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The Forties Formula | Perimenopause, Lifestyle & Health for Women Over 40

Amanda Lim & Jasmin Dhillon

The Forties Formula is a weekly podcast on perimenopause, menopause, hormones, and health for women in their 40s — covering weight loss, sleep, low libido, ADHD, burnout, longevity and the body changes no one explains. Award-winning: Best Health & Wellness Podcast in Asia 2025, Podcast of Impact at The Makers & Shapers Awards 2026, and featured by CNA as one of Singapore's best podcasts for women.

We blend science, soul, and a little bit of sass to help you thrive in your forties and beyond.

Meet your hosts:

  • Jasmin Dhillon — health strategist at Eat with Jasmin, mum of three boys, and forever curious about what it really takes to feel good in this season of life.

  • Amanda Lim — metabolic health coach, director at LIFT Clinic, and mom to three littles, here to help you ditch the fluff and get real about kicking a*s in your forties.

Free Resource for Women in Their 40s

Join our wonderful community of women and receive our weekly newsletter Forty Tude!

https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Receive a free wellness guide as a thank you.

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  • #132
    Wednesday · 55 min

    1 in 7 Women Will Face Breast Cancer. Know These Warning Signs

    Breast cancer signs and symptoms every woman should know. Breast surgeon and breast cancer survivor Dr Liz O'Riordan explains how to check your breasts, mammograms and how to lower your risk. What happens when a breast surgeon finds a lump in her own breast? In this Breast Cancer Awareness Month episode of The Forties Formula podcast, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim are joined by Dr Liz O'Riordan, a UK breast surgeon diagnosed with stage 3 breast cancer at 40, which has since come back twice. Liz shares what it was like to go from surgeon to patient overnight, the fear of recurrence, and losing her mum to cancer. Then she walks us through a breast self-exam, the warning signs that are not a lump, whether mammograms are safe, why breast cancer is rising in younger women, and the lifestyle changes that can reduce your risk. KEY TAKEAWAYS One in seven women will get breast cancer in their lifetime, and risk rises with age. Breast cancer is not just a lump. Look for skin colour changes, dimpling, a nipple that has pulled in, a rash, and clear or bloody discharge. Check your breasts and armpits every month. If a change is still there after a week or two, see your doctor. Breast pain on its own is very rarely a sign of breast cancer. Mammograms can find cancers before you can feel them. Regular exercise can reduce the risk of several cancers by 30 to 40%. If you are young and worried, say it clearly: "I'm worried I could have breast cancer." CHAPTERS 0:00 Breast Cancer Awareness Month 0:28 A breast surgeon's breast cancer diagnosis 2:04 Going from surgeon to patient 3:03 The psychological impact of cancer 4:34 How cancer affects your family 5:14 When the cancer came back 7:08 Was it my fault? 7:41 Alcohol, lifestyle and breast cancer risk 9:05 Losing her mum to bone cancer 12:18 One in seven women: breast cancer statistics 13:14 How to check your breasts 14:16 Warning signs to look for in the mirror 15:50 Nipple changes, rashes and discharge 17:22 Is breast pain a sign of breast cancer? 18:27 How to examine your breasts and armpits 20:22 Are mammograms safe? 21:42 Breast cancer in younger women 22:58 Why is breast cancer rising? 25:50 Metabolic health and diet 27:25 Lifestyle changes after a cancer diagnosis 28:38 Exercise and reducing the risk of recurrence ABOUT THE GUEST Dr Liz O'Riordan is a UK breast surgeon, author and breast cancer survivor. ABOUT YOUR HOSTS Jasmin Dhillon, Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach. Instagram: @eat.with.jasmin Amanda Lim, Metabolic Health Coach. Instagram: @coachamanda When did you last check your breasts? Tell us in the comments and subscribe to The Forties Formula. This episode is general information, not medical advice. If you notice a change in your breasts, see your doctor. #BreastCancerAwareness #BreastCancer #BreastCancerSymptoms #BreastSelfExam #WomenOver40 #TheFortiesFormula

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  • Monday · 9 min

    Motherhood vs Fatherhood: Bridging the Gap in Family Responsibilities | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Motherhood isn't just physically demanding, it's mentally exhausting. Beyond caring for children, many mothers carry the invisible responsibility of managing family schedules, remembering appointments, planning meals, organizing daily life, and keeping everyone on track. In this clip from The Forties Formula, counselor, walk-and-talk therapist, and fatherhood advocate Simon Parkin shares why this "mental load" often goes unnoticed, how it creates resentment in relationships, and what fathers can do to become more supportive partners. In this clip: * Why the invisible mental load affects so many mothers * Why dads often don't realize how much moms are managing * How better communication can strengthen relationships * Small shifts that create a more balanced family life Watch the full episode for a deeper conversation on fatherhood, relationships, emotional wellbeing, and building healthier families. About The Forties Formula Hosted by Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim, The Forties Formula explores the realities of health, relationships, and personal growth for women navigating life after 40 through honest conversations with experts and inspiring guests. Follow the hosts: Jasmin Dhillon – Integrated Health Strategist & Health Coach https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim – Metabolic Health Coach https://www.instagram.com/coachamandalim/?hl=en Support the podcast: If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe, share this clip, and consider supporting the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Sponsor Love Indus Use code TFF for 21% off https://loveindus.com #MentalLoad #Motherhood #Parenting #Fatherhood #Relationships #MomMentalHealth #EmotionalLabor #FamilyLife #WorkingMoms #TheFortiesFormula

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  • #131
    September 30 · 1 hr 1 min

    How To Fit Strength Training Into A Busy Life - Mother of 3 Reveals

    Strength training for women over 40 can keep you strong, capable and independent at 80. Strength coach Elizabeth Davies, author of Training for Your Old Lady Body, shares her tips for healthy ageing. What if your fitness goal was being able to get off the floor, carry your own bags and keep saying yes to life at 80? In this episode of The Forties Formula podcast, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim are joined by Elizabeth Davies to rethink what women are training for, and why our future independence deserves attention now. For decades, women have been sold smaller waists, summer bodies and before and after photos. Elizabeth offers a different focus: building a body that can keep doing the things you need and love as you grow older. IN THIS EPISODE, WE DISCUSS Training for capability and independence as you age Why it isn't too late to begin strength training Fitting shorter workouts around work and family Mum guilt and modelling self-care for your children Strength, cardio, power and progressive overload Letting go of perfectionism and all or nothing thinking CHAPTERS 0:00 Train for your old lady body 1:00 Why women are sold summer body goals 5:41 What do you want to be able to do at 80? 9:44 Is it too late to start lifting? 13:30 Finding time to exercise 18:27 Mum guilt and making time for yourself 23:14 Rethinking before and after photos 29:11 What if you don't enjoy lifting? 37:34 Training priorities in your 40s, 50s and 60s 40:15 Power training and moving quickly 43:53 The mindset for lifelong fitness 51:15 Hot or hype: fitness beliefs challenged 57:24 Elizabeth's Forties Formula ABOUT THE GUEST Elizabeth Davies is a personal trainer, founder of the training platform This Woman Lifts and author of Training for Your Old Lady Body. Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thiswomanlifts/ ABOUT YOUR HOSTS Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ THANK YOU TO OUR SPONSORS This episode is brought to you by For Youth. Their Clear Protein+ is a clear recovery drink you stir into cold water after training. According to Each sachet provides 17 g of protein, 3 g of creatine and electrolytes, with 74 calories. Shop at https://www.foryouth.co and use code FORTY at checkout, valid for a one-time purchase. Love Indus: use code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com SUPPORT THE PODCAST For more from The Forties Formula, join our crew and get our weekly FORTYTUDE newsletter straight to your inbox: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Buy Us a Coffee: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee #StrengthTraining #WomenOver40 #TheFortiesFormula #ElizabethDavies #HealthyAgeing #FitnessOver40

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  • September 27 · 9 min

    Your Relationship is Failing These Green Flags | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Have you ever found yourself questioning your relationship in your 40s... and wondered if something is wrong? In this clip from The Forties Formula, relationship coach Yana Fry explores why so many women begin reassessing their relationships during midlife. She explains how changing priorities, greater self-awareness, and shifting emotional needs can make women see their relationships through a completely different lens—and why this doesn't necessarily mean the relationship is failing. Whether you're happily partnered, feeling disconnected, or simply trying to understand yourself better, this conversation offers thoughtful insights into one of the biggest transitions many women experience after 40. 🎧 Watch the full episode for more on communication, intimacy, the invisible mental load, dating after 40, relationship red flags, couples therapy, and building healthier relationships in midlife. About your hosts: Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ About the guest: Yana Fry is a relationship coach, psychologist, and educator who helps women create healthier, more fulfilling relationships through self-awareness, emotional growth, and practical relationship tools. https://www.instagram.com/yanafry Learn more about Yana's work: https://love.yanafry.com Support the podcast: If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone navigating relationships, dating, or life after 40. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Our sponsors: Love Indus Use code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com #TheFortiesFormula #RelationshipsAfter40 #MidlifeRelationships #DatingAfter40 #SelfWorth #EmotionalIntimacy #Perimenopause #Women'sHealth #RelationshipAdvice #YanaFry

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  • #130
    September 23 · 26 min

    5 Health Claims Women Over 40 Need to Question

    Can creatine help with perimenopause brain fog? Could an allergy pill ease hot flushes? And why does your body feel different when your weight hasn’t changed? In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim reunite in London to unpack five health claims making headlines and circulating on social media. From strength training and heart health to creatine and viral menopause hacks, they explore what’s behind the claims, where evidence is still developing, and what deserves a closer look. With so much conflicting advice aimed at women over 40, knowing what to believe can feel overwhelming. This conversation explores why the details behind a headline matter — and why your health is about more than a number on the bathroom scale. Jasmin and Amanda discuss the headline linking resistance training with lower heart attack risk, including the limitations of observational research. They also examine the trend of combining allergy and heartburn medication for menopause symptoms, separating a proposed explanation from evidence that a treatment works. Next, they explore creatine claims around muscle, bone and brain health before discussing body composition during perimenopause. The conversation covers fat redistribution, muscle function, grip strength and how these relate to metabolic health. Whether you’re considering creatine, noticing a changing waistline or feeling overwhelmed by menopause advice, this episode offers questions to take beyond your social media feed. In this episode, we discuss: Strength training, heart health and the 44% risk-reduction headline The viral allergy-pill menopause hack and its evidence gaps Creatine claims around muscle, bone and brain fog Why a stable weight doesn’t tell the whole story Tracking sleep, mood and changes in how you feel Visceral fat, grip strength and diabetes risk How muscle and exercise relate to glucose regulation Chapters 0:00 Five health claims: the headlines 0:37 Welcome from London 1:15 Strength training and heart health 4:13 What observational research tells us 5:24 The viral allergy-pill menopause hack 7:38 Is there evidence behind it? 9:50 Creatine: muscle, bone and brain fog 15:08 Same weight, different body 18:07 Tracking symptoms beyond the scale 18:57 Muscle strength, visceral fat and diabetes 20:43 Measuring hand grip strength 21:36 Grip strength and longevity 24:03 Muscle, exercise and blood sugar 25:42 Final takeaways About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. Instagram: @eat.with.jasmin Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. Instagram: @coachamanda Which claim have you seen in your feed? Tell us below and subscribe to The Forties Formula. For general education. Discuss medication, supplements and treatment changes with a qualified healthcare professional. #TheFortiesFormula #Perimenopause #WomenOver40

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  • September 20 · 8 min

    Postpartum In Your 40s: What You Really Need To Know

    Postpartum recovery for women in their 40s: what no one tells you. Sports medicine physician Dr. Lara Morgan joins Jasmin and Amanda to explain why the six-week clearance means nothing and what real recovery actually looks like. Most women are cleared at six weeks and sent straight back to running, lifting, and HIIT. No one tells them that decision can affect their body for the next three to four decades. If something has felt off since you had kids, this episode is for you. In this episode you will learn why the bounce back narrative is physically damaging, what it means to recover like an athlete, why leaking and pelvic floor issues are common but never normal, and why it is never too late to rebuild. About the guest: Dr. Lara Morgan is a sports medicine physician who has worked with elite athletes at the Cleveland Cavaliers and USC. She applies the same evidence-based recovery model used in professional sport to postpartum women and mothers at every stage. Find her on Instagram at @sportdrmorgan. Chapters: 0:00 Postpartum recovery and why the six-week clearance means nothing 1:42 How to recover like an athlete even if you were never one 3:37 Is it too late to fix your body years after having kids 5:44 Why incontinence after pregnancy is never normal About your hosts: Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamandalim/ Want to stay across everything we are doing? FortyTude is our newsletter where we share what we are reading, testing, and talking about between episodes. It is the easiest way to stay in the loop. Join us here: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Listen to the full episode: YouTube: https://youtu.be/uFyZv-_wH8c Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/3quPHkvuW2fqfaxuWmKJf1 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/sg/podcast/the-forties-formula/id1724267923?i=1000774105535 Support the podcast: If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share with someone who needs to hear this. You can also support the show here: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Thank you to our sponsor: Love Indus. Use code TFF for 21% off: https://loveindus.com Keywords: postpartum recovery, pelvic floor, diastasis recti, C-section recovery, postpartum fitness, women in their 40s, perimenopause, bounce back myth, sports medicine, belly binding, core strength after pregnancy, postpartum exercise, women's health over 40, postnatal recovery, postpartum body, rebuild after pregnancy, mum fitness, strong mum, Dr Lara Morgan, postpartum hormones

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  • #129
    September 16 · 54 min

    Why Your Personality Isn't Actually Yours (And What Is)

    In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim are joined by coaching psychologist Dr Saba Hasanie to explore an uncomfortable question: how much of what we call “personality” is actually adaptation? Why does this matter? Because patterns such as people-pleasing, perfectionism, self-sabotage and the need for control may reflect behaviours we learned in childhood. In midlife, we can start questioning whether those patterns still serve us. Drawing on her book, The Blueprint to Leadership, Dr Hasanie introduces six childhood “fields”—rules, trust, self, belonging, emotions and world—and explores how they influence adult behaviour. Whether you’ve caught yourself saying “that’s just who I am” or you’re struggling to break a familiar pattern, this conversation explores what it takes to choose a different way forward. In this episode, we discuss: • Why some personality traits may be learned adaptations • The six childhood fields and their influence on adult behaviour • Why siblings can experience the same household differently • What can sit beneath self-sabotage and people-pleasing • Why awareness alone may not create lasting change • The grief that can accompany letting go of an old identity Chapters: 0:00 Why does my personality feel fake? 3:41 Who is Dr Saba Hasanie? 4:05 Is personality genetic or learned? 10:18 Who was your first boss? 13:36 What are the six fields of childhood development? 17:44 Why do siblings have different childhoods? 20:23 How to look at your childhood without blaming your parents 24:32 Is optimism genetic? 29:42 Why does midlife feel like a crisis? 32:44 Why can’t I change even though I’m aware of the problem? 42:36 Why do people resist change even when it’s hurting them? 45:24 What does it mean to grieve your old identity? 54:54 How to reinvent yourself in your 40s About our guest: Dr Saba Hasanie is a Coaching Psychologist, ICF Master Certified Coach and Managing Director of OSC Leadership Development. Get The Blueprint to Leadership Visit her website About your hosts: Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. Follow Jasmin Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. Follow Amanda Support the podcast: Follow and share this episode with someone navigating a major life transition. Buy us a coffee Thank you to our sponsors: For Youth Explore The Forties Formula System. Use code TF35 for up to 35% off storewide. Shop For Youth Love Indus Use code TFF for 21% off. Shop Love Indus Keywords: Dr Saba Hasanie, personality, childhood adaptations, people-pleasing, perfectionism, self-sabotage, midlife, identity, emotional patterns, personal growth, self-awareness, behaviour change, childhood experiences, boundaries, coaching psychology, The Blueprint to Leadership, women over 40, The Forties Formula podcast.

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  • September 13 · 8 min

    Why Doctors Are Finally Renaming PCOS (And What It Means for You)

    PCOS and perimenopause: why your symptoms get worse in your 40s. Dr Sital Khistriya explains insulin resistance, the symptoms missed in slim women, skin markers, and why menopause does not switch PCOS off. This is The Forties Formula In Focus, a short deep dive into one part of our conversation with women's health physician Dr Sital Khistriya. Most women are told PCOS is about cysts on the ovaries. The truth is that the real driver sits upstream in insulin resistance, which is why PCOS is being renamed PMOS, poly metabolic ovarian syndrome. In this focus episode we look at who gets missed and why. If you are slim, eat well, and have been told your bloods look normal while your body says otherwise, this one is for you. Dr Sital explains why PCOS shows up differently depending on your ethnicity, the signs on your skin that point to insulin resistance, and why symptoms often get worse in perimenopause rather than better. Chapters 0:00 Why PCOS is diagnosed differently depending on your ethnicity 1:31 The hidden PCOS symptoms that get missed in slim women 3:53 What the dark patches on your skin say about insulin resistance 5:31 Why PCOS gets worse during perimenopause About the guest Dr Sital Khistriya is a UK-trained family physician at Osler Health International in Singapore, based at the Star Vista clinic. She earned her medical degree from the University of Leicester and holds postgraduate qualifications in child health and in sexual and reproductive healthcare, along with membership of the Royal College of General Practitioners. She practised as an NHS and private GP in the UK before moving to Singapore, and her clinical interests span women's health, hormones, fertility, menopause, and lifestyle medicine. About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ Join Fortytude Want more of this straight to your inbox? Fortytude is our newsletter for women who refuse to shrink in their forties. Real talk on hormones, metabolism, and feeling like yourself again, with none of the fluff. Come join us here: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Support the show If you love what we do and want to help us keep making it, you can buy us a coffee here: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Thank you to our sponsor Love Indus. Use code TFF for 21% off: https://loveindus.com Listen to the full episode Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/in/podcast/why-pcos-gets-worse-during-perimenopause-doctor-explains/id1724267923?i=1000776976873&l=te Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3bxJPqNBjVU3BTjn2Wlpa3 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lgq5cTrIUL4

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  • #128
    September 9 · 53 min

    Perimenopause in Ethnic Minorities: Why Symptoms Are Missed | The Forties Formula

    Perimenopause symptoms often present differently in Black, South Asian and East Asian women. South Asian women typically reach menopause between 46 and 48, compared with 50 to 51 in Caucasian women, meaning symptoms can begin in the mid-thirties. Symptoms are more likely to appear as joint pain, body aches, anxiety, insomnia, vaginal dryness and recurrent UTIs rather than hot flushes. Black women in the UK are approximately five times less likely to be prescribed HRT. In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim sit down with Dr Shahzadi Harper to explore how perimenopause affects women differently across ethnicities, and why that matters for diagnosis, treatment and long-term health. They cover why perimenopause can start earlier than most women realise, the higher baseline cardiovascular, metabolic and bone density risks carried by South Asian and Black women, and why East Asian women are wrongly assumed to sail through menopause symptom free. Dr Harper shares her own perimenopause story, including brain fog, fatigue and joint pain with no hot flushes at all, and why she chose HRT and testosterone. The conversation moves into GLP-1s and metabolic health, how to advocate for yourself when a doctor dismisses you, what to do if you cannot or do not want to take HRT, and why common symptoms should never be accepted as normal. Finally, Dr Harper shares her Forties Formula: put yourself first. CHAPTERS 00:00 Why perimenopause is misunderstood 01:53 An ethnic minority lens 06:06 Do clinicians know? 08:02 The hardest stage 13:54 Dr Harper's own story 16:06 Why she chose HRT 17:44 GLP-1s and perimenopause 21:19 Stress, caring and weight 25:58 Metabolic and heart risk 30:57 Access and awareness 33:13 Advocating for yourself 36:23 The many symptoms 40:47 If you can't take HRT 47:38 Stop white-knuckling it 49:16 Relationships and identity 51:32 Her Forties Formula FREE DOCTOR SCRIPT Feel dismissed at your appointment? We have created a free script with exactly what to say and which tests to ask for. https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/script ABOUT OUR GUEST Dr Shahzadi Harper is a GP of over 20 years and founder of The Harper Clinic on Harley Street, specialising in women's health, perimenopause and menopause. ABOUT YOUR HOSTS Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ SUPPORT THE PODCAST Subscribe and share this episode with a woman who needs more support through perimenopause. You can also buy us a coffee: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee OUR SPONSORS Love Indus. Code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com Perimenopause symptoms, perimenopause symptoms age 40, symptoms of perimenopause, perimenopause treatment, perimenopause anxiety, HRT, menopause age by ethnicity, women's health, midlife health.

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  • September 7 · 15 min

    Why Women in Their 40s Snap: Anna Mathur on Anger vs Rage | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Have you ever wondered why something so small can suddenly push you over the edge? In this clip from The Forties Formula, psychotherapist and bestselling author Anna Mathur explains the crucial difference between anger and rage and why understanding it can completely change how you respond to overwhelming emotions. She shares why rage isn't a personality flaw, what it's really trying to communicate, and how recognising the warning signs can help you avoid reaching breaking point. If you've ever thought, "I don't know why I reacted like that," this conversation will help you understand what's happening beneath the surface. 🎧 Watch the full episode for more on perimenopause, emotional burnout, the invisible mental load, repairing relationships after conflict, and practical ways to stop snapping at the people you love. Chapters: 00:00 The kitchen breaking point — a homeschooling mum's rage story 02:15 Anger vs rage: what's the difference 05:30 The pot on the stove — how rage builds when anger's ignored 08:15 Amanda's own anger-management story 11:00 Spotting your early warning signs 13:30 Why we swallow what we're really feeling About your hosts: Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda About the guest: Anna Mathur is a psychotherapist, bestselling author, speaker, and host of The Therapy Edit podcast. She helps people navigate emotional wellbeing with practical, compassionate tools for everyday life. https://www.instagram.com/annamathur Support the podcast: If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Our sponsors: Love Indus Use code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com #TheFortiesFormula #AnnaMathur #Perimenopause #WomensMentalHealth #EmotionalRegulation #Anger #Burnout #MentalLoad #MidlifeWomen #Therapy

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  • #127
    September 2 · 42 min

    Aqua Fitness Is Not Just for Rehab: Why You Need It Now | The Forties Formula

    In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim sit down with Malissa Sander, founder of Aqua Tula, to challenge the idea that women in their 40s need to train harder to stay fit. Malissa shares her journey from childhood anorexia and an unhealthy relationship with exercise to rebuilding her body through water-based fitness and strength training. After losing muscle, suffering injuries and developing osteoporosis, she learned to approach movement differently, prioritising strength, recovery and a sustainable relationship with her body. The conversation explores why the “push harder” approach can be counterproductive in midlife, and why Malissa’s Three Ws; weights, water and walking form the foundation of her approach. Chapters: 00:00 Malissa’s story: from anorexia to strength 03:06 Anorexia, perfectionism and body image 04:47 When exercise pushed her body too far 05:19 Rebuilding through water and weights 07:21 Discovering aqua and strength training 09:52 The Three Ws: weights, water and walking 11:22 Combining water, mobility, cardio and strength 12:57 The biggest myths about aqua fitness 13:59 Blue Mind Theory and the brain on water 14:36 Why hard training can feel easier in the pool 15:30 Building community through movement 17:19 Aqua Tula as an adaptable fitness system 18:21 The calling behind Aqua Tula 19:51 How the Aqua Tula method was created 20:21 What does “Aqua Tula” mean? 20:39 What to expect in your first class 22:03 Who can benefit from aqua fitness? 23:24 Is aqua fitness for men too? 24:41 Pregnancy, postpartum and C-section recovery 25:48 Exercise and postpartum depression 29:40 Do you need to know how to swim? 31:10 Body confidence and getting into the pool 32:36 Reconnecting with your body through movement 34:48 Hot or Hype 37:04 Where to find Aqua Tula 37:23 Malissa’s 40s Formula About the guest: Malissa Sander is the founder of Aqua Tula, a boutique water-based fitness method combining HIIT, strength, mobility and flexibility — designed for all ages and fitness levels. Based in Singapore, Malissa has trained a community of over 450 women and works with everyone from perimenopausal women managing joint pain and inflammation, to pre and postnatal clients, to elite athletes. Her method is built on the belief that exercise does not have to be painful to be effective. Follow Malissa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aqua.tula/reels Find out more and book a class: https://www.aquatula.com About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ Support the podcast If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone navigating a major life transition or learning to let go of a version of themselves. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee

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  • August 30 · 9 min

    Perimenopause Weight Gain: Why Fitness Over 40 Needs a Completely Different Approach | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Perimenopause weight gain, fat loss over 40, and why everything you have been doing has stopped working — this conversation is for you. Sara May Garcia is a fitness coach and co-founder of Bootique Gym in Singapore. She gained 8kg in two months — eating the same, training the same. She is a professional. She knew exactly what to do. And it still was not working. In this clip from The Forties Formula, Sara shares what was actually happening in her body, why perimenopause weight gain hits differently, and what finally changed — not just physically, but mentally. Topics covered: perimenopause weight gain, perimenopause symptoms, menopause weight loss, strength training for women, fat loss over 40, fitness over 40, losing weight over 40, perimenopause and mindset, muscle loss from undereating, sustainable fat loss for women in their 40s. Chapters: 0:00 Why do women in their 40s struggle to lose weight even when doing everything right? 2:22 How does mindset affect fat loss during perimenopause? 4:14 Why has my exercise routine stopped working after 40? 6:16 How do I get out of a weight loss plateau in perimenopause? If your doctor has told you you are too young or dismissed your symptoms, we built a free script to help you walk into that appointment and get taken seriously: thefortiesformula.com/script 🎧 Listen to the full episode: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-biggest-fat-loss-mistake-women-make-in/id1724267923?i=1000771063153&l=zh-Hant-TW Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3X8Xvigf3OVbjEJqW1HuFX?si=bG8xyZknSESnPcj13zoO-Q YouTube: youtu.be/BgPaWVrqhGs Or search The Forties Formula wherever you get your podcasts. Support the show: buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Sponsors: The Meat Club — use code TFF20 for $20 off your first order. themeatclub.com.sg Love Indus — use code TFF for 21% off. loveindus.com About Sara May Garcia: Fitness coach and co-founder of Bootique Gym Singapore, helping people build strength, improve body composition and create sustainable fitness habits. instagram.com/saramayfit About your hosts: Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist helping women in their 40s navigate hormones, gut health and nutrition. instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. instagram.com/coachamandalim #perimenopause #perimenopausesymptoms #perimenopauseweightgain #menopause #menopauseweightloss #fitnessover40 #strengthtrainingforwomen #weightlossover40 #womenover40 #womenshealth #fatloss #strengthtraining #menopausefitness #thefortiesformula #podcast

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  • #126
    August 26 · 57 min

    Why You Feel So Lost in Your 40s (It’s Not Just Anxiety) | The Forties Formula

    In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim talk grief, mental health and the losses women in their 40s carry but rarely name, with therapist Sapna Makwana Hanspal. For women in their 40s, grief isn't only about losing someone. It can come from a changing identity, a changing body, fertility ending, a dream that didn't happen, a relationship changing, or realising you've outgrown a version of yourself. This conversation looks at why we don't always recognise these experiences as grief, why some forms carry shame, and how cultural expectations can make certain losses harder to acknowledge. They discuss grief connected to ageing parents, divorce, motherhood and the lives our parents may never have had the chance to live. Sapna also shares her own experience as a third culture kid, and how identity, loss and belonging eventually led her from a 20-year career in finance into psychotherapy. The conversation covers how grief can show up as anxiety, burnout, anger and exhaustion, how patterns can be carried across generations, and why grief doesn't need to be got over. It needs to be integrated into our lives. Chapters 00:00 The grief we don't realise we're carrying 02:02 Are women in their 40s grieving? 03:20 Disenfranchised grief 04:05 Grieving a changing identity 06:25 Grieving the end of fertility 07:02 Gender disappointment and the loss of a dream 10:12 Grief connected to our parents 11:07 The sandwich generation and ageing parents 14:27 Divorce and hidden grief 17:29 Anxiety, burnout, rage and exhaustion 20:30 How to support someone who is grieving 23:56 The five stages of grief 25:57 Integrating grief into your life 28:04 Growing up as a third culture kid 30:15 From finance to psychotherapy 32:32 Can grief be passed between generations? 34:31 Grieving the life our parents didn't get to live 37:02 The grief of a life never lived 38:42 Reconnecting with a lost part of yourself 40:50 Practical ways to work through grief 42:17 When your body knows before your mind 45:02 Can movement and self-care help? 47:51 Everyone has their own timeline 50:23 Focusing on what you can control 51:40 Hot or Hype: 55:36 — Sapna's 40s Formula About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ Support the podcast If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone navigating a major life transition or learning to let go of a version of themselves. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee Thank you to our sponsors For Youth Support your skin, recovery, sleep and longevity with The Forties Formula System. Use code TF35 for up to 35% off storewide. https://www.foryouth.co/go/the-forties-formula-system Love Indus Use code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com

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  • August 23 · 11 min

    Women Over 40: You're Probably Wearing the Wrong Bra Size | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Here's the updated full description: Your headaches, neck pain, and poor posture might not be perimenopause. They might be your bra. In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin and Amanda sit down with Caroline Warren, founder of Supporting Eve — Singapore's specialist bra fitting boutique — for a conversation that will make you want to check your bra the moment you finish listening. Most women have never had a professional bra fitting. Most are guessing their size. And according to Caroline, 80 to 95% of the women who walk through her door are in the wrong size bra — not slightly off, significantly off. We cover everything nobody taught us. Why your black bra is a smaller size than your white one. Why your straps are not actually supporting you. What the centre of your bra should be doing against your chestbone. How a bra that doesn't fit is linked to migraines, shoulder tension, forward posture, and lost confidence. And why the Victorian sizing system that still governs every bra size you have ever worn makes almost no sense for a modern body. Caroline also shares her own experience of going through the menopause at 38, how her body changed, and why the conversation around bras, breast health, and body changes in midlife is one women are simply not having enough. If you have ever whipped your bra off the moment you get home and thought that was just normal — this episode is for you. 👉 Watch the full episode here: https://youtu.be/DCJpoPVSd1s CHAPTERS: 00:00 Intro: Is Your Bra Causing Your Pain? 00:17 Why C-Cup & Above Need Real Support 01:36 Is It Hormones or Is It Your Bra? Headaches, Neck & Posture 02:21 Why No One Ever Taught Us How Bras Should Fit 03:38 Why Store Tape Measures Get It Wrong 04:59 What to Expect in a Proper Bra Fitting 05:10 The Fit by Sight Method Explained 06:07 The 80% Rule: Your Band Does The Work, Not Your Straps 07:44 Test 1: The Band Test — The 3-5cm Rule 08:30 Test 2: The Centre Gore Must Sit Flush 09:02 Why a D Is Not a D — Cup Size Changes With Band Size 11:10 Watch the Full Episode with Caroline Warren ABOUT CAROLINE WARREN & SUPPORTING EVE Caroline Warren is the founder of Supporting Eve, Singapore's specialist bra fitting boutique. Supporting Eve carries the widest bra size range in Singapore — A to K cup, 28 to 44 band — and uses a fit by sight technique rather than a tape measure, because no two bodies are the same. 📍 Cluny Court, Bukit Timah — opposite Botanic Gardens MRT, Second Floor 🕐 Open seven days a week, 10am — 7pm 🌐 supportingeve.sg FIND US HERE 🎧 Search The Forties Formula wherever you get your podcasts 📥 Download our free wellness guide: https://preview.mailerlite.io/preview/2156555/sites/185865618324457283/the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin-wn3zmn TAGS: bra fitting guide, perimenopause symptoms, women's health, bra fitting, signs of perimenopause, menopause, womens health, neck pain, back pain relief, midlife women, women over 40, the forties formula, supporting eve, bra size, breast health

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  • #125
    August 19 · 51 min

    The Real Reason Your Relationships Keep Breaking Down and How to Finally Fix It

    Your reaction is never about what just happened. When something small sets you off — a look, a tone, a moment that should not matter — it is rarely about the moment itself. In your 40s, life becomes an explosive combination of change: your body, your relationships, your sense of self, all shifting at once. Conflict is quietly building — with yourself, with the people closest to you, with who you used to be. This week, Avni Martin — ICF Master Certified Coach, founder of The Martin Institute and author of Happy Ever After — joins Jasmin and Amanda to explain where conflict actually comes from, why it gets louder in midlife, and what it is trying to tell you. We cover the three parts behind every conflict, why your perception is not the truth, what your childhood needs have to do with your biggest relationship triggers, and how to train the emotional muscle that changes everything. Avni also shares a deeply personal story about conflict with her teenage daughter — and how what looked like a battle turned out to be grief. 00:00 The quieter battle of your 40s 02:15 Why midlife creates internal conflict 03:22 Is conflict different for our generation 05:30 The three things behind every conflict 07:17 Why relational intelligence matters 08:45 Learning to think about how we think 09:08 When two people talk but nobody listens 10:08 Why thinking long-term changes your reactions 11:47 Training your conflict muscle 12:25 Conflict is the messenger 15:12 Your perception is not the truth 16:03 How beliefs shape everything you see 17:23 The role of empathy in conflict 17:39 Why small things trigger big reactions 20:40 The subconscious volcano 21:16 The childhood needs behind your triggers 23:11 We are meaning-making machines 24:03 Upgrading your inner programming 27:08 How inner work changes conflict 27:41 Avni's journey from zero self-worth to here 31:50 The HAPPY Coaching System 34:48 When habits live in the subconscious 40:06 The HAPPY System and conflict explained 41:14 Why pausing before action changes everything 44:27 Conflict with a teenage daughter 46:05 The grief underneath the conflict 47:38 From holding on to letting go Avni Martin is an ICF Master Certified Coach, founder of The Martin Institute and creator of the HAPPY Coaching System. Get her book: https://amzn.asia/d/0d8zVnO6 Find her on IG: https://www.instagram.com/avni.martin/ Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist helping women in their 40s navigate hormones, gut health and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach helping women build strength and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamandalim/ For Youth — up to 35% off the Forties Formula bundle plus a free bottle of Unwind: https://www.foryouth.co/go/the-forties-formula-system Cosy Earth — up to 31% off with code TFF Love Indus — 21% off with code TFF: https://loveindus.com Support the show: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee

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  • August 16 · 13 min

    The Toxic Boss That Made Her a Better Leader in Her 40s | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Are you in your 40s, successful on paper, but quietly wondering if any of it still fits? This episode explores why the most powerful leadership decision a woman can make in midlife might be choosing to walk away. We're joined by leadership adviser and author Sally J. Clarke, who interviewed 40 women for her new book, Walk Away: Step Out to Step Up. She shares real stories of leaders who left toxic corporate cultures, misaligned roles, and outdated versions of success to build something more aligned — including women who went on to found and run their own companies. We talk through how to tell the difference between an emotional reaction and a strategic decision to leave, why fear can act as a compass rather than a warning sign, and how Sally's concept of "integrity capital" — doing what you say you'll do — shapes trust in both leadership and family life. We also cover the burnout and health warning signs several of Sally's interviewees ignored before they made a change, and what separates a boss who tears people down from one who builds them up. ▶ Listen to the full episode: search The Forties Formula & Sally J. Clarke Topics covered: midlife career change, toxic leadership, workplace burnout, executive coaching, strategic career decisions, women in leadership, corporate culture Chapters: 00:00 Burnout, illness, and the wake-up call 02:30 How a toxic boss shaped a better leader 05:00 "Integrity capital" — do what you say you'll do 08:00 Walking away from a bad deal 10:30 Patterns across 40 women's stories 12:30 Walking away from expectation, not just a job

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  • #124
    August 12 · 55 min

    Nervous System Regulation for Women in Their 40s

    Nervous system regulation, behaviour change and women's health in your 40s: Behaviour Change Strategist Leila Foster joins Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim on The Forties Formula to explore why lasting change is so hard, even when we genuinely want it. Leila works at the intersection of behaviour change, wellness and nervous-system regulation, drawing on personal experience as a mother of three, a new mum and a business owner with her husband. They explore why our brains return to familiar patterns, how chronic stress affects our ability to change, why expectations create resentment, and how to recognise when a trigger isn't actually about you. Leila also opens up about divorce, blended family life, shared parenting and running a business with her husband. Jasmin and Amanda share their very different experiences with 9D Breathwork. Finally, Leila shares her 40s formula: stop doing what you're told, make micro-adjustments, know your season, hold your paradox, ask for help, and never outsource your decisions. Nervous system regulation, neuroplasticity, expectations & resentment, inherited trauma, Breathwork, blended families & divorce, sharing the parenting load, conflict resolution Chapters: 00:00 Why knowing isn't enough to create change 02:17 Your nervous system on a normal Tuesday 04:01 "Is it about you?" 05:30 Expectations, stress and resentment 08:17 The biology of inherited patterns 11:08 Stress, the brain and old programming 15:03 Neuroplasticity and the six pillars of wellness 15:55 Is the problem the fish or the fish tank? 16:43 Breaking out of emotional spirals 21:35 What happens during 9D Breathwork 25:09 Why the same experience affects us differently 28:58 Divorce and building a blended family 35:05 Sharing the parenting load and running a business with your spouse 44:15 The calendar invite that can save a relationship 47:00 Leila's 40s Formula About our guest Leila Foster is a Behaviour Change Strategist and Wellness Architect working at the intersection of behaviour change, wellness and nervous-system regulation. https://www.instagram.com/birthbossmama/ About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon, Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach for women in their 40s. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim, Metabolic Health Coach focused on strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ Get our free Wellness Guide Free digital wellness guide plus future episodes straight to your inbox: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Support the podcast Enjoyed this? Subscribe and share it. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/products/buy-us-a-coffee Thank you to our sponsors For Youth Support your skin, recovery, sleep and longevity with The Forties Formula System. Code TF35 for up to 35% off storewide. https://www.foryouth.co/go/the-forties-formula-system Love Indus Code TFF for 21% off. https://loveindus.com

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  • August 9 · 11 min

    Turning 40: Why Your Whole Identity Gets Turned Upside Down | The Forties Formula In Focus

    Around age 40 to 42, everyone goes through the Uranus opposition — the point where Uranus sits directly opposite its position in your birth chart, roughly halfway through its 84-year orbit. Yi Mei Lai from Alchemei Healing joins The Forties Formula to explain why this transit tends to trigger a reckoning between who you've been and who you're becoming, and why it often lines up with the physiological changes already underway in your 40s. May breaks down what feminine energy actually means (it isn't about gender or appearance, but a yin/yang balance of receptive versus active energy), why so many women over-rely on masculine "proving" energy — disconnection from the body, low creativity, inability to rest — and why the cost of that imbalance shows up as burnout. She also covers why boundaries are essential to reclaiming feminine energy, and why intuition, not more information, is what actually guides women through this transition. In this episode: What the Uranus opposition is and why it occurs at age 40 to 42 Why this transit coincides with midlife identity and purpose questions The difference between feminine and masculine energy, and why it isn't about gender Signs a woman is overly in her masculine energy: disconnection from the body, low creativity, inability to rest Why boundaries are essential to feminine energy and how to start setting them Why intuition, not more information, is the way through How stillness and reconnecting with the body reveal what the mind cannot The Forties Formula is a weekly podcast on perimenopause, menopause, hormones, and health for women in their 40s — covering weight loss, sleep, low libido, ADHD, burnout, longevity and the body changes no one explains. Hosted by Jasmin Dhillon, health strategist at Eat with Jasmin, and Amanda Lim, metabolic health coach and director at LIFT Clinic. Join our community of women and get our weekly newsletter, Forty Tude — receive a free wellness guide as a thank you: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Keywords: Uranus opposition, astrology, midlife, women in their 40s, feminine energy, masculine energy, boundaries, intuition, self-discovery, identity, purpose Chapters: 00:00 The astrology behind turning 40 — the Uranus opposition 02:30 Why women turn inward at this age 04:30 Intuition vs. overthinking 06:30 What "feminine energy" actually means 08:30 The cost of living in masculine energy 10:00 Boundaries and the river analogy

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  • #123
    August 5 · 56 min

    Podiatrist Reveals Why Menopause Is Wrecking Your Feet | The Forties Formula

    In this episode of The Forties Formula, Jasmin Dhillon and Amanda Lim are joined by podiatrist Paul Macaulay to explore one of the most overlooked aspects of women's health: foot health in midlife. From pregnancy and perimenopause to years of wearing the wrong shoes, our feet go through enormous changes that can affect everything from plantar fasciitis and bunions to knee pain, hip pain, back pain, balance, and long-term mobility. Paul explains why most women are wearing the wrong shoe size, how hormones change our tendons and ligaments, why "comfortable" shoes aren't always the healthiest choice, and the simple changes that can dramatically improve foot health for decades to come. Chapters: 00:00 | Why Women Ignore Foot Pain for Too Long 00:57 | Why Your Feet Affect Your Whole Body 03:12 | Why Women Keep Buying the Wrong Shoes 05:26 | The Biggest Mistake People Make When Buying Running Shoes 06:40 | Finding the Right Shoe for Your Foot Type 08:21 | The Shoe Sizing Mistake Most Women Make 10:29 | How Pregnancy Permanently Changes Your Feet 12:27 | Why You May Need Different Shoes After Pregnancy 14:45 | Have Fashion Choices Damaged Our Feet? 16:18 | The Smarter Way to Wear Heels 18:00 | How Perimenopause Changes Your Feet 20:40 | The Most Common Foot Problems After 40 22:03 | How Many Pairs of Shoes Do You Actually Need? 24:26 | Barefoot Shoes: Helpful or Harmful? 26:43 | The Best Exercises for Stronger Feet 31:17 | Why Strong Calves Matter More Than You Think 31:45 | Can Your Feet Cause Knee, Hip & Back Pain? 33:51 | Do Orthotics Really Work? 36:16 | Are There Any Stylish Heels That Are Actually Good? 39:03 | The Shoe Brand Paul Macaulay Recommends 42:42 | Do Reflexology & Foot Soaks Actually Help? 45:13 | The Best Foot Care Routine for Healthy Feet 48:41 | Do Toe Spacers Actually Work? 50:16 | The Best Strength Exercises to Prevent Foot Pain 54:04 | Paul's Forties Formula About our guest Paul Macaulay is a podiatrist specialising in foot pain, biomechanics, running injuries and lower-limb rehabilitation. Through his clinic and educational content, he helps people understand how better footwear, stronger feet, and smarter movement can improve long-term mobility, performance and quality of life. About your hosts Jasmin Dhillon is an Integrated Health Strategist and Health Coach helping women in their 40s navigate gut health, hormones and nutrition. https://www.instagram.com/eat.with.jasmin/ Amanda Lim is a Metabolic Health Coach focused on helping women build strength, confidence and long-term health. https://www.instagram.com/coachamanda/ Support the podcast If you enjoy these conversations, subscribe and share this episode with someone dealing with foot pain, bunions, plantar fasciitis, or anyone who wants to stay active and mobile through midlife. You can also support the show by Buying Us a Coffee: https://buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula The Forties Formula is a weekly podcast on perimenopause, menopause, hormones, and health for women in their 40s — covering weight loss, sleep, low libido, ADHD, burnout, longevity and the body changes no one explains. Join our community of women and get our weekly newsletter, Forty Tude — receive a free wellness guide as a thank you: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/

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  • August 2 · 9 min

    Matrescence Explained: Why Motherhood Changes You More Than You Expected

    This episode is for every woman who has felt like motherhood changed her more than she expected, and for anyone trying to understand why so many mothers struggle silently behind the scenes. The problem isn't that women are failing at motherhood — the expectations were impossible to begin with. Author and workplace consultant Sara Pantry joins The Forties Formula to unpack matrescence — the profound psychological and neurological transition into motherhood, similar in scale to adolescence but almost never named or prepared for. Sara shares the brain science behind it (grey matter changes so measurable that AI can identify a mother's brain scan with full accuracy), her own experience of birth trauma, breastfeeding struggles and postpartum anxiety, and the concept of the "invisible postpartum" — the parts of recovery, identity loss and hormonal upheaval that go unacknowledged, especially after pregnancy loss. Sara also introduces "second best parenting," a framework for making evidence-based decisions without chasing an impossible ideal, and talks through her work with Return, a peer-to-peer mentoring programme supporting mothers returning to work after leave. We talk about: Why motherhood can feel emotionally overwhelming even when you "wanted this" What matrescence actually means, and why more women are finally talking about it The invisible identity shift that happens after having children Why so many women feel isolated after birth The pressure to "bounce back," and why it's harming mothers The invisible postpartum: what it is and why pregnancy loss deserves the same recognition How workplaces are failing mothers returning from maternity leave, and what needs to change About the guest Sara Pantry is an author and workplace consultant specialising in matrescence and the transition into motherhood. She is the founder of Return, a peer-to-peer mentoring programme for mothers returning to work, and runs "From Me to We," a monthly lean-in circle for working mothers in Singapore. About The Forties Formula The Forties Formula is a weekly podcast on perimenopause, menopause, hormones, and health for women in their 40s — covering weight loss, sleep, low libido, ADHD, burnout, longevity and the body changes no one explains. Hosted by Jasmin Dhillon, health strategist at Eat with Jasmin, and Amanda Lim, metabolic health coach and director at LIFT Clinic. Connect and support the show Join our community of women and get our weekly newsletter, Forty Tude — receive a free wellness guide as a thank you: https://the-forties-formula-with-amanda-jasmin.kit.com/ Support the show for $5 a month and get access to ad-free bonus episodes where we answer your questions: buymeacoffee.com/thefortiesformula Got a question on weight, energy, hormones or not feeling like yourself? Send it to us on Instagram @thefortiesformula and we'll answer it on the show.

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