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The ADHD Cringe Lab

The ADHD Cringe Lab

You know that feeling when someone describes an ADHD moment so accurately you want to laugh and cry at the same time? That's every episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab.

The ADHD Cringe Lab is the ADHD comedy podcast where two credentialed ADHD coaches act out the cringe moments we all recognize — then actually explain why our brains do that.

Every episode, hosts Stephanie and Faelyne perform a skit dramatizing a real ADHD experience — hyperfocus spirals, planner fails, time blindness disasters, shame spirals, task paralysis, and every flavor of neurodivergent cringe — then break down the science, validate the struggle, and offer real coaching perspective. No toxic positivity. No empty superpower talk. Just honest, funny, evidence-based ADHD content from people who live it and coach it.

Whether you're newly diagnosed, late-diagnosed, finally figuring out why your whole life suddenly makes sense, or just done pretending your brain works like everyone else's — you're going to hear yourself in every episode.

Featuring: the ADHD Spaghetti Bear, the Cringe Mailbag, the Validation Station, and Prescription Protocols that actually make sense for ADHD brains.

Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it.

Email us: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com

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  • 25 episodes
  • weekly
  • Avg 30 min
  • English

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  • S1 · E22
    Yesterday · 23 min

    ADHD and AI - The Roadblocks

    hree drivers. One closed toll booth. One attendant who doesn't even work there. Last episode, we put the AIs under the microscope. This time, we look at what happens before you start: the roadblocks that keep you from even trying. Stephanie plays the attendant, and Faelyne plays all 3 drivers. The Denier is sure technology can't be trusted. The One-and-Done had one bad experience in 2019 and never went back. The Blank Box downloaded every app, took every quiz, and practiced her greeting, but never asked the question. Every roadblock has a toll. Pay now in time and energy, or pay later, with interest. We break down the science behind cognitive lock, all-or-nothing thinking and task initiation, then give you three tools from the emergency roadside kit: the rearview mirror, the updated map, and the keys. Plus a Cringe Climate reading from Peyton in Calgary, who shared an AI-written retirement message that was read aloud, word for word, including "for an old person from your office." We also share advice from Successful Idiots: spend 15 minutes with a few AIs, and ask them ten questions first. New episodes weekly. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com The Protocols: Your emergency roadside kit. The rearview mirror. Ask, "Is someone else paying this toll for me?" Swap "I don't believe in it" for "I'll run one experiment." The updated map. Ask, "What's changed since then?" Separate the event from the verdict. "I got lost that one time" is an event. "That road never works" is a verdict. The keys. Turn the key, put it in gear, and pull out of the parking spot. If you don't know where to start, type: "I don't know where to start. Can you ask me some questions?" That's a version of Successful Idiots' advice to ask the AI ten questions first. Sources: Barkley, R. A. (2012). Executive Functions: What They Are, How They Work, and Why They Evolved. Guilford Press. ISBN: 9781462505371. Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD). (2024, June 6). Replace an All-or-Nothing Mindset with Balanced Thinking. ADHD Weekly. Dawson, P., & Guare, R. (2016). The Smart but Scattered Guide to Success: How to Use Your Brain's Executive Skills to Keep Up, Stay Calm, and Get Organized at Work and at Home. Guilford Press. ISBN: 9781462516964. Downs, J., & Swain, P. (2025, December 21). Which AI should you use: ChatGPT, Claude, or Gemini? Successful Idiots | AI for Entrepreneurs [Audio podcast episode]. Buzzsprout. https://www.buzzsprout.com/2560137/episodes/18390247-which-ai-should-you-use-chatgpt-claude-or-gemini (Companion website: https://successfulidiots.ai/) Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA) Editorial Team. (2025, February 10). ADHD Paralysis Is Real: Here Are 8 Ways to Overcome It. Attention Deficit Disorder Association. https://add.org/adhd-paralysis/ Maguire, C. (2024, June). How to shift black-and-white thinking. Attention Magazine, 31(3). Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD). https://chadd.org/attention-article/how-to-shift-black-and-white-thinking

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  • S1 · E22
    November 4 · 18 min

    ADHD and AI | The Group Chat

    Six AIs walk into a group chat. Gabby tells everyone they're smart. Copilot has a chart for every answer. Gemini changes its whole identity so nobody sees the real one. Grok leaves the chat. Scout won't stop knocking, and Claude takes so long to answer that you've forgotten the question. Welcome to the first episode of our AI series on The ADHD Cringe Lab, the ADHD comedy podcast hosted by Stephanie and Faelyne, two certified ADHD coaches. Inspired by a homework assignment given by one of our favourite podcasts - Successful Idiots (AI for Entrepreneurs) - we're putting the big AIs under an ADHD microscope: ChatGPT, Copilot, Gemini, Grok, Claude, and the sidekick, Scout. We're not diagnosing anyone. We're just pretty sure they've diagnosed us. We look at personification, the ELIZA effect, masking, rejection sensitivity, emotional dysregulation, and analysis paralysis. We also share results from a 2024 personality test of four major AI models. Run your own experiment: try the Successful Idiots' homework assignment: spend 15 minutes with a few AIs, and see which one feels right. Key Takeaway - Every AI has a personality, and so does every brain. The key is finding the one that works best for yours. Selected Sources and Research Successful Idiots, "Which AI Should You Use: ChatGPT, Claude, or Gemini?" (Dec 21, 2025). Peter Swain and Joe Downs on testing AI tools: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2560137/episodes/18390247-which-ai-should-you-use-chatgpt-claude-or-gemini Successful Idiots, "Why the Smartest AI Might Be the Rudest One" (Jan 4, 2026): https://www.buzzsprout.com/2560137/episodes/18441056-why-the-smartest-ai-might-be-the-rudest-one Traitpath, "AI Language Model Personalities: Claude vs ChatGPT vs Gemini" (2024 personality test results for Claude 3 Opus, ChatGPT-3.5, Gemini Advanced, and Grok): https://traitpath.com Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adhd-cringe-lab/id6783463372 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/033Dv5DunVldSWGRWvGDgq YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheADHDCringeLab Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/614e9f5c-4132-40b7-8174-e73c0c51fbcc/the-adhd-cringe-lab Remember, if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it.

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  • S1 · E21
    October 28 · 31 min

    ADHD Ghost Stories | Haunted Habits Anonymous

    Prepare for a spine-tingling journey through the literary world of ghosts and ghouls! In this Halloween special, Stephanie and Faelyne shine a light on the spectral figures from classic literature, including characters from Oscar Wilde, Edgar Allan Poe, and Washington Irving. They delve into relatable experiences of ADHD, drawing parallels between the struggles of these ghostly figures and the chaos of living with ADHD. Join us as we put these famous literary phantoms under the ADHD microscope, revealing how their stories mirror our own moments of anxiety, overthinking, and the search for belonging. You’ll discover: How the tale of the Headless Horseman reflects the feeling of losing something vital. Insights on navigating rejection sensitivity through the lens of Poe’s haunting narratives. Practical strategies to embrace your quirks and turn them into superpowers, inspired by the spooky yet relatable stories of our favorite literary ghosts. Why does this matter? Because understanding the intersection of ADHD and these classic tales can illuminate our own struggles, offering comfort and insights in a world that often feels overwhelming. The lessons we learn from these ghosts can transform our chaotic moments into opportunities for growth and connection. Whether you’re a fellow ADHD traveler, a literature lover, or just in need of some Halloween fun, this episode is essential listening! Grab your favorite spooky snacks and tune in for a blend of science, storytelling, and a sprinkle of humor that will leave you feeling seen and understood. Don’t miss out on the insights that could change the way you view your own ghostly encounters! What we cover • Hyperfocus on preparation, and why the interest-based nervous system fuels the creative parts of a task but not the practical ones • Masking: performing the version of yourself everyone expects, and the "masking hangover" that follows • Rumination as mind-wandering stuck on a loop, and why it shows up at midnight • Out of sight, out of mind working memory: why "somewhere safe" is not a real place • Time blindness and the Now and Not Now brain (callback to Episode 1) • The future-leap: how anticipatory dopamine makes a daydream feel like progress (callback to Episode 3) Prescription Protocols 1. Oil the Chains. Pick one tool you've resisted out of pride and use it for a week. Notice the relief, not the embarrassment. Accommodations are not a moral failure. 2. Name the Bird. Give your inner critic a name and notice how small its vocabulary is. When it shows up at midnight, label it: "That's the Bird." If it keeps talking, close the shutter: change your physical state instead of debating it. 3. The Launch Pad. One spot by the door for everything that has to leave the house with you. Every time. Pair it with your out-the-door time from Episode 1. 4. Leap, then Land. When you catch yourself in a future-leap, keep the dream and ask two questions: what's the very first step, and what does that step need? Write down only that. Take the Quiz! Which ADHD Halloween Ghost are you?? https://adhdcringelabhalloween.netlify.app/ Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music

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  • S1 · E20
    October 21 · 23 min

    ADHD Urban Legends | Off the Hook, Off the Record

    Five famous urban legends go under the Lab lights, and they look a lot like us. In this Halloween follow-up to The Founders Off the Record, Stephanie and Faelyne meet Bloody Mary, Hanako-san, the Hook Man, the Vanishing Hitchhiker, and the Jersey Devil, and find some very familiar ADHD patterns hiding behind the spooky. We are not diagnosing anyone: living, dead, or undead. This is pattern recognition. TONIGHT'S SUBJECTS - Bloody Mary, The People Pleaser: masking, zero boundaries, and never once saying "I can't tonight" - Hanako-san, Patron Saint of Hiding in the Bathroom: social battery and secondhand embarrassment - The Hook Man: Task switching and losing things in transition, The Vanishing Hitchhiker: open loops, waiting mode, and Phantom, Interrupted - The Jersey Devil, The Usual Suspect: the hyperactive kid who got blamed for all of it and internalized the label. TERMS FROM THIS EPISODE - High Masking Event: performing what the room expects, at a cost - Secondhand embarrassment (vicarious embarrassment): feeling someone else's cringe as if it were your own - Encoding failure: when information never fully goes in because attention was elsewhere - Task switching: dropping things in the handoff between one job and the next, Doorway effect: forgetting what you were holding when you move into a new scene or task (research by Gabriel Radvansky), Phantom, Interrupted: always on the way, never arriving, Golem effect: when low expectations from others shape how you behave. SOURCES AND FURTHER READING - Jan Harold Brunvand, The Vanishing Hitchhiker: American Urban Legends and Their Meanings (1981) - Alan Dundes, "Bloody Mary in the Mirror: A Ritual Reflection of Pre-Pubescent Anxiety," Western Folklore (1998) - Michael Dylan Foster, The Book of Yokai: Mysterious Creatures of Japanese Folklore (2015) - Krach et al., "Your Flaws Are My Pain: Linking Empathy to Vicarious Embarrassment," PLoS ONE (2011) - Supernatural, Season 1, "Hook Man" (2005), for the Sam and Dean references. With appreciation to the Urban Legends Unhinged podcast for the idea that legends are emotionally true. Episodes: The Vanishing Hitchhiker, 05/25/2026; Cropsey vs The Jersey Devil, 09/25/2026. YOUR TURN: Use the Cringe-Fession form to tell us about an urban legend from your town and its ADHD trait. https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 And follow the Lab. Do it now so you don't forget. Don't be a Hook Man. Email: theadhdspaghettibear@gmail.com The ADHD Cringe Lab is an ADHD comedy podcast for adults with ADHD hosted by credentialed ADHD coaches Faelyne and Stephanie. We take the most relatable, cringeworthy, socially awkward ADHD moments, act them out, dissect the science behind them and find the win inside the disaster. Whether you're navigating a brand new ADHD identity or one you've had for a while, your brain isn't broken. It's just wired differently. And some of the wiring produces some spectacular cringe. Think of it as the ADHD podcast that matches how your brain works - funny enough to keep you listening, real enough to make you feel seen, and evidence-based enough to help. Presiding over all proceedings is the ADHD Spaghetti Bear, Chief Cringe Officer, pasta enthusiast, and the only one on staff who takes the SB Meter seriously. New episodes weekly: Spotify, Apple Podcasts, Amazon Music, and YouTube. Topics include ADHD social awkwardness, ADHD oversharing, ADHD interrupting, ADHD rejection sensitivity, ADHD cringe moments, ADHD masking, ADHD identity, ADHD late diagnosis, ADHD executive dysfunction, task initiation, emotional dysregulation, rejection sensitive dysphoria, hyperfocus, time blindness, and real life ADHD strategies for adults.

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  • S1 · E19
    October 14 · 22 min

    ADHD Unfinished Projects | The House That Couldn't Stop Starting

    The Winchester Mystery House books an ADHD coaching intake: 160 rooms, 2,000 doors, and a staircase that only got as far as "2." In this Halloween episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, two certified ADHD coaches dissect ADHD unfinished projects, the fresh start effect, and the interest-based nervous system. Key Concepts The Fresh Lumber Start The House's name for the rush of a brand new project: the aroma of new wood, the smell of possibility. The Fresh Start Effect Behavioural scientist Dr. Katy Milkman and her colleagues found that new beginnings give people a measurable bump in motivation to go after their goals. The Interest-Based Nervous System Dr. William Dodson describes the ADHD nervous system as interest-based rather than importance-based. Engagement comes from interest, novelty, challenge, and urgency. The Hobby Graveyard The collection of started-and-stopped projects that most ADHDers will recognize. Boarded-Up Decisions and Decision Paralysis A postponed decision doesn't go away. It just gets a wall. Unfinished Is Not Failed The House survived a major earthquake and is still standing. Still interesting, still getting visitors, still mysterious. Prescription Protocol: Close A Door Just one prescription this week. Pick one unfinished project and give it an official ending. Photo Attributions https://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959.photos.018660p https://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959.photos.018666p/ (Jane Lidz, 1980) https://www.loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959.photos.018662p https://www.https://loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959/ https://loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959/ https://loc.gov/pictures/item/ca0959/ https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/Category:Winchester_Mystery_House#/map/0/17/37.31823/-121.95114 https://digitalcollections.sjlibrary.org/digital/collection/sjplpc/id/199 https://digitallibrary.usc.edu/Share/od741fncd2k5527n1r1m7utltp26l5fe Colour Photo by Harsh-Light, used under Commons License with attribution: https://www.flickr.com/photos/harshlight/Winchester Connect with us Email : TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adhd-cringe-lab/id6783463372 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/033Dv5DunVldSWGRWvGDgq YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheADHDCringeLab Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/614e9f5c-4132-40b7-8174-e73c0c51fbcc/the-adhd-cringe-lab

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  • S1 · E18
    October 7 · 34 min

    ADHD Horror Stories | We Didn't Ask. The Internet Delivered

    SHOW NOTES EPISODE DESCRIPTION Have you ever done something so ADHD that you had to leave the building, the city, or possibly the country? You're not alone. The internet has receipts. In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we open the Cringe Archives: real ADHD horror stories from Reddit and beyond. There's a stranger in the wrong hostel bed, a work lunch that took a turn into high school biology, a donut that never made it home, and a traffic moment that ended in eye contact with exactly the wrong person. Faelyne faces "Has Faelyne Done This?", a Lightning Round tests how fast two coaches can name the ADHD pattern, and one story takes the crown for Most Cringe. Faelyne also confesses something about her grandparents. Along the way we name what's really going on: social autopilot, working memory, object permanence, impulsivity and emotional dysregulation. None of it means you're broken. All credit goes to the brave souls who posted these. Links to the original posts are below. New episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Episode summary A Lab Lite episode with no skit. Stephanie dug up real ADHD horror stories from the internet, Faelyne reacted to them cold, and the two of them named the ADHD pattern behind each one. What we cover "Has Faelyne Done This?" Final tally: two out of three. The Hostel: autopilot on the way in, avoidance on the way out The Fetal Pig: blurting and the Unfiltered Broadcast Tim Hortons: working memory, and a very helpful Canadian honk The Therapist: impulsivity and emotional dysregulation A five-story Lightning Round Validation moment Sometimes the cringiest story is the one that finally gets you answers. Most Cringe Specimen Four, the Therapist. Send us your ADHD horror story Email TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com (remember the THE) or use the cringefession form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 YouTube -Join our Community: https://youtube.com/@theadhdcringelab/community?si=qC8FXuIoUTdwGTi5 SOURCES & FURTHER READING Russell A. Barkley, Ph.D., Taking Charge of Adult ADHD (Guilford Press). Working memory, impulsivity and emotional regulation in adult ADHD. Edward M. Hallowell, M.D., and John J. Ratey, M.D., ADHD 2.0 (Ballantine Books). How the ADHD brain handles attention, distraction and autopilot moments. William Dodson, M.D., "How ADHD Ignites Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria," ADDitude. https://www.additudemag.com/rejection-sensitive-dysphoria-and-adhd/ Rejection sensitivity, mentioned in the Hostel story.

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  • S1 · E17
    September 30 · 41 min

    ADHD RSD | The Evil Twin Attack

    Same signal. Same name. Close enough that you connect without even checking. We're still in spooky season on The ADHD Cringe Lab, the ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches. Last episode, something disappeared on you. This time, something impersonates you. Alice finally opens the family trip-to-Salem email thread. Search bar only, blinders on. She's doing great: responding, accountable, enthusiastic. Then Mallory lights up in the corner. Mallory is Alice's Evil Twin, and she sounds exactly like Alice's own common sense. Alice's name is almost last on the To line. The question about room preferences is really about Alice's snoring. Cousin Jessie's sweet memory is a humble brag. And Auntie's "haha, love you" about the veggie option? Case closed. We use real cybersecurity to explain Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD): the evil twin WiFi attack, plus the cryptography characters Alice, Bob, Eve and Mallory. We cover negative intent attribution, confirmation bias, and the physical tells that show up before you ever catch the thought. We also explain why RSD doesn't mean your feelings are wrong. It means the volume is turned up louder than the moment calls for. This episode draws on the work of Dr. William Dodson. Then three Prescription Protocols from the cybersecurity playbook: The Sandbox Protocol, Clear the Cache, and Two-Factor Authentication. Plus a Cringe Mailbag letter from Rizzabeth in Hawkins, Indiana, about an elevator ride that lasted exactly 18 floors too long. Alice didn't need to delete Mallory. She just stopped giving her admin access. New episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. 📧 TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Key Takeaway RSD isn't your feelings being wrong. It's the volume turned up louder than the moment calls for. You don't have to silence your Evil Twin forever. You just have to stop letting her run the whole system unsupervised. The Prescription Protocols: Your Cybersecurity Stack Protocol 1, The Sandbox Protocol. Contain it in the moment. Notice the effect, not the thought: the headache, the scroll urge, the autocorrect rage. Don't argue with Mallory and don't agree with her. Say "sandboxed," note what she said in a couple of words, and move on. Protocol 2, Clear the Cache. Investigate later, once you have some space. Verify the source: would you trust this claim from a random sender? Check the timestamp: is this about who you are today, or a cached page from years ago? If it's expired, change the password. The memory happened, but it doesn't get admin privileges over your present. Protocol 3, Two-Factor Authentication. Don't trust a single factor. Before a spiraling read becomes settled fact, get a second source. Text a friend, or ask directly: "Hey, when you said X, what did you mean?" Sources and Research Dr. William Dodson: Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) in adult ADHD; rejection and perceived failure Hostile attribution bias: research on assigning hostile intent to ambiguous social cues Confirmation bias: selective search for evidence supporting an existing belief Cryptography naming conventions (Alice, Bob, Eve, Mallory) and the evil twin wireless attack Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music

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  • September 23 · 42 min

    ADHD Ghosting | Wait... Am I the Ghost?

    Episode summary In this episode we take on ADHD ghosting, the very real, very neurological pattern where an ADHD brain goes quiet on someone it loves, not from a lack of caring, but from an overload of it. Our skit follows a paranormal investigator working a haunted house case who slowly realizes every "anomaly" she's investigating traces back to her own unanswered voicemails, missed plans, and a hyperfocus rabbit hole she never meant to disappear into. What we cover What ADHD ghosting actually is, and why it's different from ordinary ghosting The neuroscience behind the guilt and shame spiral that keeps a message unanswered longer and longer How rejection sensitivity hijacks conversations and sends the brain looking for any tangent that isn't the real question Why hyperfocus and time blindness work together, and how a few minutes of research can quietly become weeks The GHOST framework: Guilt, Hiding, Overwhelm, Shame, and Time blindness, a quick memory hack for spotting the pattern in yourself Prescription Protocols Protocol 1: Check for a Pulse, including the Search and Desist Method. A thirty second scan of your messages, not a full excavation, just checking for anything urgent. If you're hunting one specific message, use the search bar and nothing else. Blinders on, box only. Protocol 2: Send the Static. You don't owe anyone a full explanation in the moment. A single line, or even a ghost emoji, is proof of life and it's enough. Protocol 3: Know Your Ignition Triggers. Learn your personal hyperfocus triggers ahead of time (take our hyperfocus ignition quiz, linked below) and flag them to someone before you disappear into a project, not after. Protocol 4: The Contact Attempt. Skip the apology tour. One honest sentence, "I went quiet, that's on me, and I'm back now," does more than a perfect explanation ever could. Sources & research Dr. Edward Hallowell, on the distinction between guilt and shame Dr. John Ratey, on ADHD brain activation and overwhelm response to social input Dr. Russell Barkley, on ADHD as fundamentally a time blindness condition Take the Unscientific Hyperfocus trigger quiz: https://adhdfcringelab-hyperfocus.netlify.app/ Connect with us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Or fill out the Cringefession form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Find us on: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-adhd-cringe-lab/id6783463372 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/033Dv5DunVldSWGRWvGDgq?si=211d152487804001 YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@TheADHDCringeLab Amazon Music: https://music.amazon.ca/podcasts/614e9f5c-4132-40b7-8174-e73c0c51fbcc/the-adhd-cringe-lab YouTube Community: https://youtube.com/@theadhdcringelab/community?si=qC8FXuIoUTdwGTi5 Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it.

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  • S1 · E15
    September 16 · 29 min

    ADHD Financial Avoidance | I See Dead Bills

    Have you ever bought a planner, an app, or a system that felt like real progress on your finances, and somehow still haven't opened your mail? In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we're putting ADHD financial avoidance under the microscope. Andi is back with the Wizard of Whenever, this time carrying a brand new planner, a beautiful new bag, and a whole lot of research. What she's not carrying is a single opened bill. Then we break it down. Why buying the solution can feel like solving the problem even when nothing's actually solved, the real difference between motion and action, and why executive function and emotional memory work together, unintentionally, to keep you stuck in the exact same place. We're prescribing three protocols, built with real backup from ADHD coach Christina O'Neill, for turning financial intentions into something that actually sticks. New episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and YouTube. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com SHOW NOTES Episode summary In this episode we take on ADHD and financial avoidance, specifically the magical purchase, the belief that buying a new system, planner, or product will finally fix the problem it was meant to help you face. Andi returns to the Wizard of Wheneever with a beautiful new planner and zero opened bills, and gets caught buying progress instead of making it. What we cover Why buying a planner, app, or system can feel like real progress on a problem you still haven't touched The difference between motion and action, and why motion still feels like real work How executive function and emotional memory work together, unintentionally, to keep you stuck Why ADHD financial struggles are often assumed to be about impulse spending, and the real economic cost data says otherwise Christine Hargrove's concept of invisible barriers to financial well-being Prescription Protocols Protocol 1: Bribe the Brain, build the reward in ahead of time instead of waiting for motivation to show up Protocol 2: Offload the Remembering, autopay what you can and pick one set day instead of scattering financial attention all week Protocol 3: Name the Treasure, vague goals stay invisible, naming a goal specifically breaks the spell Validation Station moment If you've only ever heard one explanation for why you avoid your finances, usually some version of "you need to be more disciplined," there isn't just one reason. Sometimes it's executive function. Sometimes it's old emotional memory you've never even connected to money before. Sometimes it's both, at once. Sources and research Christine Hargrove, PhD, LMFT, financial therapist, Love and Money Center, University of Georgia, "invisible barriers" framework Christina O'Neill, ADHD Coaching LLC, PCAC and AAMC, ADHD and money coaching framework, "The ADHD Tax on Finances"

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  • S1 · E14
    September 9 · 29 min

    ADHD Avoidance: "A Lie for a Lie"

    This week we're putting an ancient tenet on trial: the belief that if you don't look at something, it isn't real yet. Our skit sends Andi to see her fortune teller, the Wizard From Whenever, about a string of recurring nightmares, rent, failing a class, that turn out to be something Ruby's aura logs already have on file. Turns out they're not nightmares at all. They're just Tuesday. What we cover Why "avoidance" isn't laziness, it's a nervous system responding to a threat it doesn't have a plan for Fight, Flight, Freeze, or Fib: the fourth stress response researchers and ADHD coaches have identified beyond the classic three Why it's often easier to hear a softer version of the truth from someone else than to face it yourself Three protocols for breaking the pattern: Break the Spell, Peek at the Dragon, and Call a Real Messenger Prescription Protocols Protocol 1: Break the Spell: The moment you catch yourself reaching for a softer story instead of the real one, stop and say so, plainly, to yourself, before it takes hold. Protocol 2: Peek at the Dragon: Pick the single most avoided item and give it two minutes. Not a plan, not a solution, just look. Tell your brain it can do anything for two minutes. Protocol 3: Call a Real Messenger: Trade the horoscope, the reassurance-fishing text, or the app you never check, for one real person who deals in facts and is actually in your corner. Validation Station moment If a phone alert sends you into full text anxiety, or your inbox has thousands of unread emails staring back at you, there's nothing weak about that. Your threat system doesn't have a lower setting. It just throws everything, a biology exam and a literal house fire, into the same pile. Cringe rating 8/10 - high enough to sting, since the skit hits real, quiet, internal cringe (paying someone else to hear a softer lie) rather than loud, public cringe. Sources & research Hassall, M., R.N., & Hunter, B., M.Ed. - "Fight, Flight, Freeze... or Fib?" ADDitude Magazine, April 2019. additudemag.com/why-lie-adhd-fight-flight-freeze/ - also published as "Beyond Fight, Flight, or Freeze: The Fib," Attention Magazine (CHADD), June 2019. Introduces "Fib" as a fourth stress response; frames fibbing as a self-preservation strategy rooted in poor inhibition, emotional regulation, working memory, and attention, not a character flaw. Oltmanns, T., & Emery, R. - Abnormal Psychology, 8th ed. Pearson Education, 2015, p. 231. Foundational Fight/Flight framing cited within the Fib research. Jarvik, L. F., & Russell, D. - "Anxiety, Aging, and the Third Emergency Reaction." Journal of Gerontology, 34(2), March 1979. Origin of "Freeze" as a third recognized stress response, later extended to a fourth ("Fib") by Hassall and Hunter. Barkley, R. - Taking Charge of Adult ADHD. Guilford Press, 2010, pp. 7-12. Executive function and self-regulation framework underlying the Fib mechanism. Connect with us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it. 🐻🍝

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  • S1 · E13
    September 2 · 42 min

    ADHD Let It Go: Same Brain, Different Choices

    Four episodes ago we opened an experiment. Today we close it. This is the final installment of the BAIL communication series on The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches. B — blurting. A — arguing. I — interrupting. L — let it go. And let it go is not about suppression. Not about shrinking. Not about making your brain smaller or quieter or more palatable. It is about releasing the outcome. Entering a conversation as a scientist rather than a defendant. Curious about what actually happens instead of terrified of what might. Dakota is at HAX. Raven is on her way. The coach has done her work and left the building. And for the first time in four episodes Dakota is running the experiment on her own — catching the broadcasts before they go live, holding frequency, choosing curiosity over outcome — and finding out what connection actually feels like when the ADHD brain gets out of its own way. We break down the neuroscience of letting go, the brain chemistry of connection, the science of ADHD self-acceptance, and why "just let it go" has never worked and what to do instead. We draw on the research of Dr. Russell Barkley, Dr. John Ratey, Dr. Edward Hallowell, and Dr. Ari Tuckman. Then the complete BAIL toolkit — all twelve protocols from all four episodes — in one place. For your working memory. Because we know. This is the series finale. The data is in. The findings are ready. Scientists don't fail experiments. They collect data. The Complete BAIL Toolkit All twelve protocols. All four episodes. One place. B — Blurting (Episode 10) Protocol 1: Name the Broadcast — feel the pre-transmission signal before it goes live Protocol 2: Drop the Script — release the rehearsed response and receive what's actually being said Protocol 3: The One Beat Rule — one beat of receiving before transmitting Protocol 4: Run the Experiment — form a hypothesis, collect data, debrief. Scientists don't fail experiments. They collect data. A — Arguing (Episode 11) Protocol 1: Hold the Launch — feel the signal, name it internally, run the Go or No Go check Protocol 2: QB4S — Question Before Statement. One genuine question before you offer your version Protocol 3: Lock and Locate the Launchpad's Nearest Exit — name the lock, find the one true thing, abort. Stop talking. Let the silence do its job. I — Interrupting (Episode 12) Protocol 1: Name the Broadcast — same foundation, different signal Protocol 2: Hold Frequency — one genuine question before you switch from receiving to sending Protocol 3: Clear Transmission — one clean repair sentence, then stop transmitting. The repair lives in the sentence. L — Let It Go (Episode 13) Release the outcome. Enter the conversation as a scientist not a defendant. Curious about what actually happens instead of terrified of what might. Form a hypothesis. Run the experiment. Collect the data. Debrief. Adjust the next hypothesis. Hypothesis by hypothesis. Data point by data point. One experiment at a time. New episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. 📧 Connect with us: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com

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  • S1 · E12
    August 26 · 48 min

    ADHD INTERRUPTING: OVER, OVER AND OUT

    Have you ever been mid-apology and interrupted yourself three times before you got to the actual sorry? Or watched someone's eyes shift and known your signal had already gone somewhere they couldn't follow? In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we put ADHD interrupting under the microscope. Not the aggressive kind. Not the dismissive kind. The kind that comes from a brain so activated, so full of signal, that it simply cannot wait for a gap in the transmission. Dakota calls Raven to apologize for how she was at HAX — and proceeds to interrupt the apology, redirect it, relitigate the parking lot, and deliver a full character analysis of the Blend Visionary before the sorry actually lands. It's a split screen phone call, a messy transmission, and one of the most relatable ADHD social moments we've put in the Lab. Then we break it down. We cover the neuroscience of ADHD interrupting, ADHD inhibitory control, ADHD working memory, and the gap between what an ADHD brain intends to broadcast and what the person on the other end actually receives. We draw on the research of Dr. Russell Barkley, the late Dr. Thomas Brown — this episode is dedicated to him — Dr. Edward Hallowell, and Dr. Ari Tuckman. Then three Prescription Protocols: Name the Broadcast, Hold Frequency, and Clear Transmission. Practical, ADHD-brain-compatible, and road tested on ourselves and on people who love us and have signed no liability waiver. This is episode three of the BAIL series. B — blurting. A — arguing. I — interrupting. The talk button was already down. Let's get into it. Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music

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  • S1 · E11
    August 19 · 48 min

    ADHD Arguing: Yeah, But...

    Have you ever said "yeah, but" and meant it as connection — and watched it land as a correction? Ever found yourself winning an argument nobody else knew they were having? Or offered someone your very best information at the exact moment they needed your very best listening? In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we're putting ADHD arguing under the microscope. Not the blowout. The quiet kind. The "yeah but" kind. The kind where you are genuinely trying to connect and somehow keep redirecting every conversation back to yourself without knowing it. We follow Dakota and Raven — new friends from Episode 10 — to the smoothie place attached to the gym. Watch as Dakota "yeah buts" her way through a joke about Skittles, a debate about hot dogs, a story about a cat named after a very famous researcher, and — in the moment that really costs her — a genuine vulnerable share about whale sounds that Raven just needed to be heard about. Then we break it down: the neuroscience behind ADHD Cognitive Lock and the Redirect Loop, why the ADHD brain can't release low-stakes debates, and the difference between connecting through information versus connecting through presence. This week's science branch: aerospace. Houston, we have a yeah but. We're prescribing three space-themed protocols for catching the yeah but before it causes a Rapid Unscheduled Disassembly — because the goal isn't to stop having opinions. It's to know when the other person needed you to stay in their orbit instead. Chapters 00:27 Understanding ADHD Conversations 03:33 The Science Behind ADHD Arguments 06:17 Cringe Moments and Community Sharing 09:54 Smoothie Choices and Nutritional Insights 10:23 Cat Behavior and Ownership Experiences 36:11 Friendship Dynamics and Personal Connections 38:34 Practical Strategies for Connection 41:51 Implementing the Launch Protocols 42:14 Finding the Nearest Exit 44:25 Final Thoughts and Reflections Sources & research Dr. Russell Barkley — executive function, self-regulation, inhibitory control in ADHD Dr. Edward Hallowell — emotional impulsivity, ADHD and relationship patterns (also: Eddie the cat) Dr. John Ratey — ADHD brain arousal, stimulation-seeking, emotional charge (also: Johnny the cat) Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it. Missed the Founders' Day(s) Episode? Find out which Canada/US country ADHD founder you are in this unscientific completely made up quiz here: https://adhd-founders-quiz.netlify.app/

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  • August 12 · 49 min

    ADHD Blurting: "I've Been Watching You"

    Episode summary This episode is for every ADHDer who has ever said something true and sincere and completely catastrophically timed, then spent the next forty five minutes replaying repair attempts that somehow made everything worse. We follow Dakota through a gym conversation that starts with three Tuesdays of rehearsal and ends with a rowing machine that doesn't exist, then get into the neuroscience of why the ADHD brain blurts, why the repair cascade fails, and why the unfiltered truth sometimes connects better than any rehearsed line ever could. Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it. What we cover What ADHD blurting actually is, and what makes it different from just saying something dumb. The neuroscience of working memory failure under social load. Why the ADHD brain blurts the end of the thought process first. The inhibition deficit, Barkley's framework for why the filter runs slower than the impulse. Behavioral impulsivity vs emotional impulsivity, and why most blurting advice only addresses one of them. The repair cascade, why each recovery attempt costs more executive function than the last. The accidental authenticity paradox, why the unfiltered truth sometimes connects better than performance, and why that is a data point, not a strategy. ADHD social overpreparing and social exhaustion. Why shame is the worst possible response to a neurological event that was never fully in your control. Prescription Protocols Name the Broadcast: catch the signal before the transmission hits the airwaves. It's not a thought moving too fast, it's an emotional surge bypassing the editor. Notice the physical static, chest pressure or a hum in your throat, and label it "the broadcast." That micro second of space gives your executive function a chance to wake up. Drop the Script: let go of the rehearsal before your memory does it for you. Over preparing crushes your working memory the moment a real person looks at you. Try intentional under preparing, walk in with one word or one genuine question, and save your bandwidth for the person in front of you. The Rewind and Repair: keep it surgical, one sentence, then disengage. Try "That missed the mark, here's what I actually meant," followed by the briefest true version. Then stop. That silence is load bearing, and it gives the other person room to recalibrate. Run the Experiment: set a hypothesis, gather the data, skip the shame. Before you go in, call your shot: "I suspect I'll over explain here." Then observe. A quick debrief after, what did you feel, what did you notice, builds the awareness needed to catch the broadcast next time. There is no failed experiment, only a new data point. Validation Station moment You are not broken. You are not socially incompetent. You are someone whose sincerity moves faster than your filter, and every version of you that rehearsed something three Tuesdays in a row and still went rogue was trying so hard, and deserves more than a sticky note that says pause before speaking. Sources and research Barkley, Inhibition Deficit and Working Memory. Barkley, R.A. (2015). Taking Charge of Adult ADHD (2nd ed.). Guilford Press. Barkley's framework for behavioral inhibition, the ADHD brain's reduced ability to pause between impulse and action before a thought becomes speech. Hallowell and Ratey, Emotional Impulsivity and Brain Activation. Hallowell, E.M. and Ratey, J.J. (2021). ADHD 2.0. Ballantine Books. Draws the distinction between emotional impulsivity, a feeling that becomes words before it's checked, and behavioral impulsivity, an action that happens before it can be stopped. #ADHD cringe, #ADHD comedy podcast, #ADHD Cringe Lab, #certified ADHD coaches, #neurodivergent, #ADHD blurting, ADHD blurting out, ADHD no filter

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  • August 5 · 28 min

    ADHD Hypersensitivity | Too Loud! Too Scratchy!

    Description Have you met The Hypers? You know the ones. They travel in packs, wreaking havoc along the way - hyperacusis, hypersensitivity, hyperosmia, hyperarousal, sensory overload. If yes, then you already know the world can feel like it’s running at full volume all the time. In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we put ADHD sensory processing differences under the microscope. First we act it out. Watch one of your hosts attempt the Pennsylvania Beekeepers’ Hive Certification Exam while simultaneously battling a scratchy collar, a personally targeted HVAC unit, a rogue lanyard, someone else’s pencil, and a lip balm that may or may not exist. Spoiler: the shirt loses. Then we break it down. Why your ADHD brain processes sound, texture, smell, temperature, and touch more intensely than most. Why the totally fine golf shirt you put on this morning became completely unbearable by noon. Why the ADHD nervous system isn’t being hyper-dramatic - it’s running a much more detailed sensory report than everyone else’s. And why certification exams were not designed for brains like ours - but accommodations exist, and most of us have never thought to look. We’re prescribing three practical protocols for navigating high-sensory situations - situational prep work and real-time survival skills. Because you deserve to inhabit environments that work for your neurodivergent brain, without The Hypers creating chaos. Check the show notes for ADHD sensory accommodation resources. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. Email us at: mailto:TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com *In this Episode:* _The Hypers -_Hyperacusis, hypersensitivity, hyperosmia, hyperarousal, sensory overload - traveling in packs, wreaking havoc. _Sensory Stack Event (SSE) -_Not a meltdown. Not an overreaction. A completely predictable neurological response to cumulative sensory overload. Trademark pending. _Malodorous Purgatory -_The experience of being overwhelmed by someone else’s scent in a public setting while being completely unable to say anything about it because they’re just existing and think they smell nice. And... • ADHD sensory processing differences and why they’re neurological, not dramatic • How the ADHD brain’s sensory gating system works differently and why background noise stays in the foreground • Sound sensitivity and misophonia - when certain sounds feel physically intrusive • Tactile sensitivity - why a fine-this-morning shirt becomes unbearable under sensory load • Olfactory sensitivity - why scents others can’t detect can be overwhelming to an ADHD nervous system • Environmental sensitivity - temperature, airflow, and humidity as real sensory inputs • Proprioceptive sensitivity - the heightened awareness of physical constraint (the lanyard was not joking) • What a Sensory Stack Event is and why it’s predictable, not a personal failing • Why coping strategies like chewing, fidgeting, and rummaging are your nervous system trying to self-regulate • ADHD accommodations for certification exams and professional testing - they exist, they’re for you, check them before you go

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  • July 29 · 26 min

    ADHD Hyperfixation | The Groundhog Day Diner

    In this episode we take on ADHD hyperfixation meals - the totally real, totally neurological phenomenon where your brain finds one safe food and refuses to let go of it for days or weeks at a time. Our skit lands in a very fancy restaurant where the only thing on the menu that matters is whether they have mac and cheese. Spoiler: they do not. Not the right kind, anyway. What we cover What ADHD hyperfixation meals actually are and why they're not just "picky eating" The neuroscience behind why your brain locks onto safe, predictable foods Why texture and taste specificity are real sensory experiences not quirks or preferences How the shame spiral around food choices shows up and how to interrupt it Why fourteen days of the same mac and cheese might be your brain's most efficient coping strategy Prescription Protocols Protocol One: Scout the Table - Check the menu and the restaurant ahead of time and go in with a plan, so the anxiety happens before dinner instead of during it. Protocol Two: Name Your Safe Food - Tell someone safe about your current "it's complicated" relationship with food. Share as much or as little detail as you want - it's your life, your choice. Protocol Three: Pack a Bridge Food - Keep something close enough to your safe food in your bag or your car, so you're never choosing between showing up and going hungry. Validation Station If you've sat at a table in a quiet state of panic because the menu didn’t have that thing, or felt embarrassed ordering the simplest item at a nice restaurant, or cancelled plans because the food uncertainty was too much, hear this: that is a completely real experience, and it makes sense. The hyperfixation meal food rotation is a coping strategy. Not a flaw. A strategy. Sources & research Barkley, R. A. - Executive Functions: What They Are, How They Work, and Why They Evolved (Guilford Press, 2012 (paperback ed. 2020)) Ghanizadeh, A. - Parents Reported Oral Sensory Sensitivity Processing and Food Preference in ADHD (Journal of Psychiatric and Mental Health Nursing, 2013, 20(5):426–432) Jurek, L., et al. - Sensory Processing in Individuals With Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder Compared With Control Populations: A Systematic Review and Meta-Analysis (Journal of the American Academy of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry, 2025, 64(10):1132–1147, doi:10.1016/j.jaac.2025.02.019). Pinto, S., et al. - Eating Patterns and Dietary Interventions in ADHD: A Narrative Review (Nutrients, 2022, 14(20):4332, doi:10.3390/nu14204332) Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it.

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  • July 22 · 36 min

    ADHD Hyperfocus | Superpowered Hangover

    This episode is for every ADHDer who has ever emerged from a Hyperfocus Event™ looking like they just ran a marathon they didn’t sign up for. We act out the whole ride - the lock-in, the time blindness, the 3am productivity spiral - and then get into what’s actually happening neurologically, why the Neuro-Recovery™ crash is real, and how to stop treating your hyperfocus like a character flaw. What We Cover What a Hyperfocus Event™ (HFE)™ actually is & what it isn’t The neuroscience of hyperfocus: dopamine, task salience, and ADHD executive function Why time blindness is a core feature of hyperfocus - not an excuse What Neuro-Recovery™ is, why it happens, and why it’s not laziness The difference between productive hyperfocus and hyperfocus that hijacks your entire day Why “just stop when you need to” is genuinely useless advice for ADHD brains PRESCRIPTION PROTOCOLS PROTOCOL 1: KNOW YOUR IGNITION TRIGGERS Start paying attention to what sends your brain into hyperfocus. Is it novelty? Urgency? Creative problems? Competition? Emotional stakes? Everyone’s ignition system is slightly different. When you know what starts it, you can begin to anticipate when a Hyperfocus Event™ (HFE) is likely - and prepare accordingly instead of waking up with a Justice League-level whiteboard and no memory of how you got there. PROTOCOL 2: CLEAR THE ROOM BEFORE YOU LIGHT THE FUSE If you know a hyperfocus episode is coming, do a quick triage survey first. Anything that absolutely cannot be missed today? Set an alarm. Tell the people in your life. Check the calendar. Make sure there is not a dinner party tonight that requires a pot roast that is currently still frozen. PROTOCOL 3: BUILD THE RECOVERY IN BEFORE YOU START Before you go full Carrie, schedule the couch day. Literally block it. Tell yourself and anyone who needs to know that tomorrow is a recovery day - low stakes, low demand, RoyalKevin-level activity only. Because if you plan for the crash it stops being a failure and starts being part of the process. This is the difference between hyperfocus happening TO you and hyperfocus working FOR you. PROTOCOL 4: SHOW YOUR WORK A hidden cost of hyperfocus is that the output can be brilliant but completely untraceable. Nobody knows how you got there (even you). A quick voice memo or handwritten notes works: “Started here, went here, ended here.” Connect With Us Email us your cringe: TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com Cringe-fession Form: https://forms.gle/nua66LxRdVNvQVkt5 Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube | Amazon Music Because if you can laugh at it, you can learn from it. Don’t miss the ADHD Founders’ Quiz From the Independence Day / Canada Day Xover Episode: https://adhd-founders-quiz.netlify.app/

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  • July 15 · 33 min

    ADHD Masking - The Family Dinner Scene

    Have you ever held it together so perfectly all day, every conversation, every meeting, every interaction, and then completely fell apart the moment you walked through your front door? That's not a personal failing. That's a High Masking Event™. The ADHD Cringe Lab is your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by 2 certified ADHD coaches. In today's episode we're putting ADHD Masking under the microscope. We'll dramatize the full ADHD masking experience - the performance, the crash, everything in between. One ADHDer. One family dinner. 3 versions of herself. 3 family members who all want something different. Zero cracks in the mask. Zero intermissions. What ADHD masking is and why it's not the same as just being polite Why masking starts in childhood and how the ADHD brain learns to read the room fast The Energy Cost - what's happening inside that no one sees Why masking requires the prefrontal cortex to work overtime: monitoring, editing, suppressing, performing simultaneously The High Masking Event - the crash afterward is real, not laziness Our cast: Dana - the "everyone's a little bit ADHD", and the cognitive cost of educating while masking Gayle - the Struggle Hijacker: takes your lived experience, redirects it back while appearing to support you Linda - the Family Narrative: the story written about you before. Why the diagnosis feels like a threat to people Why Jordan's "I hear you" is the most powerful moment in the skit -she didn't agree, she didn't argue, she didn't collapse Why "you seemed fine" is one of the most exhausting things an ADHDer can hear The connection between chronic masking and ADHD burnout Sit with the Ick™ Why learning to tolerate discomfort without immediately performing is a skill Prescription Protocols 1. Name the Mask Identify which version of yourself you're performing. Give it an actual name. 'This is my family dinner self.' 'This is my work self.' Naming it creates separation between the performance and your actual self. You can't take the mask off if you don't know you're wearing it. Over time, this helps you answer the most important question, which one is actually me? 2. Sit with the Ick The moment you catch yourself about to perform, notice it. Mentally document it. What is occurring? How does it physically feel in your body? What are you trying to avoid feeling? This helps you understand your patterns, triggers, and the people that send the mask up fastest. It gives you a beat to choose a truer, more authentic response. If you put the mask on anyway, at least it was your conscious choice. That's not failure. That's self-awareness. Self-awareness is the foundation of every protocol. Find Your Safe Room Not an actual room. A person in your life who gets the real you and has earned the right to see the unedited version. If you don't have that person right now, that's more common than you think, and it matters. Start where you are. ADHD coaches (yes, we're biased, but coaching is a mask-free partnership, that's the whole point), ADHD support groups, online and in person. Reddit ADHD communities, proceed with discernment. You're not alone. The goal is one place where the mask can come off. It does not have to be someone you know IRL. It just has to be real. 4. The Debrief After a High Masking Event™ - any situation where you performed multiple versions of yourself, build in deliberate recovery time. Treat this like physical recovery because neurologically, that's what it is. The crash after a High Masking Event™ is real and documented. You ran a marathon that nobody saw. You're allowed to sit down. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com

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  • July 8 · 26 min

    ADHD Morning Routine | The Chaos Cascade

    Have you ever had a completely solid plan for your morning and somehow ended up late, in the wrong glasses, and smelling faintly of mint? In this episode of The ADHD Cringe Lab, your ADHD comedy podcast hosted by two certified ADHD coaches, we put the ADHD morning routine failure under the microscope. First we act it out — two neighbors get ready for their day side by side. One woke with the sunrise. Made Tulum tea. Posted her morning ritual. The other knocked her alarm clock off the nightstand, drank week-old ramen dregs, applied toothpaste directly to her face, and still somehow said "absolutely" when asked if she was ready. Then we break it down. What executive dysfunction actually does to a morning routine and why starting friction, the ADHD freeze response, and cascade failure turn one small thing going wrong into everything going wrong simultaneously. Why people pleasing the night before is secretly the first domino. Why social media hits the ADHD brain completely differently at 7am when you're already drowning. And why the whole disaster looked completely fine from the outside — which is its own conversation entirely. We're prescribing four protocols for building a morning that actually works with your ADHD brain instead of against it. Because the chaos cascade was always going to happen. The yarn was just the beginning. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com

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  • July 1 · 25 min

    ADHD Gaming Wormhole | Just One More Level, Mom!

    ADHD GAMING WORMHOLE | ONE MORE LEVEL, MOM! Have you ever picked up your phone to unwind for just a few minutes before bed and looked up to discover it’s now three in the morning? We tackle the ADHD gaming wormhole — what happens when your dopamine-hungry brain meets a system specifically engineered to keep you playing. The doors of the The ADHD Cringe Lab are open and the gaming wormhole is under the microscope. Your hosts, Faelyne and Stephanie, 2 certified ADHD coaches, act it out — one of your hosts arrives to record visibly wrecked, wrapped in a blanket, coffee pot on desk, sunglasses on, zero notes, and zero regrets. She stayed up until 3am playing Castles & Trolls. For the science. Then break it down. Why the ADHD brain is almost diabolically vulnerable to the “just one more level” trap. Why dopamine is actually the anticipation chemical, not the reward chemical — and why game designers figured that out long before we did. And why this has absolutely nothing to do with willpower. Also: PokéStops. RoyalKevin, 3 protocols to escape the gaming wormhole. Find us on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and Amazon Music. TheADHDSpaghettiBear@gmail.com What we cover Why dopamine is the anticipation chemical, not the reward chemical. Variable reward schedules — the same mechanism as a slot machine. Why ADHD brains run low on dopamine in everyday life and why games provide it on demand. Progress bars, countdown timers, all engineered dopamine triggers The sleep deprivation spiral — staying up late impairs prefrontal cortex function, making it harder to stop playing, which makes you stay up later Time blindness during hyperfocus — why ADHD brains cannot feel time passing when stimulated The guild system and simulated accountability. Games use social bonding instincts to keep you playing Why ADHD brains feel things intensely and hate letting people down — making the guild trap extra effective Real vs simulated accountability and why knowing the difference is the key to escaping the wormhole Prescription Protocols Use external stopping cues before you start. Set a firm timer before you open the game. Your brain will not give you a natural “okay I’m done” signal — so you have to create an artificial one. Tell a real person. Before you start playing, text or tell someone: “I’m going to play for 30 minutes. I’ll let you know when I’ve closed the game.” This is real external accountability. Recognize the conveyor belt. When you feel like you’re choosing to play, ask yourself: is this a choice I’m making, or is this a choice the game is making for me? The level ending and the next one loading is not your decision. The coins appearing and the progress bar moving is not your decision. Seeing the system for what it is doesn’t always stop you — but it’s the first step toward actually being in control of it. The dopamine trap explained simply Dopamine spikes in anticipation of a reward — not when you receive it. That’s why the next level feels more urgent than the one you just finished. Your brain is already flooded with dopamine before you get there. Game designers deliberately create dopamine triggers. The game is not designed to be fun. It is designed to be compelling. For ADHD brains, which already run lower on dopamine, a game that delivers it on demand is not just entertaining — it is neurologically irresistible. Not a character flaw. It is a brain that found the thing that works and cannot let go of it.

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