly controlling your adult life in ways you have never examined. In this episode, I walk you through six powerful childhood adaptation archetypes, helping you identify which patterns are keeping you isolated, exhausted, or disconnected from what you truly want. This is an invitation to bring the unconscious into the light so you can finally make different choices. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/866
#865
September 17 · 36 min· Video
865 Raising Conscious Kids with Dr. Shefali
In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Shefali, a clinical psychologist, founder of the Conscious Parenting Movement, and New York Times bestselling author, to discuss her two newly released books: Raising Conscious Daughters and Raising Conscious Sons. Dr. Shefali shares her origin story, growing up in India under a rigid patriarchy before arriving in America at 21 with $300 and one year to build a new life, an experience that fueled her lifelong mission to help individuals break free from unconscious cultural patterns. You can get the show notes at terricole.com/865
#864
September 15 · 22 min· Video
864 Father Wound & HFC
Are you the one who handles everything for all the people? Are you the fixer? The one who rarely needs or asks for help? Are you the one who does all the things for all the people? Be honest with yourself. If so, you may have a father wound that is hiding in plain sight — because the very capability you have keeps this unhealed wound hidden. That is exactly what this episode is about: why the father wound can be especially hard to recognize in high functioning women, how high functioning codependency can keep you stuck in patterns of self-abandonment, and why how you feel and what you want matters as much as what you accomplish. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/864
#863
September 10 · 31 min· Video
863 Build an Empowered Blended Family with Cameron Normand
Build an Empowered Blended Family with Cameron Normand In this episode of The Terri Cole Show, I sit down with nationally recognized stepfamily expert Cameron Normand to explore the unique challenges stepmoms face and why traditional parenting advice often doesn't work for blended families. Cameron shares practical guidance on building relationships with stepchildren, navigating parenting and discipline, setting clear expectations with partners, and managing the stress of stepfamily life. She also explains why it can take four to seven years for a stepfamily to feel cohesive and why moving at the children's pace is essential. Cameron also shares details about her annual Stepmom Summit, a virtual event designed to give stepmoms expert guidance, resources, and a supportive community. The summit starts September 14th, and you can grab a free ticket at terricole.com/stepmomsummit You can get the show notes at terricole.com/863
#862
September 8 · 19 min· Video
862 How the Father Wound Impacts Emotional Safety in Relationships
Having an unhealed father wound impacts your ability to create emotional safety in your relationships. If you grew up in a house where emotional safety was not part of your relationship with your father, calm can feel weird or unfamiliar, and vulnerability can feel risky. Trusting another person to be there for you, if that wasn't your experience, may feel counterintuitive. In this episode, we're exploring how father wounds impact our ability to feel safe in relationships, why calm can feel so unfamiliar, and what emotional safety can look like as we heal. We may have learned to protect ourselves through high-functioning codependency, hyper-vigilance, or hyper-independence. These strategies made sense at the time, but they can keep us from the safety we actually want now. From The Episode: A father wound is a worthiness wound. We may have learned in childhood that we weren't good enough as we were. Without emotional safety from our fathers, we find other ways to protect ourselves: high-functioning codependency, hyper-vigilance, or hyper-independence. When your system is more familiar with hypervigilance than with safety, you may be drawn to relationships that are familiar but not necessarily good. We repeat what we do not repair. If you're not attracting someone who's calm and securely attached, we may need to heal the wound first. Emotional safety is the felt sense that you can be yourself and still belong. You can have needs, say no, and make mistakes without being punished or rejected. I wrote a whole book on father wounds to help you understand how they show up in your relationships, your sense of safety, your self-worth, and the way you give and receive love. If you're ready to start healing those patterns at the root, preorder your copy today. Plus, when you preorder now at https://fatherwoundbook.com, you'll get a free 3-hour virtual healing retreat.
#861
September 3 · 32 min· Video
861 Feel Hot, Healthy, and Unbothered With Liz Tenuto
What if the key to better sleep and less stress wasn't doing more, but moving less? In this episode, I sit down with Liz Tenuto, aka The Workout Witch, to talk about somatic exercises, nervous system regulation, and why so many of us can't sleep or relax. Liz teaches tiny, lazy movements that release stored tension from the body, and she demonstrates three of them during our conversation. We also talk about why standard sleep advice fails trauma survivors, and how dissociation shows up in women who take care of everyone but themselves. If you feel wired but tired and can't remember the last time you felt truly rested, this episode is for you. 00:00 Welcome to The Terri Cole Show 02:29 Liz's Origin Story: Chronic Pain, Bad Sleep & 10 Years of Searching 05:28 Why Somatics Is Not Woo-Woo: The Science & Ancient Roots 08:23 Why Sleep Issues Are So Widespread Right Now 10:08 How to Luxuriate Your Sleep Routine (Especially If You're a Trauma Survivor) 13:39 The Hip-Rocking Exercise That Helps You Fall Asleep 17:14 Fight-Flight vs. Freeze: What Nervous System Dysregulation Actually Looks Like 20:24 What Dissociation Really Means Beyond Just Zoning Out 22:41 Two Somatic Fixes: Ear-Pulling for Dissociation & Forehead-Swiping for Fight-or-Flight 25:15 Inside "When the Body Speaks" & Where to Find Liz you can get the shownotes at terricole.com/861
#860
September 1 · 21 min· Video
860 The Father Wound–Boundary Connection
If setting a boundary feels like you're risking the whole relationship, your unhealed father wound might be why. When the person who was supposed to protect you didn't, you can grow up without the sense that you're even allowed to say no. In this episode, I'm walking through how the father wound shapes your boundaries, the different father archetypes and the specific boundary struggles each one creates, and why so many of us never learned we were allowed to protect ourselves in the first place. Whether your father was absent, critical, emotionally distant, abusive, unreliable, narcissistic, passive, or played favorites, those wounds can make certain boundaries especially difficult. It often comes back to the same things: learning to protect yourself, honoring your needs, and being able to disappoint other people without abandoning yourself. The best part of healing your father wound is that you don't have to keep going along to get along anymore. Not sure if your father wound is affecting your boundaries? Get the journal prompts from this episode to uncover how your father wound may still be shaping your boundaries, relationships, and ability to say no. terricole.com/860 KEY TAKEAWAYS If your father didn't protect you, you may have learned you weren't worth protecting. That belief shapes your boundaries in adulthood. Different father archetypes create different boundary struggles: absent fathers make saying no feel like abandonment, critical fathers make you fear getting it wrong, narcissistic fathers teach you that your needs don't matter. Pleasing, being compliant, achieving to belong — these are the opposite of having healthy boundaries. They kept you safe as a child, but they're not serving you now. You'll never build the life you want if it's built on self-abandonment. You don't need your father's permission or participation to heal your father wound. This work is for you. I wrote an entire book to walk you through this work. Pre-order Father Wound and get access to a free 3-hour virtual retreat with me. fatherwoundbook.com
#859
August 27 · 34 min· Video
859 On Our Knees with Regena (Mama Gena) Thomashauer
What if surrender could help you reconnect with pleasure, heal emotionally, and feel fully alive again? In this powerful conversation, I sit down with Regena Thomashauer to explore surrender, pleasure, self-healing, and emotional healing. We talk about why high-functioning women can become exhausted from trying to control everything, how surrender is different from submission, and what happens when we stop fighting our lives. Regena shares her deeply personal journey from trauma and self-doubt to discovering the power of pleasure, reconnecting with her body, and learning to trust what comes next. If you're ready to let go of control, reconnect with pleasure, and discover a new way to move through burnout and life's difficult moments, this conversation is for you. Find the show notes at terricole.com/859
#858
August 25 · 20 min
858 The Art of Self-Soothing (396 Re-Run)
Let's say you have a rough interaction with someone, a disappointing outcome, or you get bad news–what do you do to help yourself feel better? Do you have a couple of drinks? Maybe smoke a little weed? Or eat a tub of ice cream? No judgment here, but I want to invite you to think about it because many of us confuse self-numbing with self-soothing. In this episode, you'll learn my favorite self-soothing tips, healthy ways to support your nervous system and emotional wellbeing, plus how to create your own self-soothing and stress relief toolkit. Learning how to effectively self-soothe can be life-changing! Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/396
#857
August 20 · 43 min· Video
857 The Power of 'Moving Art' for Mental Health with Louie Schwartzberg
What if beauty could change the way you experience life? In this conversation, I sit down with visionary filmmaker Louie Schwartzberg to talk about gratitude, nature, beauty, wonder, and mental health—and why paying attention to the natural world can help us become more present and connected. Louis shares the story behind his breathtaking films Fantastic Fungi, Gratitude Revealed, and Moving Art, and explains why he believes beauty can be a powerful antidote to a world filled with fear, conflict, and constant bad news. We talk about how nature teaches us to live, why gratitude begins with presence, and what happens when we slow down enough to actually see the beauty that's already around us. If you're feeling overwhelmed by the world, this conversation may give you a completely different way to look at it. Read the show notes for this episode at terricole.com/857
#856
August 18 · 14 min
856 Signs of Abandonment Issues (374 Rerun)
Do you find that you attach unusually quickly to people, whether in friendships or romantic relationships? Do you stay in relationships that you know are bad for you because the thought of being alone scares you more than staying in a bad relationship? Or do you repeatedly find yourself in relationships with unavailable people? If you answered yes to any of these questions, you might have abandonment issues. In this episode, I'm helping you recognize the signs of abandonment issues in adult relationships and reviewing the most common causes of chronic fear of abandonment. Find the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/374
#855
August 11 · 22 min
855 Being Nice to Avoid Conflict Isn't Nice, It's Controlling - Here's Why (714 Rerun)
Are you a nice person? Do you think it's possible to be too nice? Or that wanting to be nice is an excuse some high-functioning codependents hide behind to avoid conflict? In my personal and professional experience, it is possible to be too nice, and it's not great for your relationships. In this episode, we'll explore what it means to be nice, what being too nice looks like, why it matters, and how to shift your behavior to authentic niceness. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/714
August 6 · 40 min· Video
854 Discover Your Anxiety Type with Noelle McWard Aquino
Anxiety doesn't always look like fear — sometimes it looks like control, perfectionism, people pleasing, and doing everything "right." In this episode of The Terri Cole Show, I explore the types of anxiety that often hide beneath high-functioning behaviors, codependency, and the struggle to set healthy boundaries. I sit down with anxiety expert Noelle McWard Akino to explain how anxiety can show up as catastrophizing, control, and distorted beliefs about ourselves. We talk about why high-functioning anxiety can look like success, how overthinking keeps us stuck, and why trying to control everything may actually be a sign that we don't feel safe. Understanding your types of anxiety can help you recognize your patterns, create healthier boundaries, and learn how to respond differently instead of being driven by fear. If you struggle with people pleasing, perfectionism, overthinking, self-doubt, or feeling responsible for everyone and everything, this conversation will help you understand the deeper roots of anxiety and begin your emotional healing journey. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/854
August 5 · 19 min
853 5 Signs your emotional boundaries need work (341 Rerun)
Do you ever feel responsible for the feelings of others? Do you overgive and overfunction? Do you suffer from chronic indecision? If any of those things resonate, today's episode is for you. I am going to share with you five signs that your emotional boundaries need help. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/853
#852
July 30 · 33 min· Video
852 ADHD Regulation with Jenna Free
ADHD nervous system regulation may be the missing piece behind ADHD paralysis, overwhelm, and executive dysfunction. What if many ADHD symptoms aren't just ADHD—but signs of a nervous system stuck in fight or flight? In this episode, I sit down with therapist and ADHD expert Jenna Free to explore a different way of understanding adult ADHD. We discuss why ADHD nervous system regulation can be more effective than relying on productivity hacks alone, how chronic fight-or-flight impacts executive functioning, and why slowing down—not pushing harder—may actually help you get more done. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/852
#851
July 28 · 18 min
851 10 Signs You're Suppressing Your Anger (354 Rerun)
When you're upset with someone about something, do you: Say nothing, but silently keep score? Talk to other people about it? Ice the person out? Send them a passive-aggressive or sarcastic text? If any of those rang a bell, you are not alone which is why in this week's episode, I'm breaking down the top 10 indicators that you might be suppressing and/or unconsciously repressing your anger. Raising your awareness around when you might be acting out feelings of frustration or anger is the first step to expressing yourself in a healthier way. I promise you, learning these skills will improve all of your relationships, including the one you have with yourself. Read the show notes for today's episode at terricole.com/354

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