The Hook Up

triplej

The Hook Up is about love, sex and relationships. We answer your questions, learn things together, cry over heartbreak and normalise shit. Every Tuesday Dee and Pip debate your dating dilemmas and hear your cooked stories. Every Thursday it's the sex ed you never had — we call on an expert to go deep and find answers with Dee.

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39 episodes
Avg 36 min
English

Episodes 39

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August 10 · 52 min
When Your Love Life Is Affected By Gambling
What’s the bet you or someone you know has been affected by gambling? Probably pretty high. Around 3 million Australians experience some sort of gambling harm each year. And 1.2 million Australians are affected by someone else's gambling. And it can have a real impact on your dating or love life. In today’s episode we speak with Luke Bateman, ex-NRL star turned author, about his past addiction and tips on reaching the other side. SHOW NOTES: Lifeline - 13 11 14 Gambling Helpline -
August 5 · 32 min
Chem Sex Parties & Gay Pain w/ Fruit Fly Author Josh Silver
Who has the right to tell queer stories and profit off them? That’s the main theme author Josh Silver explores in his latest book Fruit Fly. The book follows a writer who befriends a young gay addict so she can use his story to write a best seller. In this ep, Dee chats to Josh about his own story as an ex addict, the world of chem sex parties, and why it’s important to share perspectives of gay pain and trauma. SHOW NOTES: Lifeline: 13 11 14 QLife: https://qlife.org.au/ Josh Silver IG:
August 3 · 42 min
Are You Worried You’re Too Vanilla In Sex?
Have you ever felt pressure to have a certain kind of sex? Sex positivity has been an incredible movement which has normalised and destigmatised adventurous, kinky and casual sex. But has that come at a cost? In this ep, we’re joined by guest co-host psychologist and sexologist Laura Lee to unpack whether sex positivity and hook up culture has created a new type of pressure and expectation to perform. SHOW NOTES: A women’s right to say ‘meh’ - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/oc
July 31 · 33 min
BONUS: We've decided to stop sharing a bed (w/ Dee Salmin!)
Surprise! We've got a Saturday Bonus ep for you! You probably heard all about Ben Ilobuchi's situationship troubles in this weeks episode. But did you hear the beef? Dee becomes The Grill's first guest to sear some rogue relationship-specific beefs like ghosting, the ick, and having to sleep in a bed with your partner. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an ABC podcast, produced by triple j. It is
July 29 · 22 min
How To Have The ‘What Are We?’ Chat w/ Erika Ettin
If you’re dating, hooking up with, talking to, or seeing someone but you don’t know where things are going and you don’t know how to bring it up… Dating coach and author Erika Ettin has got you! In this ep, she has some tough love for anyone in a situationship, and will help you have the exclusive/relationship chat. SHOW NOTES: Situationship Ep: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=17Qr9ovC2N0 Erika Ettin Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/alittlenudge/?hl=en DM us your thoughts, questio
July 27 · 56 min
What The Hell Is A Situationship? And Am I In One?
Are you dating or hooking up with someone right now and you’re not really sure what’s going on? It feels like a relationship but you’ve never had the ‘exclusive chat’. You might be in a situationship… In this episode Dee is joined by guest co-host Ben Ilobuchi to unravel the relationship limbo. Show notes: Deding and Describing Situationships: https://www.researchgate.net/publication/378872949_Defining_and_Describing_Situationships_An_Exploratory_Investigation World Health Org: https
July 22 · 30 min
How To Stop Self-Sabotaging w/ Dr Rebecca Ray
Have you noticed a pattern in your love life of ending things when a relationship starts to get serious? Or maybe you pick a fight, or ghost people or never commit to a second date. In this ep we chat to psychologist Dr Rebecca Ray about why we can sometimes self-sabotage and how to break that cycle. SHOW NOTES: Dr Rebecca Ray - https://rebeccaray.com.au/ DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is an
July 20 · 48 min
Is Having A Type Problematic?
Whether it’s someone’s personality, physical attributes, career or aesthetic - sometimes we lean into a “type” of person who we’re attracted to and want to date. But can it ever be discriminatory, fetishisation or limiting to potential relationships? We hear your hot takes and discuss with special guest host Lauren French.
July 15 · 31 min
Life As An Asexual Icon w/ Allie Daisy King
As much as we talk about sex on The Hook Up, for some people they have absolutely no interest in it. That’s what it’s like for writer, fashion girly, podcast host of Booksmart AND asexual baddie Allie Daisy King. In this ep Dee chat’s to Allie about her sexuality journey realising she was ace, what it’s like to live in a world that’s so obsessed with hooking up and dating and why she still loves to read romantasy and smut books. SHOW NOTES: Allie’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/allieda
July 13 · 42 min
What Are Your Relationship ‘Hacks’?
Doing the crossword together every week, writing letters to each other, mandatory date nights, surprise gifts, a commitment to a yearly getaway, and sleeping in separate beds. Whether you’re only a few months in, or years deep - we all have ways to keep the relationship vibes high and healthy. In this ep, we hear your hacks, tricks, rules and methods, to keep your relationship thriving. SHOW NOTES: Harvard University research on importance of Rituals: https://www.library.hbs.edu/working-kno
July 8 · 33 min
Harrison James on Love And Healing After Child Sexual Abuse
Studies show that nearly 30% of Australians have experienced child sexual abuse - a horrific stat that award-winning activist and co-founder of the #YourReferenceAintRelevant campaign - Harrison James has been trying to change. In this ep, Dee chats to Harri about his activism, his survival of child sexual abuse and what’s helped with healing. As well as what he’s learnt from being in a loving and healthy relationship with his fiance Bella Johnston who actually joins us in the studio too! SHO
July 6 · 44 min
Is It Ok To Date Your Friend’s Ex?
Hooking up with your mate’s ex might be one of the biggest violations in a friendship. But is it totally black and white, or are there some grey areas? We hear your hot takes and stories - from you giving your blessing to friends hiding the relationship, and when pursuing the ex has damaged friendships beyond repair and earnt you the nickname sloppy seconds. DM us your thoughts, questions, topics, or to just vent at @triplejthehookup on IG or email us: thehookup@abc.net.au The Hook Up is
July 1 · 25 min
What Is PrEP? And Should I be Taking It?
When you hear about HIV you might think of the AIDs epidemic during the 80s. But so much has changed since then, including the invention of a prevention drug called PrEP. So how does it work? And is it just for gay men? In this chat with Professor Andrew Grulich who’s the head of a HIV Epidemiology and Prevention program, we find out everything you need to know about Pre-Exposure Prophylaxis. SHOW NOTES: Professor Andrew Grulich - https://www.unsw.edu.au/staff/andrew-grulich https://www.k
June 29 · 38 min
What’s It Like To Date A Sex Worker?
They say it’s one of the oldest professions in the world, and with sites like OnlyFans booming in popularity, getting into the industry is easier than ever before - but what is it like to date someone who does sex work? We hear your experiences of dating and relationships from the POV of SWers and as partners - from escorts, full service and erotic dancers, to online adult content creators, phone operators and companion services. SHOW NOTES: Melbourne Sexual Health Centre Annual Report: https:
June 24 · 28 min
Sex, Intimacy And Disability w/ Madeleine Stewart
Over 20% of Australians live with a disability yet there’s still so much stigma and misconceptions when it comes to their sex lives. That’s something comedian and host Madeleine Stewart is trying to change in a new doco. We chat about what she’s learnt about desire and pleasure - through her own experience as well as those she interviewed for the show. SHOW NOTES: Compass episode - Intimate Access: https://iview.abc.net.au/show/compass/series/40/video/RN2511H011S00 Maddie’s Instagram: https
June 22 · 48 min
Freud, Pavlov's Dog & The DSM: The Evolution Of Psychology
Did you know psychology has only existed for 147 years? For such a young science, it’s had a huge impact on humanity and how we understand relationships, from Freudian theories to the pop psych infographics we see on social media every day. So we wanted to investigate it - where psychology came from, how it’s evolved throughout time, some of the biggest myths and misconceptions, and what the future of psychology could look like. SHOW NOTES: A Brief History Of Psychology: https://www.verywellm
June 17 · 30 min
Why Some Men Are Threatened By Successful Women In Dating
Research shows women are out performing men in education, and are buying more houses - but at what cost to their love lives? We speak to author Stefanie O’Connell about her book The Ambition Penalty and her viral Guardian article about how more single women are buying more houses and how men aren’t responding well. SHOW NOTES: Is Your Partner Intimidated By Your Success Podcast: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oAHdxsrCrRg Guardian article - https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13
June 15 · 42 min
Is Your Partner Intimidated By Your Success?
Success looks different for everyone. Maybe you own property, or have built a great career. Maybe you’re highly educated, well travelled, creative, ambitious or wealthy. But sometimes thriving in life can impact dating and relationships. We hear your stories, particularly as women, about when your success has become a problem when dating. SHOW NOTES: Single women are buying more houses. The men they are dating are not responding well: https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2026/may/13/women-
June 10 · 24 min
What You Need To Know Before You Say I Love You
Saying I love you to someone can be such a huge thing - so how do you know when you actually feel it? And when is the right time to say it? Plus how do you deal when the person you love doesn’t say it back. We answer all your questions about declaring your love with couples therapist Megan Kozak.

Showing 21–39 of 39 episodes