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The Direction Podcast

Duncan Gill, MD

The Direction Podcast explores parenting, child psychiatry, resilience, school culture, and the emotional lives of children, adolescents, families, and communities. Hosted by child psychiatrist Duncan Gill, MD, the podcast blends clinical insight with thoughtful conversations about family challenges in modern life.

Originally launched as Is There a Med for That?, the podcast has gradually evolved from conversations focused primarily on behavioral health treatment into broader discussions about parenting, culture, resilience, and the systems surrounding mental health. Warm, reflective, practical, and often funny, The Direction Podcast is for parents, educators, clinicians, and anyone interested in raising resilient kids in a complicated world.

For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.

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21 episodes
weekly
Avg 21 min
English

Episodes 21

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#21
Wednesday · 12 min
Should I Wake My Kid Up In the Mornings?
Getting your child out of bed can become one of those small daily battles that somehow takes over the whole morning. Duncan and Val discuss when waking up should become a child’s responsibility, why allowing smaller failures now can prevent bigger ones later, and how parents can support kids without taking over. They also tackle the harder situations—when a child’s struggle affects siblings, school, or the rest of the family.
#20
September 23 · 8 min
Leadership Principles: Train Track Moments
Most good parenting involves knowing when to step back—but sometimes parents need to take charge. Duncan explains the idea of a “train track moment”: a situation where safety is at stake and there isn’t time to negotiate, deliberate, or worry about making your child unhappy. He discusses how to distinguish healthy noninterference from necessary intervention, and why decisive action during a genuine crisis is part of being a good leader.
#19
September 16 · 24 min
Autism Part 2: How Is It Diagnosed and Why Is It Increasing?
Duncan talks with occupational therapist Val about how autism is recognized and diagnosed, what experienced clinicians notice that formal testing may miss, and why some children—particularly girls—can be difficult to identify. They also explore conditions that can look like autism, why diagnoses have risen so dramatically, and where the evidence ends and clinical experience and opinion begin.
#18
September 9 · 10 min
Leadership Principles: Encourage Kids to Take Responsibility
Part of growing up is learning to take responsibility—for everyday tasks, decisions, mistakes, and ultimately your own life. Duncan discusses why parents often transfer responsibility too slowly, why diagnoses and developmental challenges should be treated as factors rather than automatic excuses, and why children need opportunities to try, fail, and try again. The goal isn’t responsibility for its own sake: with greater responsibility comes greater freedom, confidence, and independence.
#17
September 2 · 33 min
Leadership Principles: Reward and Punishment
Rewards and punishments can change a child’s behavior—but does that change last? Duncan talks with Direction therapist Erin about why carrots and sticks often work in the short term but fail to build lasting change. They discuss natural consequences, the difference between control and authority, and why a strong parent-child relationship may be the most durable influence a parent has.
#16
August 26 · 43 min
What Is Autism? A Conversation with Valerie Boles
Autism is diagnosed more often than ever, but there is still enormous confusion about what it actually is—and what it isn’t. In the first of a series on autism, I sit down with Direction occupational therapist Valerie Bowles to work through the question from the ground up. Using the DSM criteria as a loose framework, we discuss social communication, masking, eye contact, relationships, repetitive behaviors, rigidity, intense interests, and sensory differences. We also tackle common misconceptions, including the idea that autistic people lack empathy or don’t want meaningful relationships. This is the first in a broader series exploring autism, including diagnosis, treatment, and some of the controversies surrounding how we understand and approach it.
#15
August 19 · 39 min
What Kids Really Need From Their Parents: A Conversation with My Dad
Many of the parenting ideas I’ve shared over the years didn’t begin with me. They came from countless conversations with my father, psychiatrist Dr. David Gill, who in turn learned many of them from his own father. In this first conversation together, we discuss what decades of psychiatry and parenting have taught him about raising independent children, why “If you can’t say no, you can’t say yes,” and the simple philosophy that has shaped both of our approaches: provide maximum support, minimum interference. Along the way, he shares the remarkable story behind the title of his book, If I Cry or Need You, and one of the most profound lessons about parenting that I've ever heard.
#14
August 12 · 15 min
Leadership Principles: Maximum Support, Minimum Interference
One of the hardest parts of parenting is knowing when to step in—and when to step back. In this episode, I introduce two principles that help children become capable, independent adults: maximum support, minimum interference and allow your child to fail. Using the simple example of learning to ride a bike, we explore why children grow through experimentation, why natural consequences are often the best teacher, and how too much interference can unintentionally stunt confidence and independence. Our role isn’t to remove every obstacle from our children’s path. It’s to support them as they learn to overcome those obstacles themselves. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#13
August 5 · 25 min
What Can Parents Learn From the Animal Kingdom?
What do elephants, wolves, bears, chimpanzees, and even house cats have in common with healthy human parenting? In this episode, therapist Erin examines the surprising ways animals prepare their young for independence—and how those same principles can help us become better parents. From secure attachment and emotional regulation to play, boundaries, and gradually increasing responsibility, nature offers some remarkable lessons about raising capable, confident children. The species may differ, but the goal is often the same: helping the next generation learn to thrive without us. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#11
July 29 · 22 min
Leadership Principles: Give Up Control to Gain Authority
A common parental complaint is, “I’ve lost control of my child.” But what if control was never the goal? In this episode, I explore the difference between controlling a child’s behavior and earning the kind of authority that creates lasting influence. I talk about how power naturally fades as children grow, why control battles are counterproductive, and how the parents who have the greatest impact over time are those who earn their children’s respect rather than demand their obedience. Through the lens of the Direction Leadership Principles, this episode offers a different way to think about discipline, influence, and what it means to lead your family well. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#12
July 22 · 17 min
Would I Prescribe Medication for My Own Child?
“Doctor, if this were your child, would you prescribe medication?” In this episode, I talk about my approach to one of the most important decisions families face. Rather than viewing medication as inherently good or bad, I explain why every treatment decision comes down to weighing risks, benefits, and how much a child’s symptoms are interfering with their ability to function and thrive. I discuss the role of therapy, parenting, lifestyle changes, and medication, why psychiatric medications can be both life-changing and life-saving when used appropriately, and why they should never distract from the larger goal of helping children grow into healthy, capable, independent adults. Whether you’re considering medication for your child or simply want to better understand how an experienced child psychiatrist thinks through these decisions, this episode offers a thoughtful framework for approaching one of parenting’s most challenging questions. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#10
July 15 · 34 min
The Problem with Internet Parenting Advice
Parents have never had more access to parenting advice—but has it actually made parenting easier? In this episode, I talk with Val Boles and take a closer look at some of today’s most common parenting recommendations, from reading to your child every day and avoiding the word “no” to praising effort instead of intelligence and teaching executive functioning. We explore how research is often oversimplified, why “studies show…” doesn’t always tell the whole story, and how well-intentioned advice can sometimes leave parents feeling anxious and overwhelmed. Rather than chasing every new parenting trend, we discuss a more grounded approach: focusing on relationships, modeling the behaviors you hope to see in your children, and remembering that good parenting is rarely about following rigid rules. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#9
July 8 · 14 min
Leadership Principles: Practice What You Preach
Parents spend a great deal of time telling their children how they hope they’ll behave. But children are often paying far more attention to what we do than to what we say. In this episode, I talk about the leadership principles of Lead by Example, Not Decree, and Be a Positive Role Model. I discuss why children learn most effectively through observation, how everyday habits shape a child’s development, and why becoming the kind of person you hope your child will become may be one of the most powerful parenting tools available. Whether it’s apologizing, handling failure, exercising, treating others with respect, or simply living your values, children are always watching—and they’re learning far more than we often realize. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#8
July 1 · 12 min
Leadership Principles: Show Up
If I had to choose the single most important principle of good parenting, it would be this: show up. In this episode, I explore why a parent’s presence is one of the most powerful influences in a child’s life. Drawing on clinical experience and examples from families facing difficult challenges, I discuss attachment, role models, co-parenting, and the importance of remaining available even when children struggle. The conversation also examines the difference between setting boundaries and giving up, and why loving a child sometimes means staying connected while allowing them to experience the consequences of their choices. Before advice, consequences, or parenting techniques, children need something more fundamental: adults who are there when it matters most. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#7
June 24 · 9 min
Introduction to Direction's Leadership Principles
In this episode, I introduce the Direction Leadership Principles, a framework I have used in my work to guide parenting, therapy, leadership, and personal growth. Drawing on ideas developed over years of working with children, adolescents, families, and treatment teams, I outline the core principles that underlie the Direction approach. The discussion explores how to approach to the fundamental goal of parenting: promoting independence. This episode serves as an introduction to a series of future conversations exploring each principle in greater depth. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
#6
June 17 · 32 min
Meet Erin: Why Parents Should "Stop Doing That"
In this episode, I am joined by Erin White, therapist, former educator, and parenting group leader at Direction Behavioral Health. Together we explore a surprisingly simple message for many parents: sometimes the best thing you can do is stop doing so much. Erin discusses how well-intentioned adults often over-help, over-direct, and over-protect children in ways that unintentionally undermine confidence, resilience, and independence. Drawing on years of experience working with adolescents and families, she explains why growth often requires discomfort, why children need opportunities to struggle, and how parents can learn when to step back. The conversation explores the balance between support and interference, and why one of the most powerful parenting interventions may simply be knowing when to stop doing that.
#5
June 10 · 30 min
Meet Val: Why Kids Should Play With Sticks
In this episode, I am joined by Valerie Bowles, OTR/L, Clinical Director at Direction Behavioral Health Associates. Val discusses occupational therapy, how childhood has changed in the age of smartphones and constant supervision, and why she believes modern children need more opportunities for risk, independence, and unstructured play. The conversation explores everything from climbing trees and playing with sticks to anxiety, attention, physical development, and the unintended consequences of overprotective parenting. Along the way, Val makes the case that some of the most important lessons children learn come from figuring things out for themselves. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
S1 · E1
June 2 · 7 min
About This Podcast
In this introductory episode, Duncan Gill discusses the goals of The Direction Podcast and the experiences that shaped it. Drawing on more than two decades of work with children, adolescents, families, schools, and psychiatric systems, he outlines the themes that will be explored throughout the series. Topics include parenting, adolescence, child psychiatry, diagnosis, medication, schools, social media, culture, and the challenges facing modern families. Above all, the podcast aims to explore what helps children become healthy, capable, and independent adults, while maintaining perspective, common sense, and a sense of humor along the way. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
S1 · E2
June 2 · 13 min
The Goal of Parenting
What is the actual goal of parenting? Most parents spend enormous amounts of time worrying about grades, behavior, happiness, friendships, anxiety, and countless day-to-day decisions. Yet many never stop to ask a more fundamental question: what are we ultimately trying to accomplish? In this episode, I explore the idea that the central task of parenting is helping children become independent, capable adults. I talk about individuation, the balance between support and challenge, and why both over-involvement and under-involvement can interfere with healthy development. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.
S1 · E3
June 2 · 16 min
Feeling Better vs. Functioning Better
Many parents assume that if their child is anxious, sad, frustrated, or overwhelmed, the goal is to help them feel better. While understandable, that approach can sometimes get in the way of growth. In this episode, I explore the difference between feeling better and functioning better. I discuss why discomfort is often a normal part of development, how avoidance can reinforce problems, and why helping children continue to engage with life may be one of the most important things parents can do. For related articles and resources, please visit www.directionbehavioralhealth.com.

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